Thursday, May 12th

I can remember many times in my life feeling envious of people close to me who were losing weight when I was struggling.  I also felt the opposite - smug when I was and they weren't.  I never voiced those feelings and was not proud of those feelings, but they were real.  This was true especially of my cousin, who is like a sister to me and was always my best eating buddy.  I can remember my mom comparing me to my cousin if she was losing weight and I wasn't, and my aunt saying the same to my cousin when I was losing.  It just set up this unhealthy rivalry between the two of us.  One of the things I've treasured most here is that people are willing to be honest, even about the not so nice parts of us, and we are acknowledged, not as being bad, but just as humans who are basically good people, who aren't perfect.