Well here goes...finally intoducing myself.

Hello,
I have been lurking for a while now, wanting to tell my story, but it is  easier said than done.
I had RNY Dec. 2002.  Pre op weight was 361.  Made it down to 160 by June of 2004.  Oct. 2004 we lost our home in a fire.  I lost my weight loss binder that had all my journals, pictures, and support.  I also lost my B12 shots, vitamins, and such.  Couldn't eat anything for about a week.  Then I think depression set in and started to eat.  Not much later I started having stomach issues and felt something was wrong.  My pcp wouldn''t listen so I kept suffering.  I stayed stopped up and for some reason eating helped with the pain and discomfort.  I started gaining.  It took over a year maybe 2 of suffering, a hospital stay ,and many test to reveal the problem.  The Dr's and radioligist couldn't see it on the MRI.  I knew something was wrong, so I took my MRI and CT scans to my next Bariatric check up.  My surgeon took one look and said I was lucky to be alive.  Scar tissue had tangled around the bypassed part of my intestines to where I wasn't getting digestive juices.  By that time I had gained a good bit of weight.  I had to drink with meals to not hurt and that became a bad habit to develop.  Since that time I battled another bout of depression, anxiety, and was diagnoised as bypolar.  I was put on 3 meds and gained another 50lbs in just a few months.  Then I developed a hernia, took a while for Dr to find it.  Had hernia surgery May 2008 and moved to Georgia 3 weeks later.  I haven't been to a doctor since.  Has been over 3 years since a check up with bariatric doctor.
June 2009 I finally got on the scale and about died when it said 283.  During the summer I lost aobut 15 pounds.  I started going to a weightloss clinic in September.  My starting weight there was 269.  Today I weighed 250.  Two months ago(one week after starting with clinic) I hurt my back.  This week has been the best week painwise for me since the injury. I Babysit for a chiropractor.  X ray showed severe scoliosis and last vertebrea is almost herniated.  I also have pain in left leg, foot, and heel.  I got orthotics today for my shoes that are suppose to help align everything up better.  I still haven't been released to exercise.  Pain in my leg prevents me from walking very far at a time.  For past few weeks I have been doing much better sticking to mostly protien.  I have been pushing liquids and workiing on no liquids with meals.  I have pica real bad and eat ice constantly.  I am glad to found this group.  I know I need support.  I am currently trying to find out if 2 surgeons that were refered to me accept my insurance and accept transfering patients.  My bariatric surgeon is in Arkansas 12 hrs away.
Was hard to post my info.  Most everyone else has had a 20-40lb regain and I had a 123lb regain. 

I was going to wait until morning to respond to you, when I was more clear-headed and awake, but I really couldn't just read this and in good conscience wait.

Welcome to BOTT. I am so proud of you for being so brave and comming to tell your story. You have had an amazing, heartwrenching, difficult journey and to try to sum it all up in a few paragraphs must have been hard. But I think you did a fine job of it, and I am so ready to be here for you!

You mentioned your scar tissue was strangulating your intestine. My mother just had surgery Sunday for this exact issue, she is 8 months out. I can't imagine the pain and suffering you went through during 2 or so years of that, she was in imense pain for only a few months. Its shows how strong you are. Your whole journey shows your strength.

Please don't feel like this is some sort of apples and oranges thing. Whether anyone has 10 lbs or 100 lbs to get to goal (or for some of us, are AT goal and trying to maintain), we are all here for the same reason. We want to help and support each other, and have a safe, judement-free venue to come to for those things. Advice, support, caring, thoughfulness, grace, kindness.... and honor. Those are the things I believe BOTT provides, and why I rarely surf any other boards anymore. Nowhere else provides the sort of environment that I have found here.

It sounds like you're slowly on the road to mending your body and getting ready to get BOTT. It also sounds like you are taking the time to mentally prepare, are making the adjustments to your lifestyle and eating habits, to get things back where they need to be. You're doing great. And sometimes, all we need to do is add just a little more every day to help burn just a few more extra calories. I understand that walking and other high/medium-impact exercise may not be for you. But I see you are in GA. Are there any pools nearby? Water-aerobics and just plain swimming is some of the most gentle exercise out there, but also some of the best, heart-healthy methods of movement. Can you swim at all?

Thank you for your brave, eye-opening post. I'm very happy you've joined us at BOTT. Please don't be shy, post often, share your journey, struggles and successes with us so we can be there beside you the whole way.

Thank you so much for your reply.  Brought tears to my eyes to know someone understands and will be there when needed. 
I love water areobics!!  It is my favorite form of  exercise.  I use to do 1-2 hrs a day at least 3 days a week when I lived in Arkansas.
I live in Perry, GA and the neares****er areobics is Warner Robins or Macon and both are 30 mins. away.  I keep kids in my home from 7:30 am til 6:30 pm.   And there are not any classes availiable during my free time.
There is a curves about 10 minutes away and I hope to eventually be able to do that as soon as I am released my Dr.  I did pretty good with that, cause it isnt hard to do the 30 minutes and there are no men to worry about seeing my flab flapping, lol.

Good grief girl!  You have had a time of it haven't you.  Sounds like you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and are headed toward it now.  Give yourself credit for the things you've done for yourself, against so many odds.  I don't know that I would have been as strong as you have been.
Try to focus a few minutes every day on yourself, you deserve it!
Welcome to this fantastic group of supportive people.  Come and post often.  It really does help to 'speak out loud' to someone who truely does understand.

What a remarkable lady you are!!!!   You are an inspiration to all of us.   If you keep children, you may not be "walking" in the "a-mile-a-day" mode, but I can assure you you are getting exercise LOL

Don't worry right now about how far you walk - a mile's a mile whether you walk it all at once or n 20 times.  The most important thing is to listen to your body - everybody's body is different.  Please, TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF  

Know that we are here to help you in any way we can.  I agree wholeheartedly with Sion, this is a wonderful site - I hope you find it as helpful as I have WELCOME   If you are comfortable, please post often and allow us to share your journey.

WE CAN DO THIS TOGETHER - YES WE CAN

Hello

I wanted to add my welcome to you.  Thank you for being brave and sharing your journey with us.  I am so impressed with the weight you have lost recenlty, despite your health difficulties - that can't have been easy for you, it isn't easy at the ebst of times, let alone dealing with everything else at the same time.  283 to 250 is an amazing accomplishment - well done.

Ruth

Welcome, I too am new and find that this is an awesome group. Every chance I get, I break away from work to check it out. You have been through so much and I want to thank you for sharing it with us. Discussing your problems with those who can relate I think will give you the inspiration to continue BOTT. Keep moving forward....you have done remarkable!