when to start maintaining

Hi Everyone! 
I have been a lurker for quite a while, chimed in a few times, but now in need of some maintenance advice.  Although I am not at my own personal goal yet, I saw my doctor a few days ago and he advised me that my body fat percentage is now normal (although my BMI is not--I'm 26.1).  He said that if I want, I can start to maintain my weight if I would like.  He never really had a goal weight for me... always just saying that I will stop losing when my body is done losing...   I am about 30 lbs from my own goal. 

However, I am beginning to think my own personal goal weight is unrealistic given my body frame and stature.  I have always been overweight and have not been at my current weight since I was in 5th grade.  I have not been at this clothing size since I was in about 2nd or 3rd grade.  I have no idea what I would look like if I lost more and I'm not really sure about how I look now since I still feel like I weigh 280 lbs, even though I know I do not.  I also must mention that I did not have my surgery to improve how I look, but to improve my health first and foremost. 

My family has made their opinions well known that they think I should stop losing (they thought I should have stopped 20 lbs ago)... but at the same time, I feel it is not thier decision to make.  I also must add that I come from a family of overweight people and they did not quite understand my reasoning for surgery in the first place.

Anyways, with all of that information... when did you decide to stop losing and start maintaining?  And, what did you do/do you do to help you maintain your weight?  Also, any other thoughts are welcome!

Thanks in advance!

Hi There,

Congrats!!  How exciting! 

I do have a few comments for you: 
1.  Your doctor has given you the choice and has stated your body will stop when it is ready.
2.  You won't know if your goal is unrealisti****il you try to get there.  If you stop now you will never know.
3.  Sizing now is very different than when you were in 2nd or 3rd grade, sadly there is now vanity sizing, so it is difficult to compare sizes now with back then.
4.  Improving your health is most important, but there is nothing wrong with wanting to look your personal best too :)
5.  Your family and friends mean well, but they are just adjusting to the new you.  They have not seen you this small in a long time.  They will adjust regardless of where you stop losing and over time the comments will cease.
6.  No one needs to understand the reasoning for your surgery but you.  You know exactly why you did this surgery and no matter what anyone says, that will not change.
7.  One other thing, after I got to goal, I wanted to continue to lose, and I did, when I got down to my lowest weight, I maintained for a bit, then got off track and gained back 13 lbs.  I have lost that now and 2 more and am at my 'dream' goal.  You may want to create some buffer room under your current weight incase you have some bounce back.
8.  The best way to maintain your weight is to keep doing what you did to lose the weight.  Just add small amounts of healthy calories back in until you stop losing...  don't stop exercising or watching what you eat for the rest of your life and you will have no trouble maintaining.

Hope that helps,

Cindy

Thank you so much!  I've been doing a lot of thinking and you gave me some food for thought!

I am in the same situation. My BMI is 25.5 (still not "normal") and my friends and family are telling me they're worried I'm going to waste away. I don't have any special advice, but I can tell you my plan, based on some good advice on this board.

I'm going to ask my doctor his view, get my body composition tested, and get a second opinion from my PCP. It's hard for people to argue with expert consensus and hard data. Then I'm going to see how my body feels. When I get to where I'm satisfied I'll just ease up a little on my eating regime and see what happens. I hope to lose enough to have some bounce-back room, without going so low that all my friends freak out. (As if I could!)

You said your doctor says you can maintain if you want, but that doesn't mean that he thinks you shouldn't lose more. You might find out what weight your doc thinks would be too low, and then you can tell everyone that he said you can lose up to X more pounds and still be healthy.

I swear, in one breath my friends tell me that I'll have to be vigilant and disciplined to keept the weight off, and then in the next they're worried I'll lose too much. Sheesh. I'm learning everyone has an opinion.

I have learned too that everyone has an opinion.  And, personally, I've found that I don't care what anyone's opinion is... to me, the only opinion that matters is mine and that of my medical team.

Also try to keep in mind that your family & friends are used to seeing you bigger, so any weight loss will look good to them & they are going to think that you can't lose much more ****il you do) and then they will say the same thing.

Love them, but don't listen to them. You need a non-biased 3rd party - for real. They are the only ones who can judge you for how you are now (if it's over/under/healthy, etc) instead of comparing you with how you've been in the past.