Emotional Eating

Hi everyone, I'm new to this board and am interested in learning about you and your WLS journey.  Today, I am trying very hard to regain control of my eating and reclaim my health - both in my body and my head.  For me, it starts with the head.  So as this is a board of tremendous support, let me share a little of my story and ask that anyone who might be struggling with the same issues to chime in with your strategies for success.  I had my surgery in March of 2004 - can't believe I'm about to celebrate my 5th year anniversary! I went from 368 (the night before surgery; I've been higher, however) to my lowest weight after surgery of 138. I am currently maintaining at 155 and trying very hard to get back to 140, where I felt really good. Here's the thing: I am an emotional eater. It's how I got to be at 401 lbs. at one time in my life; it continues to be my greatest challenge today. For me, it's not so much about the hunger but more about how to manage the emotions that trigger the hunger. Five years out, my experience is that I can eat anything - anything - without a problem. If I graze, I'm in trouble; if I stay focused on a healthy lifestyle, I'm much better. This isn't rocket science - I know I must embrace specific lifestyle behaviors: healthy eating on a daily basis, and workingmy body in a manner that will keep me fit and strong. These things I must do or I will regain the weight. At this stage of my journey it is a huge struggle - but I am optimistic about my ability to continue on my path toward optimum health and passionate living. Am I hungry? Yes, every day. Who isn't? Some days I can push past the hunger and take good care of myself; others, I succumb to eating whatever it takes to sooth my feelings of anxiety, stress, sometimes sadness and then I'm in deep doo-doo with the food.  So there you have it - up 15 lbs. from my lowest weight and struggling mightily to stop gaining. How about you? Please share. Thanks so much. Maureen

Maureen
  Hey there, just read your post and glad to hear you share your story.  I just joined this group  about a week now and I really think it's where I need to be.  I know that when I get on here I do better hearing the struggles and the mainly the support I get here.  I am four years out myself and slowly regained about 20lbs and like I have said many times before it's not so Much the weight but the grazing all day my old habits that have become part of my life again.  I am trying to not be so hard on myself and just do what is suggested.  Water, Exercise, less carbs, more protein and I think very important journalling which I do sporadically.  I am doing ok on the other things just not the journaling BUT I will today.  I am not quite ready to post my food publically yet and that may take some time because I dont eat anything like I used to when I first had the surgery and basically eat anything and everything so that may take a little more time.  Seeing how people eat is so helpfu though cause it lets me know I can still eat that way and that there is hope for maintaining my weight.  So, I would just jump in here and be a part of it that's what I am doing.  Take care Susie

Maureen,

Thank you for sharing your story!  I had RNY in March of 05 and went from 315 (morning of surgery) to 149.5, then got preggers and went up to 190 and am down to 169-171 depending on the day, and am trying to get back down to 150...  I am a bit of an emotional eater myself, well maybe not emotional, but I eat when I get board!  I have learned I have to stay busy, and 'find time to eat' as opposed to having nothing to do but eat.  I tend to do really well on the week days when I am at work (as long as I do not keep snacks around the office) but come the weekend, I have to really try to find something to do with my day so I do not sit and eat all day! 

I also found tha****er sometimes cuts the head hunger... I always try to drink water when I feel like eating random stuff, and that seems to help.  I am also a gum chewer, I almost always have a piece, or two, in my mouth, seems to keep my mouth busy!

This board has offered great support as well as advice to me, and really has made a difference, stick around and I am sure you will see what I mean!

Have a great BOTTing day!
Denise

Denise,

Can I ask what type of gum you chew?  May sound like a funny question, but I was told if you chewed something with a very strong flavor, that you are less likely to eat something because everything you eat would taste like that.  I have yet to find a sugar free gum that did that for me.

Thanks

Pam

Hi Pam,

I chew all kinds of SF gum, everything from a fruity to a mint taste... I can say that the mint flavored gum tends to make the food I eat after chewing it a bit 'icky', but noting that I can not get past :)

Sorry, not much help!

Hey Pam,

Try any flavor of the Extra brand gum.
Especially the fuity ones. They're so strong I can smell them while they're in my purse.

Katrina

First, so glad you're here   Then give yourself a GIANT pat on the back for dealing with 15 pounds rather than 150 pounds!!!!

I'm just betting you were raised by a "food pusher" who subtly and not so subtly taught you food = love.  I know I was.  So when we need comfort (and that's normal) we head straight for food.

Now to hungry - you already have this nailed down - few of us, if any, know what "tummy" hungry is (goodness knows, we've worked very hard NEVER to experience that! LOL) but we sure are experts on being "head" hungry.  Sometimes, but not always, if I just stop and REALLY assess if I'm tummy hungry I know I am not - sometimes I'm very good at convincing myself "What do you mean?  Of course I'm tummy hungry!!!!"  (Righteous indignation is so satisfying sometimes LOL)

Don't know whether you have children or not - if not, call on your imagination.  If your child was doing something to harm themselves, you would love them enough to tell them to stop.  You wouldn't say, Stop if you want to.  or   Stop if you're comfortable stopping   or   If it's not too hard, please stop.  No, you would demand they stop and expect them to mind you.  The thing of it is, as people who have been fat, we've developed a double standard.  We filter stopping through all those conditions.  We have to love ourselves enough to not do that.  BUT we don't have to set the time line to "until I've lost this 15 pounds"  We don't need to make it a month, a week, a day, or even an hour.  Just "Stop for the next 5 minutes"  Now most of us can sustain stopping for 5 minutes - then add the next 5 min etc etc etc and lo and behold  we've stopped for an hour.

We've all been there and done that and now WE ARE DOING THIS TOGETHER!!!  and that's the remarkable thing about this site.  The people here truly CARE about each other. 

Again, I'm glad you're here - please come often 

I am an emotional eater.  I am dealing with that.  I am 9 months post op and now the hunger and the head hunger are back. 
I am trying to learn how to deal with emotional eating.  Talk to my psych, try to recognize my emotional triggers for overeating.  Also, someone suggested "Dr Beck diet solution".  I bought the book (a few days ago) and so far I only started reading it, but I already like it.

She recommends changing your attitude towards diet, being slim, exercise.  This is a new approach for me.  I think I will try it. 
I am traveling this week, and in the past my travels were always excuse to overeat, eat the wrong thing (sugars and carbs) to mask the stress  of travels and business meetings.  This trip I already applies some of the book recommendations and so far so good.  Even when I ate too much - it was protein rich food (extra meat, salads)but overall average for me this week is very good (this surprised me).  2 weeks ago I was on a cruise, and blew my diet totally. (got sick a few times).  I did not have the book, so maybe? there is hope for me. 

I bought the book on Amazon.com, and it did not cost me that much.  Just an idea...

The book do not give you a diet but the training and exercises are suppose to help you stick to your diet...  just an idea...

Now, since I lost most of my weight, I need to find something that will help me mainain, and not gain.  Emotional eating is what I need to get under control...

Emotional eating is my downfall too. It wasn't until about 2yrs post op that I realized it was a problem and I had to seek out a therapist that specialized in eating disorders and was wls friendly. I'm not sure if I ever really thought I had a problem or knew how/why I ended up at 328lbs. As crazy as that sounds I never put it all together until I had the weight off and then was like "well, now what?" It was pretty scary! I have learned thru therapy some coping mechanisms~sometimes they work, sometimes they don't~its still a struggle, but I do feel better about the fact that most of the time I can win the battle. I want to congratulate you on a successful 5yrs!!! And wish you continued success in the future!!!!!!