help

 I quit my job recently to go back and get my master's. Right before school started my husband got laid off. I have started comfort eating, binge eating. At first I thought, "It's ok, it's just me not depriving myself" which is a philosophy I still stand behind, however this is not that.

I dont' take this lightly. I've hit my doctor's goal and have about 20 lbs to go. I was featured on my hospital's website and in a magazine for my success. 

I'm worried that I can't control this.

I would book an appointment with a psychologist who deals with bariatrics and talk it out. Other things you can do right away is go to Shrinkyourself.com or pick up the Beck Diet Workbook and do the exercises.

Binge eating does give temporary relief from stressful feelings but they also bring remorse and despair the morning after. However, we are on this journey to change those behaviors into healthier ones that will last.

Try upping your B vitamins and B12 because stress eats them up. You also could try some L-Glutamine. It is an amino acid which curbs the carb cravings. Look it up and see if that will help.

Remember you have other ways to soothe yourself. A walk, a bubble bath, aromatherapy, massage or even a good cup of hot tea and some calming music...I think I will have some now.

Until you stop associating allowing yourself to eat the foods that ultimately are NOT good for you and/or aren't healthy with not depriving yourself you are traveling down a very slippery slope.

Ms Shell

This sounds like a rough time for you and husband. Many of us became obese due to stress/comfort eating. We all have to work on ways to deal with the stresses of life without eating. It can be tough. Other suggestions about counseling or reading are good ones. Another is to make a list of other stress relieving activities that are not about eating. I play on line scrabble or other electronic games or crosswords. Reading, fun exercise, needlework, giving yourself a manicure (I do a parrafin hand treatment for sore hands) organizing household junk, gardening - even in planters on a deck, a home facial or thrift store shopping are all fun and reasonable. You can probably come up with your own list. A massage is good and reasonably priced ones can be found as massage schools.

Don't see eating inappropriate stuff as not depriving yourself. Instead, see not eating the stuff as caring for yourself and spoiling yourself with healthy good things that benefit you.

Hope this helps.

Diane

 those are the two main things - deal with stress without eating (or drinking or drugs....) and taking CARE of yourself. 

bingo!

 I think you can deal with this - I think we ALL can & will have to. not your specific issues but Big Ass Stress. it will come for all.

think about what worked for you before and what doesn't.

track, post here or where ever helps you.

keep paying attention. try things again if you think you should or give them up and try something different.

you have the surgery, you have some new habits, you are much smaller and things are easier now (not life, necessarily, but exercise!).

keep talking to us.

Oh golly, if only it were as simple as taking a bubble bath or something similar.  I bet none of us got to the operating table because we knew how to do that.  Granted, we have the opportunity to change and do things differently and those of us here in the maintining forum prove that we have indeed made changes.  But it's tough when life really smacks us in the face.  That's the time that we really have to stick together and figure out for ourselves what we can do.

I have a small group of WLS friends that I have become really close with in the last 18 months.  It's a group that I go to support meetings with, exercise with, celebrate with etc.  It's also the group that really knows me and that I can ask to hold my hand when the going is rough, or smack me upside the head if they see a pound creep up on my butt from recreational eating.   Do you have anyone that can really help you up close and personal as you go through this?  Ask people in your life for help, especially people who know how easy it is to turn to food when we need comfort.  Normal eaters just don't get it.  They say to just not do it.  if only......  right?

So I don't have any sage words of wisdom or advice, but I can offer a multitude of hugs and empathy as you figure out how to deal with things at this point in your journey.  Everyone has given great advice but I think that the main thing is to know that you're not alone and that we all get where you're coming from.

For me, the first step to controlling this would be to wake up in the morning and log my food plan for the day into myfitnesspal .com.  Print it out and when you want to eat, look at it and see if it's on your plan.  Make a daily plan.  Keep things like hard boiled eggs for when you want to reach for comfort. That's what I do.  I bet you won't eat very many of them!  You're so worth it!

wise words

 I understand why you comforted yourself with food BUT stop it. Enough!

Find another way to comfort yourself. A bubble bath, a nice stroll in nature or maybe retail therapy? A nice outfit to fit your 20 lbs svelt body when you get to the goal? By the end of October, you will have reached your goal. Finally! That will feel better than any short term food comforting.

You can control this. Please let us know how you are progressing.

hopefulnca

I don't have much advise other than what the others have offered.  It's sooooo hard to control emotional eating when we have made a lifetime of eating to comfort ourselves.  I found myself doing the same thing when my SIL was dying.  It's up to you to find something else to do instead of eating.  Or, if eating is what you think you need to do, choose raw veggies or fruit.  It will fill you up pretty quickly and you'll still get the satisfaction of chewing on your emotions!