LEADER HANDOUT - SUPPORT YOUR WLS

SUPPORT YOUR WLS!

When we have weight loss surgery, our weight

changes and our health improves. But what

happens to the relationships in our lives? What do

you do if your family or friends do not support or

accept the new you?

Not only has your relationship with food changed,

your other relationships may change as well. Many

times when relationships and friendships are strong

and healthy before you had surgery, they will become

even stronger. Your interpersonal relationships will

change to some degree. The healthy ones will change

for the better, the not-so-good ones will fall by the

wayside, and in their place you will build new

relationships that are more positive for you.

Sometimes as you lose weight, the people in your life

can become uneasy. Those in your life may be

concerned that the changes in you can impact your

relationship with them. Change is hard for many of

us. It is common to want to keep things as they are,

enjoy the status quo, and confined within a certain

comfort level. Sometimes the reaction of those in

your life as you lose weight can be disappointing or

hurtful. Give them time to adjust. It is probably not

intentional, and they are not aware of the impact on

you.

It is important to understand that many people, not

just weight loss surgery patients, can find the surgery

and losing weight frightening. Your family and friends

may not be as supportive in the beginning because

they are concerned about the risks and complications.

Discussing the risks and providing the information and

materials you have researched or received from your

bariatric surgeon can help.

Despite your attempts at obtaining support and

understanding from your family and friends, they

might not support your decision to have weight loss

surgery. While disappointing, it doesn’t have to derail

your decision to have surgery and be successful.

You may find that as you become healthy and lose

weight, your identity within a relationship or even at

work as a larger sized person may make people feel

uncomfortable. It can cause others to question

themselves and be less satisfied with their own

cir****tances in their health.

If you have friendships that are bonded by bingeeating

buddies, that connection will change when you

have weight loss surgery. You are no longer able to

engage in your mutual, common pastime of eating.

Your friend may fear losing your friendship.

If you have people in your life that consistently

sabotage your new healthy habits and lifestyle, you

need to discuss it with them. Consider that some

people in your life may have a personal investment in

you being overweight. They may negatively feel

better about themselves if you are heavier than they

are. They may believe they are showing affection and

love by unwittingly sabotage your motivation. Explain

that you need positive and encouraging non-food acts

of their feelings for you. Do not listen to negative

comments, and be happy with yourself. Know that

the changes you have made are in your best interests.