Well we're finally both done and so far no problems between us. The only issue is that we've both experienced blood loss for some reason and that has slowed down our recovery somewhat. But he's finally coming home from the hospital today (surg was MON) and I finally went back to work. So we'll have to see where it goes from here. Good luck to you and keep in touch! -Jennifer

My wife had the surgery about 6 weeks ago, and has lost 36+lbs. I have since been eating a modified diet with her and lost 26lbs myself. I am much larger than her (5'10" 289 now vs. 4'11" 166), but I still think it is funny that no one but me notices I have lost any weight till I point it out...

I have often wondered if it were not for my kids if I would also get a divorce from my post WLS spouse. If the reason is that you got the band, then get rid of it and go back to what you had if it was wonderful, if you can, if it's what you both want.

Hi there, I have to say that I know what you are feeling....I was 313 and am now 175...and I look damn good. My marriage wasn't great before and now it is even worse! My very best friend who is still a large woman doesn't want me to be around her friends because I look "too good". So I have no one....although I am meeting new people every day....and they don't know that I was a big girl.... it is awsome! I feel like for years I have lowered my standards so that I could be happy and not disappointed. Now I am not willing to do that and it seems like everyone doesn't know how to take that... Anyhoo, you are not alone in your feelings, seek counseling or a friend and chat it out....or post here too! deb

Hi there is so much I am going through...I dont even know where to begin. As I sit here and write this I am in tears. I have been married for about 16 years and I recently had the surgery about 6 months ago...and every thing is changing. I knew that there would be changes but this is alot. I thought my marriage was strong enough to survive this but now i just dont know. I guess we have always had some problems in our marriage but I thought I could handle them as they came along and now i just dont know anymore. I feel like I am becoming a different person like sometimes I think I know just who I am and then the next I don't. Then its like oh yeah I remember her and I see myself again but then I just shut the door on her because I am afraid. Afraid of what? I dont know....I want to be me I want to experience life and I want freedom but yet I just cant seem to do it. My husband is never gonna change...he is held up by things he is unwilling to work on and I feel like I cant deal with that anymore but yet its like I keep making excuses to not be happy. I know that I can be a strong person but I cant seem to find her. I had this surgery to come back to me and now I dont know where I am. Please has anyone ever felt this way...I just wanna know what to do. I just wanna be me. I just want to be happy. and the sad part is is that I thought i was until this surgery these changes its just bringing all sorts of things out and now I realize that I have just been putting up with it, pushing things in the corner outta sight outta mind...but now it just all consumes me.