Floundering

Hi All, I have been lost and off track for a while now.  At my lowest, I was around 155; currently, I'm around 183.  It's nearly 30 pounds and I can really tell the difference!  I can't quite figure out a way to get "refocused".  I thought I'd do the 5 day pouch test, but honestly, I feel so deprived by the end of a day of all liquids that I'm a woman on the verge by dinner.  Today wasn't too bad: Protein coffee for breakfast, chicken soup flavored protein with chicken broth mid morning, cream of mushroom soup for lunch, a few pickles as a snack.  For dinner a homemade chicken mushroom quesadilla.  Later I had a weigh****chers ice cream bar.  Then, after the bf went to bed, I get antsy.  I started out well; just a cup of tea with honey, but now, I'm sipping a mixed drink.  Stupid, I know.  

I'm so stressed out right now.  I have a lot of stuff hanging over my head with nothing I can do about it, and even though my weight is the one stressor I can deal with, yummy snacks in excess is just about the only thing I can do that I enjoy these days.  And yet, the overeating makes me fatter which stresses me out more... 

Hi Brandi:

Stress is the number one killer of proper eating.  It either causes you to eat to much or not eat enough.  Is the weight gain your stressor or is something else bothering you?  I can tell you what worked for me.  I stressed over my daughter's wedding for 1 1/2 years and gained 70 lbs.  After I was able to gain back control of what was going on with me, I was able to focus back on me and lossed 69 lbs. of the gain within 9 months.  I went back to basics.  I did the 5-day pouch test to decarb and then I cut my calories back to 700-800 a day like a newbie.  I upped my protein to 70-80 grams a day, no drinking during or after meals for at least 30 minutes.  I started journaling all my foods to be accountable daily.  I cut out all white products, flour, sugar, bread, sweets, pasta, etc.  I keep my carbs at 75 net carbs or lower a day.  I started walking for 20 minutes a day and worked my way up to 60 minutes a day.  These are the things that worked for me.  I now eat about 1200 calories a day and my proteins are around 100-110 a day and my carbs or 100 net grams or less a day.  I come here daily and make myself accountable daily.  If you do not feel like posting your eats online at least come daily and see what others are eating to get an idea.  Sometimes it helps to just keep your focus on what you are doing. We have the finest group of women here to converse with and just ask general questions for help.  None are judgemental and all try to help if they can.   I wish you the best of luck on getting back on track.

I have a hard time with cutting back so low. I know Atkins induction style works for me, but I cant bring myself to do it. It just makes me think about food all day.

Do you have any idea what you were eating a day? Calories/protein?

Maybe go in and put in everything (Honestly, everything) you were normally eating on an average day? Check the numbers out and try cutting from there. I like sparkpeople.com cause I can login online from work and from my phone at home.

Are you able to get any exercise in?

No exercise at all.  I do well with food during the day because I pack my lunch, so I eat what I have, but the more the night goes on, the more I want to eat!  I just feel so beaten down right now.  I hate my job and I'm waiting to hear if I got another that I'm really excited about.  I thought I was a shoe-in, but they're taking their sweet time to decide.  Freaks me out.  I'm also in the process of filing for bankruptcy.  I'm at peace with the decision, but until it's over, I worry a lot about whether it will go through.  Plus the stress over weight gain, it all adds up.  I'm talking to a therapist, but it doesn't really help. 

 You are definitely under a lot of stress.  Sometimes it is more important to stop the gain and don't worry about losing until you can get control of the stressers.  Do you like to snack on sweet or salty late at night?  My go to sweet at night is either a Vitatop dark chocolate at 100 calories or NSA ice cream sandwich 130 calories or Hi Lo Maple Cereal and Milk about 160 calories.  My salty snack is honey mustard pretzels from Kay's Products or their BBQ mix bag about 160 calories.  Find something that will satisify you without derailing yourself further.  Sending your (((hugs))) for everything else.

I too had a huge amount of stress due to school, work and family. When I graduated I saw the result of that stress was me at 249 pounds again!! That was in Aug. Some of the stress is gone and so is some of the weight. I'm down to 216 and working on other outlets for my stress rather than eating it in the form of salty and sweet snacks.
You can do it, hang in there. There will good and bad days, but the more you turn to something other than food, the better you will feel. For me it is God, I don't want to sound preachy, but I have to pray to make it through all the stuff I am going through. Find what gets you through.