Gained 80 pounds -- & not going to gain another pound - Any suggestions & support...

I had Gastric Bypass surgery October 2004. I will be 45 yrs. old in March. I am a credit analyst.  I have been morbidly obese all my life. I have a lifetime of mental and physical scars from obesity. Before and after surgery I tried Weigh****chers, other methods of losing weight.  Every thing! 

I have gained back 80 of almost 300 pounds lost initially. I joined Barbara Thompson's back on track program so I can get back on track.  I never reached my goal of 200 pounds. I am considering a revision but I am not getting my hopes up on that front since revisions are hard to get approved.  My program leader already checked with my insurance and they is an exclusion in my insurance that will not approve lap band over pouch.  

I weigh 382 today and  My lowest weight after surgery was 302, and then I went up to 311, next year 321, last year 338 and this year Jan 2010 372 and to date 382.

I use to exercise on average 5 to 6 times a 45 to 75 min each session and weights at health club and at home with Leslie Sasone DVD's. I was very active and one reason for my gains over time I am less committed to my workouts. So far in January I am exercising 3 to 4 times a week 30 to 45 min sessions with walking away the pounds DVDS. I am ashamed to go back to health club since I have gained 50 pounds since the last time I was there--which was February 2009.

2009 my knee gave out and did not exercise for 2 months last year and I have not been able to get back on track since.  I am a failure I just need a readjustment and not sure how to get mind back in focus with my goals.

My biggest down fall is my addiction to and love of food. Surgery can not fix this so I have to fix my head with this problem. My plan is to start attending support groups each month and doing on-line back on track program with Barbara Thompson.  If any one has any more suggestion please HELP.  Thanks in advance for all replies.

Hi Molly,

I hear your pain and fear.  I had my RNY in 2002 and very slowly over 2.5+ years - and doing everything "right" (including 2 hr/day 4-6 days/week of cardio and strength training at my health club) I lost 106 lbs.  After maintaining for ~3 yrs, I started to regain (job/relationship stress/2 knee surgeries - and clearly not dealing well enough with my triggers!) and was shocked a few weeks ago to see my scale up - totaling a 45 lb regain!

I'm committed to getting back on track - and feel really good about the last 2 wks.  This is what is helping me get back in my "zone" - and it's not anything you already know and have done yourself with an amazing ~300 lb loss!!!!!!!!

- Forgive Myself - I first forgive myself for getting off track and letting my self-management skills get shoved aside.

- Review/Model after the behaviors/choices that allowed me to be successful during my original successful weight loss/maintenance years.  I revisited all my journals/etc kept during my successful weight loss years.  Re-research all the things I once knew about long term success after WLS.

- Set Realistic Goals - I set realistic goals for me - no longer what I'd LIKE to have happen - but what I know from experience will happen for me and my body (set myself up for success - NOT failure!!!!!) 

- Plan my Success - I make a plan based upon what allowed me to be successful the first time - including my daily/ave. calories, Protein grams and %, water, vit/min. and exercise.  I also now have wine to factor in since my post loss dating life let me to love too much wine (over food - and easy for me to chose over food - which usually leads to unwise food choices :-(

- Eliminate controllable STRESS - Last, but not least, I limit and protect myself from as many stress triggers as I have control over.  This is a big one for me as I regain my confidence that I can actually do as Cathy said in today's 911 - identify the trigger and KNOW that I won't respond in a way that sabotages my plan.

- Stay Accountable - I stay accountable to myself by using the group here to declare my plan and when I'm having a 911 moment.  I also journal/blog relevant feelings/thoughts etc which help me stay aware and stay focused.

- Monitor Progress - I monitor my progress - Since my body lets go of the weight VERY SLOWLY - and I now have almost 5 successful years of experience with successfully losing and managing my weight,  I focus primarily on how well I'm working my daily plan and feeling.  So, while I do weigh for feedback and monitor progress, I no longer hang my success/failure on what the scale says!  Way too frustrating and apt to trigger emotions that hurt vs. helped me stay in my zone.  Measuring and tracking inches lost are also better for maintaining my sense of accomplishment - (and motivation!).  I trust (again from my successful years) that if I focus on my daily plan the weight will eventually follow.  SLOW AND STEADY has become my motto - which is really hard for me because I am one of those people that prefer quick action (I've learned to redefine MY quick action to be staying on my program).  But after all.... this journey for us isn't all about getting to goal.... it is a lifetime one of managing to stay there once we do get there (Daily Lifestyle Choices) :-)


Like I said - nothing you don't already know and know how to do :-)

Wishing you all the best in finding your way back to feeling good about the journey and your ability to trust yourself to successfully manage it!

Best,
Colleen

 

Colleen,   Thanks so much for this post, this is the main reason I came back to OH.com.  I needed some to you yes I can do this and without another surgery.  And congrats to you also for getting back on track.  I see the site is so sofisticated now and more user friendly.  Thanks again!!

Hello Molly.  I'm still pretty new here, but I know the struggle and you are not alone, but you have to do this for you.  You have to love yourself more than the food and try to make good choices or the best ones you can.  Every day for me is like starting over and some days are better than others.  I am logging my food every day and counting protein, water intake and the dreaded calories.  Eating too little can trigger me to want to binge, so I am having my meals and snacks broken out over the day so I am never far away from eating something and I try to get stuff that is good for me, but that tastes good too.  Best of luck to you and you can do this.  Good luck with the revision.  My insurance says they only cover one WLS per lifetime.  Nice, huh? Well, I guess they are a business, but sometimes it feels personal.  Hang in there.

Hi Molly,

Wishing you the best of success.  When we succeed we all do. I too am fighting with my own weight gaining demons and still working to reach my goal.  Take care.

Z