Monday July 31

Weight 115.5, calories 1576. We had a good day yesterday. It was a perfect beach day (warm but with a small breeze and no humidity). We went to a friend's for a cookout in the evening. There was a small blip in the middle when DH got upset because he said I was testy when he tried to take the grocery bags from me 2 steps prior to the counter I was going to put them on (I had already carried in all the other beach stuff and bags). Then he stewed for about an hour before he finally wrote me a semi-legible note on what was bothering him. Sigh... the future is not going to be easy. I really need to develop a lot more patience than comes naturally.

Something is going on with my chihuahua Chiquita. She was screeching when she got out of her bed this morning, then walked around looking very disoriented. She finally settled into her crate (which she usually doesn't go into unless we are traveling). I guess I'll just have to watch her and see what happens. Maybe a small stroke? Or maybe just a really bad dream...

I hope you all have a good start to your week!

Liz... sorry about DH and DFB (dear fur baby). Change is inevitable and often uncomfortable. I often think that changing my thought process and learned responses from 50+ years of morbid obesity to living a healthy physical, emotional, and spiritual life style is the "master switch". If I continue to focus on that, everything else will fall into place. But man, it is amazing how deep those old self soothing responses are etched.

BB... how exciting to raise a child with all of your insights and understanding of your own journey. I think of the dysfunctional thinking I modeled for my daughters, and I just have to roll my eyes.

141.4. Down a couple I think. Yay!

I'm home for a few days. The house was a mess. Darn boys! The dogs were sure happy to see me. Not sure how good their care was while I was gone. Water dishes were empty, dry dog food dishes empty and no raw food thawed out for them. We feed raw in the morning and leave dry out if they need a snack which they usually do by the evening. DS#2 said he couldn't find their food (uhhhh, look in the freezer!) so he fed them turkey lunch meat yesterday! They were happy to sleep with their Mama last night!

Ben's Dad and his significant other will be with him until Tuesday and I should be back by Wednesday night unless I am needed sooner. He started tube feedings yesterday. Won't be able to eat or drink anything by mouth for at least 3 weeks and then will have a swallow study. If that all goes well, he will progress much like many of us did after our VSGs. He will have a reduced capacity just like me and will need to eat 6 small meals per day to get his calories in. I'm happy to have someone to share my out to eat dinners with! I'm not much of a left over fan and hate wasting expensive food!

Heading off to work soon. Need to figure out my leave paperwork.....always such a hassle where I work! It will be good to see patients today, even though I have been "working" with patient Ben since his surgery! Glad I could be of help to the staff at Mayo. Ben's Dad was worried he would have to take over his care once I left. I said the nurses will do it all, I was just doing it because I could and that meant no waiting and was more comfortable for Ben (i.e. showering!).

BB, so excited about the baby. Jealous about the meet-ups. Would love to hang with you all in person! Envious of beach days, kiln discoveries, mountain hikes, puppy breath, tinkering in the shed and even crossword puzzles! Love to you all!

Paula

I'm glad Ben continues to improve. I understand the extra caring you were doing - I did the same for my grown daughter when she was recovering from surgery. Don't stress about the house - maybe the boys will step up and help (I say maybe because I don't think I could get DS to do that - I don't think he really sees mess as a problem...).

Someday we will be in the same state at the same time! It was almost a year ago that I was right there by Mayo!!! And, I will be in Iowa on Wednesday! There was a brief moment I thought about running up to Mayo....inappropriate on many levels but I thought about it!

That's a lot of explanation points. !!!!

So glad that things are going well with DH. Thinking about the darned boys seems like the beginning of the return to normalcy.

Good morning all

yes indeed, baby news is very exciting as is the Ben info. Please could you remind me, ( sorry if this is intrusive) of the surgery that he has had.

Another quiet day until the evening when the campers returned.

Thanks for the bear gift card query. They are piles of poop. The blackberries are starting to ripen and soon we will see evidence of that in the scat.

have a great Monday.

Ben had his esophagus and lots of lymph nodes removed due to esophageal cancer!

Thank you. My boss had the same thing done 10 months ago.

Thinking of you.

Paula-Glad you are home for a few days! I'm sure that makes you a little anxious, but I hope you can try not to worry too much. Unfortunatley I'm sure you'll be working very hard at home, but at least maybe you'll feel better having gotten to check in.

Liz-I must've missed it--was this an East Coast meetup? I went to an IG meetup in Orlando last weekend. It was nice. I didn't know any of those people except a few that I'm friends with on IG. I've "seen" a few of those that you met up with and...let's just say we have different opinions! I'd love to meet all of y'all as you have all been so thoughtful and caring in your words. Unfortunately I think beautiful photos will have to suffice since we're strewn to the furthest corners. To be fair, I think I'm the most central ;) But I doubt Okc is going to be the hotspot meeting location lol.

Afm I think my weight is finally stabilizing. Whew. 159. If I can keep it at this through the end of the first trimester, at least I think I can deal.

We had our big pool party this weekend. We made around 85 hamburgers and grilled about 65 of those. Our theme this year was "Margaritaville." We rented a big dual frozen margarita machine that we kept outside and was self-serve. That helped a lot. It cut down on wet swimsuits coming through the kitchen and falls (the attorney in me is nervous every time we have these parties). It also meant my husband or I were not playing bartender all night (anyone remember Spencer Tracy in Father of the Bride?!). Because of my current status, I broke tradition and actually encouraged people to bring sides for a more casual cookout. The burgers were enough work for us! Plus pails full of chips, baked beans, and I bought some very cute themed sugar cookies shaped like margaritas, clocks (set at 5 o'clock, of course!), flipflops, and flamingos!! DH and I really love to entertain, and we get the house so organized before parties, but afterwards is a bit of a disaster! Yesterday we cleaned up some, and then went with the stepkids to see Girl's Trip. Clearly some extra hormones going on because I was tearing up in this comedy.

Stepkids were both in town because their mom just married number 4. They're old enough now to where they "get it." 6 years, 3 stepdads.

Good for you for making things a bit easier for yourself. Keep it up!

But, I can tell you are going to give the best kiddo birthday parties ever :)