Why I can't be happy

" I wish you could just relax and be happy!

Jackie says Hi! 
I didn't want to add on to my yo you thread cause I want to keep your helpful advice coming and I was afraid it would get burried.

I wish I could be happy too. But I can't . I was very happy at 130 and I stayed there for over a year. It was those damn holidays when I just ate whatever I wanted.
Before that, I never had any trouble losing it again if I had a period of bad eating.  My pants are tight. I am worried if I dont take this off, I'll just keep creeping up.

I guess if nothing else, this is helping me eat right and not snack between meals. If I can't get back to 130, I will get as close as I can. I am only 5' 2"

I do exercise and do weight training and have for a few years now.

the opposite of relax is WORRY, which is not helpful.
 
in another thread I just read you said you couldn't cut yourself slack (ANY!!!) or you would eat candy every day.  at this link, check out #1 ALL or NOTHING thinking

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_distortion

you say you "can't" relax and you "can't" be happy - but these things can be learned and practiced and you get better at them!! 

I put it in that order because real relaxation will make everything better, everything. this link isn't particularly good, just came up first. consider progressive muscle relaxation, it's EASY. or how about self hypnosis? google it or find a library book.

www.mayoclinic.com/health/relaxation-technique/SR00007/NSECT IONGROUP=2

Well the reason I asked you what type of exercise you did is because I wondered if there was a possibility that is was muscle gain.  But, if your pants have gotten tighter this is not the case. 

Hmmm, I'm stumped...maybe you eat out too much??..to much processed.  I know I need to make 90 percent of my food at home so I know exactly what's in it.  Hidden sodium and fats can be deadly for me.

Laura

I was feeling the same and getting frustrated...

This is what I did.  I decided to maintain here for awhile.  Take a break.  Not gain.  But not 'try' to lose.  It is so nice to just relax for a moment.

I am still careful, but I am not trying to lose.  It is not an all out diet, nor is it an all out binge fest... 

I am weary and I am resting...

Am I done, I don't think so.  Like you, I felt better at my lowest, but right now, it is not healthy for me to keep struggling.  My head is not in the game, there is too much going on in my life right now...

I am easily maintianing.  I will see how I feel after a rest, and I may proceed again...  or I may just make tiny changes and let the pounds come off one at a time over a long period of time...  for now I just focus on other things and ensure I don't gain...

Hope this helps...  it is all a matter of choices...  I choose to cut myself some slack, I choose to listen to my weary self, I choose to give myself a break, I choose to lower the bar...  I choose to do what is right for me and my health...

You can choose too...

Cindy

Oh Cindy!!  This mindset that you have right here, right now?  I really really hope you keep choosing to have it!  It can set you free and lift so much from your plate of regular every day insanity!

Choosing peace is HUGE, and sometimes all the other things, they fall into place.  And there will always be uptight days, but, you know - its how we know we are still living and breathing!  :}

*squeeze*

Thanks honey, we are all individuals and need to do what works for us.  I just had to figure out what that was... I think I have it now...

This is easy and natural...  all is well in my weight world.

Hugs,

Cindy