I'm not on track and emotionally eating

We have a son that has caused us so much grief and heartache.

We found out on Saturday some of the awful things he has been doing.  We had an awful year with him a couple of years ago.  Lately, he has been doing better - or so we thought.  What he has been better at is more sneaky.

I've been emotionally eating over this since Saturday.  I needed to say that to all of you and come clean about it.  The problem is that I am not inclined to not emotionally eat about this.  I'm hoping by posting this here with all of you that it will help me to get back on track and not emotionally eat about this.

Thank you for reading.

Cathy,

Sorry you're going through such a tough time. I hope things get better for you and your family. My thoughts are with you. 

Thanks for your support and good thoughts......

I hear you!  We love them but they drive us nuts!  Hang in there we are here for you.  Do you have something healthy and handy and ready  you can grab  when you gotta grab something?   As you know reading and posting here really does help keep our head in the game.  Good luck, we are here for you!

It is a challenging time for sure.  I need to get some healthy things to grab....good suggestion.  

You're so right about keeping our heads in the game.  My head isn't there right now.  

I'm grateful for your support, along with my other BOTT friends too.  

After reading the supportive replies I received, I feel better and stronger.  

I don't know how things will turn out but I'm deeply grateful for everyone here.  

Cathy I wish you the best with the challenges with your son. Mine went through a rough and rocky stretch from age 17-20 especially. Somehow his life has landed in a good spot. I prayed for a long long time for him to have a safe landing. 

As for the eating, what I see in your posts is a great level of awareness. We know the term "mindful eating" - and at least we can be "mindful" of when we are overly emotional (which is probably un-mindful). If we are aware, we can prepare to make different choices. 

So maybe it goes something like this.

Be aware.

Prepare for the difficult moments.

When you need to eat - eat the better option FIRST. 

Don't mentally rule out the poorer choice - just tell yourself you will WAIT on the crackers or whatever it is for you. (for many years, I equated the thought of a food with a compulsion to eat that food. It's not necessarily the case!)

Repeat the cycle....and it's not to say we will NEVER opt for the poorer choice, but we will delay it. And if we eat the better option more often than not, we probably won't physically have room for the bad stuff. 

Stream of consciousness here...

HUGS.. I don't have children, but I do have a lot of stress in my life.. 

I try to find things that I can do when I start slipping and start eating things that are not good for me.

One thing for me that works - is to remove the the "bad food" from my home. If it is not here - I can't eat it..(or drink it - i.e. wine)

Stock my fridge and freezer with variety of good - mostly home made foods (or some semi homemade - premade - but all whole foods)

make legal desserts - snacks so when the "craving" hits - I have something legal I can snack on... (SF Jello, NSA nuts, some frozen berries , make protein cookies and  muffins...) 

I have to take into account that dealing with stress by eating - is going to make my issue worse - I would add getting fat - na stomach discomfort to already existing stress..  making myself sick because of someone's else action... 

today ... I plan to take a bath... instead of eating a dessert.. and I will bake some NSA cookies...  (1 cup almond butter, 3 eggs, 1/4 cup almond milk, 1/2 cup shredded coconut, 1 tsp baking powder,  1 tbs stevia, pinch of salt) mix it all up - bake as a cookies or small muffins.. (I use muffin top cookie sheet pans). I make 2 dozens - and that lasts me 1-2 weeks... (adding some protein powder to it - makes them more like  mela - instead of a snack.) adding some frozen or fresh berries to the mix - makes them decadent (for me ) desert..

Thanks for the hugs...very much appreciated and needed.

Normally I have "go to" things to do, like you've suggested.  They've worked for me.  With my son's decisions and actions, they aren't working.  It feels too big.  I feel so sad, hopeless and helpless.  

I don't really have "bad" food but I'm overeating on the "healthy" foods.  Still.....overeating is overeating.  Emotional eating is emotional eating.  No excuses and taking responsibility for my behaviors.  

My husband and older son are wonderful, work is great as I am very focused and happy with what I'm doing.  It was during the weekend and then evenings after I get off when I start thinking and worrying about things.

I'm going to pick up some "legal" dessert type of items plus the ingredients to the recipe you shared in your post.  I have two of those muffin top cookie pans so I'm set with those.  I'm going to get them after I post this and make tonight.  

You're so right - emotionally eating is going to make me gain which I will feel horrible about.  It will only add misery and personal disappointment, along with physical discomfort to what I'm already dealing with.  I need to be stronger than the hurt and anger from what he has done.  

I hope I'm not babbling (LOL).....I took each of the parts of your reply and gave each a lot of thought and obtained strength and inspiration. 

Thank you so much 

You are bubbling... We all been there....i just recently had 2 weeks of ...not so good eating...,but i was able to reset.. And Most of the weight that i put on during that that was water weight....so after just one weak of clean eating *- it is mostly gone.  

Now my fridge and freezer is full of good choices...that also include ...SF chocolate treats  (that i make) plus couple of jars of PB (NSA)...and Nuts. But i only allow 2 small jars of PB per month... And when they are gone - they are gone.  

I do follow LCHF. that works best for me.  

Good luck.