Monday, December 4th

146.6

First day back at work since "The News". Might be difficult and I hate crying at work! I know my co-workers will hug me and then the water works will probably start!

Raining here today....odd for WI in December. Hoping it isn't sleet, that makes driving difficult.

Was it you Ann that said a friend said colors were even different once faced with a terminal illness? I noticed Ben yesterday at church being particularly moved/into the worship music. He always sings, but this was different. I'm thinking those notes, that rhythm, those words are sounding a bit sweeter these days and that it is nothing compared to what they will sound like when he gets to Heaven!

Happy Monday, no alliteration today - can't thing of anything appropriate right now!

Good luck today, Paula. When we found out DD was terminal, I wasn't working (had stopped to help her) but she had been. She asked me to go into the hospital where she worked and talk her managers, as they were a close group (had worked together for about 8 years). Yes, waterworks were unavoidable. We had a short window, so I just remember that everything seemed different. I felt like I was viewing everything through some sort of warped looking glass (hard to explain, but I felt like I was in a different world than most people).

Weight 116.4, calories 1330. I ate a few too many unplanned snacks last night. Nothing that I usually don't allow (no chocolate chip cookies), but I kept snacking. I may go to a WLS support group meeting locally tonight. I checked ahead of time and they said they were open to anyone with WLS, even if not performed at their center.

Thank you for the condolences about Duchess. My son says that he thinks Chiquita is just starting to sense that she's gone as she was in Duchess' bed yesterday (she never does that). DS is going to start cleaning up her stuff (the vet said to delay a bit). I just hope Chiquita doesn't stop eating, as more than a couple of days on her 7 pound elderly body could be a stress.

Have a manageable Monday.

Weight: 131.6
Macros: Cals - 1,748, Carbs - 216, Fats - 48, Protein - 101, Fiber - 34
Veggies/Fruits (goal 8): 8
Sleep (goal 8 hours): 5.5
Exercise: Walked 1 hour on our property

Paula, continuing hugs to you. I don't remember mentioning seeing different colors in the face of death, but I've sure experienced and observed some very unusual phenomena before, during and after friends' and family members' passings.

Yesterday's 7 V/Fs came from an apple, baby carrots, tomatoes, romaine lettuce, green/yellow/red peppers, avocado, chard/spinach/kale, bamboo shoots, peppers, and blueberries.

Yesterday afternoon hubby and I had a hard conversation about selling the tractor which I can't operate and about my desire to remain out here in the country after his passing. We aren't yet very good at those conversations because ... well, because they're so hard.

But today is much brighter ... it's hubby's and my birthday, our 22^nd together so far, his 79^th and my 72^nd. It is sooo much fun to share a birthday with your beloved. He gave me The Best Birthday Card EVER! and a big package of glittery-gold stars, since I'm always giving myself verbal gold stars for things like making the bed, fixing something good to eat, taking a walk or going to yoga class.

I think we'll just make this Birthday Week around here.

In fact, Birthday Week for everyone! :)

Happy Birthday to both you and DH! Hugs for everyone! I now I can count on you two to make it a glorious one!

Happy Birthday and Birth Week!

Yes, those conversations are so hard. We did them in little bits.

Time for Monday!

I have a 12 days of Christmas thing going. One day of nuts and yogurt, another of crackers buttered and yesterday full of peanut butter. What will today bring?

Paula, I had mentioned the color thing when I talked about my friend whose husband also faced terminal illness. Her husband and I went thru treatment at the same time (I was only stage 3). I had noticed the same thing about colors, the lighting of the atmosphere, and yes, music. I'm hate to say this, as if cancer can be anything but evil, but thinking back, that alternate visualization was (is?) a gift. Best wishes for you today, this day of both support and tears.

Yesterday I hiked! It was a bit shorter than usual (just shy of 6 miles) and a bit less incline. But I had also worked out early in the morning so I still hurt like crazy afterward. Buster came which was good fun. The weather did not hold for us, but the heavy forest was our umbrella. I felt bad that I didn't bring Buster's gortex with me. So in solidarity, I didn't put my shell on, either. By the end, our outer layers were soaked but we were dry underneath. There were scenic viewpoints that were just socked in with clouds but forest was its usual wonder and the river roared. Pics below.

Peace and Hope.

Shel

So beautiful!

So beautiful!

Oh, Buster! I love Buster!

Me: Go sit on the wet rocks near the waterfall.

Buster: Ok, Mom.