Advantages To Losing Weight !!!

As I go through the BDS, I find myself adding to my advantages daily. I think of Why I started this Weight Loss Journey, there are so many reasons why I not only wanted but I needed to lose the weight. At almost 400#'s I knew if I hadn't taken a drastic step I may not be here today for myself and my family.

I feel  blessed daily, and as I go over my advantage list, I add to it at least 2 advantages, there is so much to live for and to be healthy and happy for. I know some people think I took the easy way out but I don't care it was right for me and they are wrong this is hard, in fact the hardest thing I have ever done and it's something I have to work on for the rest of my life. It's hard but it's worth it.

NO CHOICE ! NO CHOICE ! NO CHOICE ! These are my advantages talking to me .

MELVA

Melva, you are so right….. This is hard work and it is worth it. I am so proud of you!!!

The easy way out!! shakes head These people need to ask them selves what is easy about having your insides rearranged, Yes we chose to have the surgery. If we needed surgery to have a heart valve repaired or have a piece of our lunge remove due to smoking we would have to give our consent to have that surgery, is that taking the easy way out? No, these surgery’s are life saving and improve the quality of life. What we did was make a choice to live. I would do it again in a heartbeat. Okay, thats enough of that, this subject makes my blood boil.   LOL

Yes ma'am 100% agreed, but my a-hole husband told me that, My blood boiled immediately I wanted to start cutting up real bad , but you know because of BDS I was able to cope with his actions by thinking it out, my advantages kept my mind together, I believe he is starting to get insecure and stupidly jealous. Insecure in that I made a decision for me instead of the family, that decision has me looking and feeling better. I don't think he is used to that ..LOL.. at 55 I still turn some heads you know that's just some of the perks of losing the weight..HONEY I LOOK GOOD..LOL. ( sorry if I sound Vain)

I Like our choice, our choice to Live Life to the fullest getting healthy and strong, his actions are put on my advantage list, even drives me that much more to get to goal weight all I can say to the HATERS is get over it Here I come...........

Melva

Melva, 5 pounds a month is a great goal. They say the slower you lose the better. If you are happy loosing 5 a month then that is what you should do. It is better to set goals that you know you can accomplish rather then making goals that are hard to hit , not making them and getting frustrated and giving up.

I do not use the Health Tracker but it is probably something I should look into. I hope someone else can answer your questions.

Hold firm to what you have learned with BDS. Let him deal with his feelings you have enough of your own you are dealing with. I’m sorry that your husband…I’m holding my tongue at this point LOL.

VAIN… no, you have earned ever glance, and even a few cat calls. I’m 53 and I sure would appreciate a few cat calls or whistles. Your determination makes me smile….keep living life, you deserve it!!

Melva,
Since I have been away for a few days, i haven't really read all of the posts.   I agree so much with you that there are so many reasons to live for.  I was close to 300 pounds when I started my journey, but health was declining very quickly.    Right before my husband deployed in 2008, my daddy committed suicide.   Between September 2008 to January 2009, I gained 40 pounds due to stress.   My new doctor told me that I had to find a better way to cope or I would eat myself to an early grave.    I didn't even realize I was eating so much at the time.    I tried for a while to get it off.   I decided on surgery and TriCare (my insurance) had my approval in no time.    I had a whirlwind journey to surgery, and thought I had full support of my husband.   I had mentioned many times to my mom that I wanted surgery and she was always opposed, until this time.   I asked her what changed, she said my reasons were for the right ones this time, and now she felt I was making the decision based on research and health, not vanity.  She became my biggest supporter.   

He was gone when I had the surgery, and offered to wait until he was back, but financially, it was better if i had while he was gone.   My husband gave me his two thumbs up and was behind, UNTIL my surgery got scheduled.   Then I became selfish and inconsiderate of the rest of the family.  

My kids were against the surgery, but they were scared.  Momma was going to have surgery, and they had been through so many deaths the year before, it made sense that they were scared.    Once they realized that I was going to live, and how much better life was going to be, they moved over to my supporter list.  I have three kids ages 11, 6, and 4.     They helped my mom take care of me post opt.   They know what I can and cannot eat.   If I fall off track, they gently try to keep me on track.    They remind me all the time how much weight I am losing and how proud they are.   if I dump which has only been twice, they try to take care of me.    Now that they have seen a dumping episode (both were accidents), they understand when I say no.   Before they accepted my answer, but didn't get it.  Now they get it.    

My husband on the other hand refused to acknowledge my surgery.     He doesn't do anything to sabatoge it, nor does he try to get me to eat things I can't.    However, he does refuse to be a supporter.   After losing 60 pounds, he had the nerve to tell my surgeon at a Christmas party that I can't tell I lost any weight.  My surgeon put him in his place very quickly.    Two weeks ago, was the first time that he admitted he can tell I lost weight.   He says he told me I look good, but he did not.    We saw my aunt last weekend, and she was going on and on about how great I looked and sat there mad and wouldn't even talk to her about it.   I love my husband, and he has many issues that need to be addressed, but I decided I can't validate myself based on what he says.  

I know and you know, we did not take the easy way out, and our husbands would know if they paid any attention to how hard we are having to work at it.     This is the long way to say I understand what you are going through with your husband and his lack of support.   If you need talk about it, I am here.