Conflicted about a change

What you say makes so much sense!  I just love you all so much... the best support a VSGer could ask for!!

I was late to this post as I was in Maui all week and just came back.  I would like you to know that you are indeed in very good company.  I too started lifting weights recently and was told in no uncertain terms by my trainer that she expected me to gain between 5-10 pounds of muscle.  This scared me to death, but she made me repeat those numbers to her and told me that if I started complaining about it, she would make me sign a paper that shows I understand that this is important and healthy.  I am with you, my head understands but my heart struggles with it.  I think part of learning to maintain is learning to view our bodies and our eating from a new perspective.  I had to learn to trust myself to lose the weight if I wanted to lose it, and to accept it if it looks better on me and I feel better.  In other words, a big part of this journey at this stage is learning to trust ourselves.  When I see the numbers going up, I take a deep breath and remind myself that this time is different, this time I am making choices for myself and not just letting my food addiction and obsession run the show.  Making choices means that I get to decide if/when I want to gain, lose or maintain.  The choice is inside me, not dictated by food, emotions or obsessions.  I am driving this train.  This helps me a great deal to do the right thing even when it doesn't feel right in the beginning. 

Thank you for this!!  Very introspective and insightful.  I just need to keep repeating stuff like this in my own head!!

hi!

new girl on the maintenance block, but can relate to what you're saying.  my surgeon didn't set a 100 percent EWL goal for me, so i haven't been there or really worried about going there.  i'm 5'1" and at 154 i'm wearing a petite 12, medium misses/large petite tops, etc.    i'm not tiny.  so i'm kind of different from most of you guys.  BUT i'm also really comfortable at this size.  want to lose another 20 lbs.  will probably take a year to do it, if it is possible, kind of a rate like a "normal" person.  i look good, feel good, etc.  BUT i'm terrified of the scale.  terrified.  have a lot of guilt (mostly misguided) and fear a creep up every tme i step on.  i step on saying (every time) "i've gained 5 lbs, i've gained 5 lbs"  and i haven't.  i've plateaued right now, but i haven't gained.

clearly, i'm not on the super-train.  lots of conflict in my brain and still working on bad habits after 18 mos.  but just wanted you to know that i can relate!  my FNP at the practice and i set and emergency weight (160) and he had me write down a plan, along with things like: "i know how to lose weight; i have control; i have support (and who thsoe people are).

it sounds to me like you are doing great!  (((((((((hugs))))))))

I just have one thing to say...well really 2.

My male cousin is 5'7 and weighs 198 lbs. His BMI is 31. This makes him OBESE and he's so far from it...he also only has 9% body fat...they are just numbers. Try to be calm about the numbers and continue to make yourself healthy. BMI charts don't matter when you get out of the obese category.

AND You are a freaking rockstar and should be SO proud of yourself. I admire you.