Losing myself ? ? (rambling)

This may wind up being me rambling but i need a place to vent.
Has any of you ever felt like you lost part of who you were once you weren't the "fat chick" or the "pretty face". Sometimes I feel like more is excepted of me now like what I was before wasn't good enough.Or that they except less because I look better I know that may be confusing but it all depend on where your at and who your around. Do guys really look at me as just a piece of a** that we could not be just friends because of my looks. I guess I'm just finding myself in this new body. I don't feel like my personality has changed but I feel like people are surprised that I am still Me. I have had people tell me they were glad to see that I was still the same sweet person. What!? Was I suppose to become some bi**h. Hey that was a recent NSV had some chick call me a "Skinny Bi**h" I laughed. Something else I am SICK of hearing is "Are you done losing weight" or "Your done losing weight Aren't you" or "If you lose anymore weight your gonna look sick". Some of that is concern but some is PURE jealousy. I told you this would be me rambling but maybe some of you can put my mind at ease that I'm not losing it and that we all go through this. Thanks for reading  

I understand how you feel.  Part of our identity was in our chunkiness.  I think it will take a bit of time to adjust to the new body.  And just like it takes us time, I think it takes those we interact with time as well.  There are a few people in my world who seem very uncomfortable around me.  I want to tell them to just relax, it's still me.  But in many ways, we probably have changed more then we are aware of.  We may be happier, friendlier, more assertive, etc.  It will all level out eventually, I think.  And with women, don't forget, we have a primal, mostly subconscious, tendency to establish a pecking order.  Women instantly size up the other women around them and mentally put them in a pecking order.  I think our weight loss disturbs that pecking order with the women we encounter.  It's just going to take time for things to normalize.  Just my take.

I think its pretty normal to go through some emotional readjustments in your social circle with a dramatic weight loss - especially if you are younger and looks and weight are such a big part of how people judge you whether intentionally or not. One advantage to doing this at an older age like me is you are sort of beyond that.

But if you continue as your true self and adhere to your core values and personality which was no doubt shaped in part by some of the hard lessons of being obese, people will eventually see that. And you will probably seem happier and more self confident. Good people will love this, petty people might not. Kind of helps sort out the good friends from the not so good.

I would love to be called a skinny ***** I have been told i am too thin and better not lose more. I don't get too upset. I know my weight is right as per doctor so others can accept it and actually no one has been unkind.

So just hang in there and enjoy your new slim self and your true friends who will feel nothing but joy for you.  Diane

Can sympathize with you, it is a huge adjustment!!
I did have an identity crisis over the last several months, but I just thought it was because my husband died, and I had been half of a couple for 40 years, and had trouble figuring out who I was as a single. I guess it could have alot to do with Wt loss.
I also have had alot of the "I hope you are finished losing now"
stuff, and alot of people saying they did not even know who I was. Some people avoid me, because they think I look familiar, but they are not sure I am who they think, and they don't know for sure what they should say, so they avoid speaking to me at all.
I am beginning to adjust now, I think, and I guess all those people will adjust to the new us also. It is just a matter of time, I think.

I'm not skinny but I can relate to some of what you are saying. Bottom line there are a ton of adjustments we have to make in our thought processes, behaviors, relationships, etc. because our identities as fat people really defines us and shapes our perceptions.

I think it will take some time to get used to it. For instance for some people who do become thinner, jealousy is much more common for them to experience and people treat them differently because they are jealous. Or you may find that you attract more shallow people.

Regardless not only do your perceptions of the world shift, but the world's perceptions of you shift as well.. it's very strange and sometimes difficult.