New Kid In Town

I’m really upset that I’ve gone back to my old self destructive, food addictive habits and gained 30 pounds. My sleep apnea and diabetes are back and I’m now taking insulin again. In a couple of months, I’ll be 48 years old and my son, Andrew, will turn two. It depresses me to think that my actions may cause me to not be around to see him grow up; not to mention the second baby we have applied for. I am reminded of my mortality daily because I find it difficult and awkward to get down on the floor to play with Andrew and also to get myself back up again. My muscles are very tight and I have never had much mobility or range of motion. So I need to figure out a way to not only lose this weight, but also get off my insulin and gain greater mobility and flexibility. And by “figure out” I really mean I need to get over my self-destructive psychological barriers and motivate myself. Thanks for reading. 

Sincerely,

DW

Hi, DW,

It's really difficult not to be nasty to ourselves when we relapse to old habits and gain weight.  I have binge-eating disorder/compulsive overeating issues and the impact on me is never just physical.  The disorders affect me mentally, emotionally, and spiritually -- which then can lead to me stuffing the feelings with food.  I truly understand.

Whenever I start to treat myself badly in the way that I think about myself -- and trust me, I can be a nasty beyotch to myself -- I stop and ask myself what I would do if I heard anyone talking like that or saying those things to someone I care about.  I know that I would never stand by and let a friend or family member be verbally abused.  So, that reminds me not to engage in verbal self-abuse.

I put on 30 pounds and am now battling my way back.  All I can say is that today is a new day.  Your effort to regain your health and your weight loss can begin anew today.  See if you can get a good day in today... and then set that as your goal again for tomorrow and the day after.

Have you ever spoken to a health care professional about the self-destructive psychological barriers and food addiction?  If not, that might be a good place to start also.  We need all of the allies we can get! I went to a 12 Step Program for years and would go today if there were any meetings near where I live.  Instead, I'm reaching out to groups online.  

Believe in yourself.  You lost the weight before; you can do so again.

Good luck!

Mary

Hugs.. Maybe you can see if therapy will help? .. 

One day at a time... One meal at a time.. 

I swear insulin sucks every calorie into cells.  I found weight gain on Insulin was unbelievable...20 lbs. between 2 doctor's appt. in 2 weeks.  Can your endocrinologist give you something that doesn't cause weight gain or even weight loss?  I see some new medications on TV.  Byetta helped me lose weight, but I don't know if it is available anymore.  Take care, Tri

I didn't realize that about insulin. I'll need to check with my doctor about alternatives.

I got back on track 2 weeks ago and I'm down 5 lbs. I should be happy but I've struggled everyday to stay on track. Somehow the will power isn't as powerful as before surgery. It's a war we fight with food everyday then you add Life on top of that! I weigh nude everyday. (Tmi maybe) but I take a good look at myself. Not just physical but emotional one and hold my self accountable. I have 2 kids (11 yr old daughter, and 7 year old son) and a overweight husband who still eats bad. They stress me out a lot!! I gained my weight back  (30 lbs by drinking alcohol (makes me eat). You can do this, just be as gentle to yourself as you can. It's been 2 weeks and only five lbs, but I would have gained that much more if I hadn't put the brakes on. Your here.. Stay. Good luck!

Thanks for your note. Five pounds in 2 weeks is very good. I'm impressed and jealous. I know what you mean about the will power and motivation not being there. It really is a struggle every minute. I weigh myself in the nude too. I appreciate your support.