Wednesday 10/25/17

I'm one pound above my range. 140 ! Have to jump on this, and start logging to get it back down. A bite here and a bite there have been working themselves back in. Time to tighten up. I was looking forward to getting all of the Halloween stuff out of the house this weekend, but kids in our town trick or treat on Halloween itself. Who'd have thought ?

Hair and nails today, and a long walk planned. We've got this ! Ann and Paula...positive thoughts. Devon..Blue will be adored. Diane..well retake the 130's together !

Weight 116, calories 1478. MFP says I've logged on 495 days in a row. Definitely a lifetime record for me on being aware of my weight and eating! I'm WFH today, then this week is over. That means only 2 more full weeks (10 work days) after this one.

DSD is coming tonight to stay with DH for the next couple of days. I have to pick her up at the bus at 5:30, grab up a pizza on the way home for them, then go to my in-person support meeting (the last one until after Florida). A pre-op friend of mine is going to be there tonight. She was at another prep meeting a couple of days ago and apparently I was mentioned as a success story (not by name but she knew who they meant). All this on limited sleep (didn't sleep well possibly because I'm thinking about my travels after packing yesterday).

Good luck on DH's appointment today Ann.

Have a Winning Wednesday!

Weight: 131.2
Macros: Cals - 1,721, Carbs - 193, Fat - 50, Protein - 94, Fiber - 18
Veggies/Fruits (goal 8): 7
Sleep (goal 8 hours): 6 hours
Exercise: Yoga class

Yesterday was quiet and felt good to be back home eating my veggies and fruits and doing fika, crosswords and ****tail hour with hubby. Yesterday's V/Fs came from mushrooms, red/yellow/orange sweet peppers (lots!), corn, potatoes, and red grapes (lots!).

Because I've gradually dropped four pounds in the last few months without lowering my average calories, I do NOT want to lose more weight. This morning I decided to raise my daily calorie budget to 1,850 and see if that stops the weight loss. This is a pretty odd situation: I've never lost weight at the 1,750 level until recently, after raising my daily V/F portions and adding an iron supplement.

Thank you all for your words of support for hubby as he faces his upcoming diagnostics and treatment(s). He appreciates them very much, as do I. And thanks as well for appreciating the complexities and subtleties of my reactions at the college reunion. I'm still processing so many of my classmates' stories. People certainly do respond in different ways to what life throws at us.

For the past few months I've been realizing how some of my own life's greatest downturns and "failures" led me to completely new paths that I couldn't even imagine until I was forced off the thoroughfare, so to speak. And those new paths eventually led me to places where I thrived as I never could have done before. On the other hand, I'm the original Pollyanna, so that probably isn't the most objective assessment. ;)

Liz, I am so looking forward to your report of the OH conference. And, everyone, as always it's great to hear what's on your plates ... of life and food.

Make it a Wise (or Wacky, if you prefer) Wednesday!

I am not ready to post yet but MUST KNOW WHERE BLUE IS GOING!

I am really too invested in all of you and your furry friends. Better that than cookies.

Ann, I'm looking forward to DH's appt, too. Yes, lose the limbo. Also, think of you whenever I see Burberry. You are so lux!

Blue is going to a younger semi retired couple. They have one of Ella's litter mates, Rocco. They came highly recommended several years ago from a trusted dog friend. The couple lost their older girl late last year and have been wanting to get an adult Airedale as a companion for Rocco. We have looked at a couple of rescue dogs, but there have been signifiant issues that caused me to advise them to not consider those dogs. When I was thinking about keeping pups from this summer's litters I started thinking about the number of dogs we have and if there was a way to thin the pack in a way that would be good for both the dogs and me. (I am very attached to my dogs and for me to let one go I have to find the absolute perfect home.) I talked with Ron and he agreed that we could let Blue go - but only to the right home. I had already chosen the home and talked with them before approaching Ron, so it all worked out well.

Blue is going to be adored and she's going to get to travel and be an RV dog. She loves travel. We did a lot when I was showing her. She also thrives on attention and the man wants a cuddle dog, which Blue will be. Rocco is a mama's boy, so Daddy needs another girl! She already has a personalized collar with her name woven into the collar. Her personalized and embroidered Christmas stocking also arrived this week. I think she'll be just fine with Lynn and Michael!

Weight; 169 ouch

I cannot remember the last time I was in the 170s. I have never been that high since the year out of my surgery. I know eventually I will be in the 170s and surpass it, but I wasn't expecting it to be this week!! Really hoping this is some excess fluid because I've gained 2lbs. in the past couple days.

