Confession of sorts...

Hey BOTTers,

I never hit my goal but got down to around 225 last year and was happy knowing I was really close to being under 200 - then to my goal of 180. I even set up some consults with a PS to have that image of what I can look forward to to get under 200 lbs. But I stalled out being in relationship (not his fault) just seems like we both like to eat!  Then my Dad got sick this year and all that family stress that comes with that issue (most of us probably have been there at one time or another) I have crept back to 250. No excuses here. I am the one making bad choices..I am glad that I am body aware now but damn - I seem to get a good start then fall back down quickly.

I have incorporated exercise back into my life which helps tremendously - but then I feel like I need more food. So I track my food with an app like the one on this site. During this process of trying to get my butt back on track for a consistent amount of time - my surgeon's office calls last week - to see me. It's been 2 and 1/2 yrs since my WLS and I haven't been in since my 1 year check up! So of course I cringed but went ahead and made an appointment. The soonest I could get in was late Oct. So this should really be the push to get my butt in gear. I don't want to hear his disappointment or scolding that could come - I know what I need to do - now I just have to do it. I have always been very realistic and knew weight loss and maintaining would be a life long job - but I think I got comfy just being more "normal" looking even tho I didn't have this surgery to be kinda heathly - I need to remember I did it to be my best. So if anyone relates feel free to chime in or just any input is welcome. I can take it!  I just needed to blog this out.  :)  

HI Tina

thanks for sharing your thoughts.  One thing stuck out for me and is something that I will plant in my thoughts and that was your comment - I didn't have this surgery to be kinda healthy.

That came as a good reminder for me.  I didn't have wls to be kinda healthy, but to BE healthy.  So I'd better do something about it, and not settle for kinda, right!!!!

I'm sure you have the right frame of mind to get those extra pounds (well at least a good deal of them) off before your consult.  Keep in touch and I look forward to hearing how you are doing.

Thanks again

Ruth

Thanks Ruth, my brother helped me see that. Not everyone could have got away with telling me that but it was an eye opener.

Best to you!

Its so hard when life gets in the way!!! I have always said that if I have a goal (ie: upcoming dr appt, big party to attend, etc) it helps to keep my motivation up and I do really well!!! I'm sure by your appt in Oct you'll be exactly where you want to be so you can feel confident when you walk into the dr's office! Keep up the good work and never give up!!!

Tina,

Wow, reading your post reminds me of my situation. I went three years without seeing my surgeon and only saw him when I started gaining weight and having constant nausea. I dreaded going back to see him. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. 

This is an awesome group as far as support goes. You have an awesome start on getting/being BOTT. Keep it up and you can drop some of those pounds/inches before you go back in October.

Tina - remember scales cannot measure worth - just weight.  Only you can measure worth and never ever forget that you, just like every human being born, have infinite worth.  Infinite means you can neither add to nor subtract from - it is infinite.  Think back to when you looked at a newborn - did you have the slightest doubt that child had infinite worth?  EVERY CHILD BORN HAS INFINITE WORTH - (and you didn't crawl out from under a rock - you were born)  Celebrate your worth