Off the Wagon in VA

Well, I am finally in VA, settled in to our apartment until our house is finished. I have started at my new job (same company as before, new position) and overall think I am pretty much back to normal… I have been very hesitant to post, because I have NOT BEEN DOING WELL AT ALL when it comes to BOTTing…. I have been lurking a few days because I was ashamed to post, ashamed to admit I have fallen off the wagon, not just slipped off, I mean hard core fell off… Being on the road for a week started it all, we were eating out every night, and I tried to pick the ‘healthy’ stuff from the menu, it was not always the best food, and I knew that. I also knew I should not be having a margarita or other mixed drink with each dinner, but I did, for the most part. Then I told myself, oh, this is like a vacation, I will allow it till we get to VA. Well, now we are here, and are still eating out 2-3 times a week, I have cut back on having a drink with my meal, but I know that is not enough. I have however, been much more religious with my protein drinks, I have had one every morning since we have been here (that is 30g), much better then I did before, I was not taking in ANY protein drinks, so I am happy with myself about that! I am committing to myself (by posting this) that this week I am getting BOTT again. I promise to workout AT LEAST 3 days a week (I know does not sound like a lot, but I want to start with a number, does not mean I will not go more often if time permits), continue with my protein drinks, and increase it to 2 a day, stop drinking ANY fluids with my meals, and start journaling what I eat. My first goal, is to lose 10 lbs by my birthday (May 3^rd), I will be a third of the way to my final goal if I can do that. I plan to reward myself with a new outfit for every 10 lbs I lose, and when I get to my final goal (down 30 LBS) I plan to buy myself a tanning package…. I want to tan this year so bad, but will not allow myself if I do not reach my goal…. Sorry this is so dang long, it has just been forever since I posted! I thank you for reading and hope you are all doing well! Have a great BOTTing Day! Denise

Oh Denise, I'm so sorry you felt ashamed and didn't post.  This is undoubtedly the most caring, supportive and accepting groups of folks I've every found  I'm so glad you got brave and posted today

Please forgive yourself for being human (isn't it a bother?  )  It's just not realistic to think we're going to go the rest of our life and never get off track.  I like what Cathy teaches us - that it isn't the getting off track that's important - it's what we do the next day.  AND THIS IS YOUR "NEXT DAY"  Give yourself a giant pat on the back - you deserve it 

Sounds to me as though you have an excellent plan for the week.  If you feel comfortable, please share with us day by day.  I believe in you, please join me in believing in yourself and happy BOTTing.

Denise,

Don't be ashamed of getting off track. Iff we were all perfectly compliant with our weight loss goals, we would not need this group. Thankfully there are people hear who understand the issues we are dealing with and will support us with advice or a kick in the pants when we need it.

You have set reasonable goals and have a plan in place to get there. Post often for accountability and ideas. You'll be tanning in no time.

Hi Denise, Just know that the reason we are all here is because we all "got off track!"  You are not alone.  Last time I checked our group total it was 751.  So, you and 751 other people have all gotten off track  and needed help to get back on =)  That comforts me when I see that number going up.  I know I am not a failure and am not the only one who needed a kick to get BoTT.  Posting has really helped me with increasing my protein and my water intake.  Going back on an acid reducer has helped with my hunger and reduced my calories and now I need to increase my cardio to make it all work in my favor.  It seems like it is always something!  Be glad you caught it so soon, I have been off track since before Christmas!!!!  I gained 6 lbs when I was only 4 lbs from goal, so I have to go through the misery of the "last 10" all over again!  I have committed to getting some counseling, so as soon as I can get my cardio on track, that is my next step.  One thing at a time!  Good luck Denise, please don't hesitate to post, we love reading that we are all human and need help =)  Robin

You can do this, Denise!!!!  We're rooting for you!

hi denise,
1st of all, i think your post is a huge step towards getting yourself back on track, so YAY for you!!!

2nd of all, please do not ever feel ashamed to admit to any of us if you are struggling.. isn't that why ALL of us are here??? If this was an easy journey, then WLS would not exist as we would all be at our desired weight. This is so difficult... sometimes we are on track and it just seems so natural, but mostly it's a difficult battle. Its hard enough to stay on track, but beating yourself up and feeling ashamed will only make you feel worse about yourself and those feelings won't help you to forge ahead. You have made changes in your life and perhaps you needed a break... does not at all mean that your journey ends here!!!! somehow you need to dig down deep and muster up the energy to dust yourself off and move on. The past is the past and you cannot go back... only forward. Maybe you can make smaller goals for yourself and then keep adding on as you gain momentum. You don't have to go full-on hard core if you are not emotionally ready. Perhaps cutting out one behavior at a time that is interfering with your goals??? You can do this and we are all here to support you. It's nice to read about people who are succeeding.... but not all of us are... maybe your first resolution should be to use us as your 'safety net' and look to us for suuport. that's what we are all here for.. we all need it!!! anyway, no one judges you. we all understand you because we all walk the same path. lots of love and positive vibes...
Cari

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement it really does me a lot to me!  I have been doing better this week, not as well as I wanted, but it is defiantly a step in the right direction!