I really don't know what to expect as far as weight gain trajectory. I'm finding this very troubling because I have such an all or nothing mentality. It's very hard for me to know how to separate excuse from reality. I shouldn't mind gaining necessary baby weight. But am I hungry or head hunger? A craving I should give in to or a lame excuse?

I don't feel like I ate that much yesterday. Let's see (I hope this is not too offensive of a menu plan--I take some license with my food choices normally, but admittedly more recently)

B-soyrizo breakfast taco (1 egg, 1/2 portion soyrizo, 1/4 c. shredded cheddar, carb balance tortilla), orange juice

S-slice of banana bread and coffee

L-barbecue ribs (unsure on amount, but less than 1/3 of the monstrous portion...I actually ate way too fast and realized how full I was too late), 2 bites baked beans, 2 bites okra

S-chocolate cookie

D-1 small individual meatloaf from Stouffer's, 1/4 c. mashed potatoes, handful of salad

S-special K pastry "crisp"

The first notable thing that jumps out to me is that all my snacks are carbs. I could definitely be choosing more wisely. Still. This doesn't feel like the makings of dramatic weight gain. HOnestly my biggest anxiety in life right now is going back to the doctor in a month, having gained like 8 lbs., and her telling me to stop gaining so quickly. I honestly feel like that statement alone would irreparably damage my body image. I know it would be well intentioned, but I don't feel as though I can be told that and rebound like a normal person. I am worried that would set me off down either a path of damaging weight gain or damaging restriction. I know that sounds scary but I hope this is a safe space to say it. And that's why managing my weight BEFORE I have to be told I'm out of control is so essential to me now. This week is hard with our Halloween party and others parties. But maybe I need to try to get back to the gym, even if only for treadmill for 30 min. a few times a week. And also perhaps going back to MFP and logging calories. Maybe plan out a certain number of calories, and then allot a certain number for pregnancy cravings? Idk. It really makes me sad that I cannot just let this roll off my back. But then again should I be so shocked? Aren't we always saying how we're not fixed for good by the surgery? Maybe to people who haven't experienced morbid obesity this looks obsessive. But maybe this is what I have to do?

Mostly, I am concerned that there was okra on your menu Even two bites is too much.

That said, you didn't gain 2 lbs of fat in 2 days. I know you know but I still had to say it.

I bet your obsessiveness serves you well in other areas of your life --- making you a good student and then a good lawyer and let's not forget kick ass sauce maker (I still plan to go back to your recent recipe post)

Maybe getting to the gym (and the accompanying logistics) could distract your brain in a positive way. MFP even for a couple of days might give you a feeling of reassurance that your intake is aok.

Honestly, tho, I think you are doing really, really well. You don't have to do more unless it serves you.

I would tell myself to feed the babies not the cravings. Carrying twins while obese = HUGE!! "How many babies you got in there? ha ha" Pfffft! I feel your pain, but the weight came right off and then some because I had gotten much healthier. Unfortunately, I reverted to unhealthy and gained = surgery.

http://www.bradleybirth.com/diet.aspx

I would recommend telling your doctor these concerns.

147.2 - down again but still not time for any celebration!

DH's surgical consult got moved to today as his surgeon was still in surgery at yesterday's scheduled appointment.

Ann, anxious to hear treatment plan for your DH as well, I know you are too!

BB, I think logging in MFP and exercising are both great ideas. I did a quick google search and it looks like you need 340 extra calories a day in your second semester and 450 extra calories per day in your third semester, so you could add this to whatever your daily maintenance calories were and go from there.

Dianes - count me in the retaking the 130's group too!

Paula

Greetings Halloweeners

Still at 140. No point whining about it. Just need to do something about it. Have to dash off to the bank in a bit but first have to pre clean for the cleaning lady. (meaning pick up junk and get it out of her way). DH just dumped half a box of packing peanuts on the floor. Great.

Paula and Ann, hope the medical stuff with respective DH is ok. Not easy to wait on stuff.

Devon I am sure Blue will do great in her new home. Petted and spoiled for all her days. Years ago our family had a re-homed champion smooth fox terrier. He was a great dog and enjoyed being the only dog instead of in a multi dog household. Lived to be 17 and was worshiped.

Well gotta go. More later. DH is moving furniture and no telling what will happen.

Diane S