Sorry guys I need a short break, my sweet Tiki died unexpectedly...

Sorry guys I need a short break, my sweet Tiki died unexpectedly...  too painful to talk about right now.

Could someone please take over the daily weigh in for Mikey...

Cindy

So sorry for your loss, we will miss you!

Aww, Cindy, I'm so sorry.  Please take good care....
--Dorothy 

I have changed my mind...  due to my recent illness with depression, I don't want to slip back down there again...

So I trust and love you guys and should realize by now that this is a safe place.

I will continue to come here daily, for my health and for my sweet Tiki.

I forced myself to eat normally yesterday, however, I did not 'taste' anything, and may have eaten a bit less.  Plus I had no snacks and went for a very long long walk...  so I lost weight.  I no longer need or want to lose weight, so I need to stay vigilent and healthy.

I will do my best to maintain, I trust these feelings will pass and slowly life will get back to normal. 

Cindy

 good for you, Cindy. nothing wrong with taking a break unless you think it isn't the best thing to do. 

the only way through pain is through.

I'm sorry for your loss!  ((((((((Cindy)))))))

Hugs, Cindy.  I'm so sorry about Tiki.

sorry for ur loss Cindy.

Aw, Cindy. I am so sorry for your loss of your sweet pet, Tiki. Pets become such an integral part of our lives and are our good friends, that it is very painful, when we lose them.

Please take care of yourself.

Lots of    



gail

aww cindy im so sorry to hear you lost your baby, i know how hard that is... please be good to you and your other baby as im sure she too is missing Tiki..

Thank you so much everyone... here is an MSN message I sent to my parents this morning.  Sorry if the format is hard to read...  but if anyone wants the details here they are.  Even if you don't read it, I think it is good for my healing to express it to people I trust and care about:

Cindy says: (12:14:26 PM)
Hi
Cindy says: (12:14:37 PM)
Do you have a minute...
Cindy says: (12:14:58 PM)
:(
Cindy says: (12:15:13 PM)
I have some very sad news...
Cindy says: (12:15:46 PM)
Tiki died at 1:00 am on December 26th...
Cindy says: (12:16:32 PM)
He was perfectly fine the day before Christmas, eating, drinking, playing, everything seemed completely normal...
Cindy says: (12:17:00 PM)
At 11:00 pm Chirstmas Eve he starting throwing up...
Cindy says: (12:17:32 PM)
And continued to throw up all Christmas Day... he did not eat a thing, did not play, drank water periodically...
Cindy says: (12:18:06 PM)
He kept going outside, and down the steps to lie in the sunshine and face the sea and the breeze...
Cindy says: (12:18:48 PM)
We would leave him there for a bit, but felt he was really vulnerable down there, so we would go and scoop him up, give him some snuggles and bring him back upstairs...
Cindy says: (12:19:10 PM)
Happend again and again...
Cindy says: (12:19:51 PM)
Later Christmas Day he started panting, we would give him tiny drops of chicken broth, to keep him hydrated and get a few calories in...
Cindy says: (12:20:29 PM)
When we went to bed, he was a bit week, panting a bit, but did not seem too bad...
Cindy says: (12:21:13 PM)
If he was not better the next day, we were going to call the vet...  numerous tims in his life he had been sick for a day or so, so we were concerned, but not overly worried...
Cindy says: (12:21:37 PM)
A few minutes before 1:00 am I was woken up.  Don't know by what...
Cindy says: (12:21:52 PM)
I got out of bed, got a flashlight and went to check on him...
Cindy says: (12:22:23 PM)
He was lying at the foot of the bed on my side, below the stairs Barry built so they could go up and down on their own...
Cindy says: (12:23:03 PM)
He was panting much harder...  I called out to Barry and he came to the end of the bed and immediately exclaimed, "What's that?!"...
Cindy says: (12:23:38 PM)
I had not noticed but Tiki had let his bowels go, he had very runny dark liquid and some blood....
Cindy says: (12:24:09 PM)
I was getting dressed to call the Vet or the lady from the Humane Society and Barry was down on the floor with Tiki...
Cindy says: (12:24:20 PM)
Barry said Cindy please come and be with Tiki...
Cindy says: (12:24:30 PM)
Within 60 seconds he was gone...
Cindy says: (12:25:38 PM)
We layed with him, petty and kissing and talking to him for several hours.  Then around 3:00 am we prepared him and went out to the front yard and buried him...
Cindy says: (12:25:54 PM)
We are broken... this is so painful...
Cindy says: (12:26:07 PM)
We cannot hardly beleive he is gone...
Cindy says: (12:26:17 PM)
We don't know what happened to Tiki...
Cindy says: (12:26:26 PM)
We may never know...
Cindy says: (12:26:56 PM)
Tiki was the most extraordinary dog, smart, loyal, playful and so full of life...
Cindy says: (12:27:26 PM)
We are so unbelieivably thankful for the 10 3/4 years that we had with him...
Cindy says: (12:27:46 PM)
We try hard to talk about all of the good times and special things that made Tiki, Tiki...
Cindy says: (12:27:58 PM)
But sometimes we feel cheated for him and for ourselves...
Cindy says: (12:28:21 PM)
If Tiki had the choice he would not have chosen to die... he had a lot of years of love and fun left in him...
Cindy says: (12:28:50 PM)
We could not bring ourselves to tell anyone right away, sorry aobut that...  we have been devastated...
Cindy says: (12:29:06 PM)
Today I felt strong enough to talk to YOU two about it... no one else...
Cindy says: (12:29:33 PM)
I am so very sorry to ask this of you, but could you please tell Kelly and Trish for me...  I just don't have it in me...
Cindy says: (12:30:04 PM)
All of my energy is going towards Barry, Sadi and me... I will not allow this to throw me back into that depression...
Cindy says: (12:30:16 PM)
I forced myself to eat 3 full meals yesterday...
Cindy says: (12:30:26 PM)
Barry and I went for a VERY long walk...
Cindy says: (12:30:40 PM)
I promise you, this will not affect my health, just my heart...
Cindy says: (12:30:51 PM)
I see you typing which means you are now here...
Cindy says: (12:31:09 PM)
Thank you so much for listening and I love you both beyond words...
Dad says: (12:31:59 PM)
OK, I'm here Cindy, just came on, I'll have to read above, but have picked up the gest of it & am so sorry..