VSG Maintenance Group
Xpost: 5 year surgiversary!
Abbyide
on 4/11/11 7:47 am - NY
on 4/11/11 7:47 am - NY
Carmelita asked me to xpost this over from the main vsg board. I hope it's helpful!
Hi, I'm Abby!
The first couple of years after I had surgery I was a pretty prolific poster, but I haven't been around much at all in the last three or so years. I try to check in every so often, but not as often as I should have or have wanted to.
So, it's been five years.
I'm going to try to answer some of the most obvious questions someone newly post op or pre op would have. The questions I had, five years ago:
1.) How much do I eat?
I eat a normal meal. What I mean by that is, for example, a chicken breast and some vegetables. A Lean Cuisine. A whole sandwich. I am not limited to tablespoons or 2 ounces, like I was that first year. I could very likely eat more than I do.
2.) Do I get hungry now?
Yes. I know when my body is hungry, but I don't get gnawing pains. For a couple of years I had zero symptoms of hunger, but gradually figured out some of the more subtle indicators. Sudden *****iness being my primary clue.
3.) Did I regain?
Yes. I gradually began to regain after I reached my goal, but stayed within 30 lbs during my second year. By my third year I had healed from all my plastic surgeries, and started gaining more. Between then and now I did some more damage.
The VAST majority of this was MY issue, my choices. I cannot blame the surgery, because I know exactly what I've been eating.
It's very easy, in the beginning, to think you have it all under control. I threw up if I ate too much or anything that wasn't healthy or lean. For the entire first year, I had an aversion to food. That changed. I slipped up, and then snowballed myself into regaining over 100lbs of the 250 that I lost.
But I'm solely accountable for that.
4.) Do I have any regrets?
None. I still consider my surgery as the BEST thing I ever did for myself. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I would not love myself as much as I do, or be as comfortable in my skin as I am, if I had not done this. Whatever size I am, I don't doubt that I'm beautiful. I did a lot of inner work, and was forced to confront parts of myself that I didn't want to, and in doing so I healed a lot of old issues. I have never looked back and I have never been sorry.
I've always been really grateful that I did this, that I had this experience. I made life long friends and had so much support. I experienced Life in a way I didn't think I ever would. It was like rebirth. And it was amazing.
So if you're just starting out, the fear and the doubts and the insanity are normal. Everything that seems impossibly hard right now gets easier. The pain goes away. The vomiting stops. You will stop crying and the sadness will pass. Your hair will grow back, your nails will stop breaking, and eventually you will wake up in a body you didn't even know was hiding underneath.
And if you're lucky, you'll learn how to love it.
I did.
I still do, even if I'm a little wider now!
It takes a lot of bravery and guts to change your life, to make a drastic decision and really DO this. I admire everyone who does.
And the rewards for doing it go a lot deeper, and are a lot more long lasting, than simply wearing a smaller size. Something in you will change, and it will be beautiful--That's what I really wanted to say.
So good luck to everyone here!
--Abby
Hi, I'm Abby!
The first couple of years after I had surgery I was a pretty prolific poster, but I haven't been around much at all in the last three or so years. I try to check in every so often, but not as often as I should have or have wanted to.
So, it's been five years.
I'm going to try to answer some of the most obvious questions someone newly post op or pre op would have. The questions I had, five years ago:
1.) How much do I eat?
I eat a normal meal. What I mean by that is, for example, a chicken breast and some vegetables. A Lean Cuisine. A whole sandwich. I am not limited to tablespoons or 2 ounces, like I was that first year. I could very likely eat more than I do.
2.) Do I get hungry now?
Yes. I know when my body is hungry, but I don't get gnawing pains. For a couple of years I had zero symptoms of hunger, but gradually figured out some of the more subtle indicators. Sudden *****iness being my primary clue.
3.) Did I regain?
Yes. I gradually began to regain after I reached my goal, but stayed within 30 lbs during my second year. By my third year I had healed from all my plastic surgeries, and started gaining more. Between then and now I did some more damage.
The VAST majority of this was MY issue, my choices. I cannot blame the surgery, because I know exactly what I've been eating.
It's very easy, in the beginning, to think you have it all under control. I threw up if I ate too much or anything that wasn't healthy or lean. For the entire first year, I had an aversion to food. That changed. I slipped up, and then snowballed myself into regaining over 100lbs of the 250 that I lost.
But I'm solely accountable for that.
4.) Do I have any regrets?
None. I still consider my surgery as the BEST thing I ever did for myself. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I would not love myself as much as I do, or be as comfortable in my skin as I am, if I had not done this. Whatever size I am, I don't doubt that I'm beautiful. I did a lot of inner work, and was forced to confront parts of myself that I didn't want to, and in doing so I healed a lot of old issues. I have never looked back and I have never been sorry.
I've always been really grateful that I did this, that I had this experience. I made life long friends and had so much support. I experienced Life in a way I didn't think I ever would. It was like rebirth. And it was amazing.
So if you're just starting out, the fear and the doubts and the insanity are normal. Everything that seems impossibly hard right now gets easier. The pain goes away. The vomiting stops. You will stop crying and the sadness will pass. Your hair will grow back, your nails will stop breaking, and eventually you will wake up in a body you didn't even know was hiding underneath.
And if you're lucky, you'll learn how to love it.
I did.
I still do, even if I'm a little wider now!
It takes a lot of bravery and guts to change your life, to make a drastic decision and really DO this. I admire everyone who does.
And the rewards for doing it go a lot deeper, and are a lot more long lasting, than simply wearing a smaller size. Something in you will change, and it will be beautiful--That's what I really wanted to say.
So good luck to everyone here!
--Abby
Abbyide
on 4/11/11 1:12 pm - NY
on 4/11/11 1:12 pm - NY
Thanks so much! I'm so in love with making art and painting right now. And I eat less when I'm occupied by it!
Great post. Thanks so much for taking the time to share your five year experience. Not too many people do that. Especially glad to hear that in spite of a few bumps in the road you are pleased overall with your experience and would do it again.
Please stay with us in this maintenance group. We are about keeping weight off for long term and there is lots to be learned. We are all finding our ways one day at a time. Diane
Please stay with us in this maintenance group. We are about keeping weight off for long term and there is lots to be learned. We are all finding our ways one day at a time. Diane
Join US On The VSG Maintenance Group Forum!!
http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/VSGM/discussion/
Abbyide
on 4/11/11 1:04 pm - NY
on 4/11/11 1:04 pm - NY
Hi Diane!
I'm really going to make a conscious effort to check in and touch base more often. I think it would be really good for me to stay connected and helpful in getting myself back on track.
As happy as I am, I know I could do a little better, and I need to recommit myself.
So thanks for the invitation to hang around!
I'm really going to make a conscious effort to check in and touch base more often. I think it would be really good for me to stay connected and helpful in getting myself back on track.
As happy as I am, I know I could do a little better, and I need to recommit myself.
So thanks for the invitation to hang around!
