Not a complaint, but an observation and just plain old puzzled

There is always the big discussion on whether to keep your surgery to yourself or to share it.  Many have told me that keeping it to myself is not going to work, that people will notice and they will ask questions.  Well, I am here to tell you that is not my experience.  I think I posted about seeing my family at Easter and not having seen some since Christmas and not one of them commented on my weight loss.  Not one.  To date only one person in my office has commented and said she could tell I'd lost a lot of weight.

Yesterday I went to have my hair done, I have been seeing the same woman for eight years.  I go every 5-6 weeks.  In the course of getting color and cut done I had to slip away for the potty twice. On the second time I told her I had been drinking about 100 oz of water a day and she said 'oh, trying to lose some weight?"  I just about fell out of my chair.  I have lost almost 50 lbs, how can you not notice that?  

As I said I'm not really complaining because I do want to keep my WLS to myself but at this point it is odd to me that people are saying things like "are you trying to lose weight"  My sister and I went to breakfast one day a few weeks ago and I ordered two eggs and turkey sausage and nothing else and she said "oh are you trying to be good?" I said yeah, I've been pretty militant about my food lately and she said "have you lost any weight?" 

Hi,

I know sometimes people are scared to say anything because they are afraid your not well. Some of the first people that said things to me would say I see you've lost a lot of weight is that a good thing? I work in sales and I know many didn't say anything to me but would ask my fellow workers what was up with my weight loss. I'm sure soon people will be asking :) Great job on your loss keep up the good work.

Trish

That is strange after losing 50 pounds, especially with the person that does your hair. They are bound to notice. They notice everything.

--g

I think sometimes people are afraid they will hurt your feelings if they even mention your weight .  I was such a blabbermouth that I have told every single person I know about my surgery, so since I brought it up they feel free to comment.  A few people that didn't know asked me if I was well, said they "hoped I was trying to lose weight" .  Then there are those who think you are"too thin" when you are still technically obese!

Anne

I think it was around 50lbs when folks started asking me if I had lost weight.  I was not private but didn't just go up to folks and say, hi, I just had WLS.  It was pretty amazing how long it took some.  And there were those who ask if I was trying (like do you have cancer or are you trying to lose weight?)

It's just so strange to me.  I don't think anyone in my group is afraid to say anything.  Especially not my family. My sister and I both have battled our weight (together and separately) a great deal over the years. We've joined Weigh****chers together at least 5 times in my lifetime.  My husband says with her it's jealousy but I don't know she really acts like she can't see it.

 I should clarify that a few weeks ago my parents started commenting and went on and on and on about it.  But even now none of my 4 siblings have commented on seeing any difference.   So far I am not losing any hair and my best friends tells me every single time she sees me how radiant my skin looks and how much younger I look.  So, unless she's really just making stuff up I don't think I look at all illl.  

One of things that people aren't seeing with me is my clothes hanging off me.  I have at this point a whole closet full of clothes that I wore before when I first starting gaining my weight back from the Band, so maybe that has something to do with it.  If I were still wearing the clothes I was wearing pre-surgery it would be a lot more obvious I guess. 

I had some of the same situations you mentioned.  I lost 130 lbs and my stepdaughter never said a word.  I think she was jealous.  Some other people really noticed.  I lied and never told anyone.  I am not proud of that.  Living a lie is hard.  Now, nine years later, I wish I had told.  I was afraid of failure.  I did not know enough about the surgery and was afraid I would not lose.  Just thought I would share that bit to let you know my thoughts.  I wish I could talk about my surgery but have lied so long,  I can not admit to it now.

People will notice soon and you will enjoy the attention.  Now I miss all the good comments.  Hang in there, you are in the honeymoon time of the surgery.  Enjoy it--it will not last forever.  I would love to have that 'high' again.       

Just this week a few people have asked me if I was losing weight. They were the first, very few people have noticed at all! I think people don't really pay much attention to others:)

As of this past Monday , I have lost 89 lbs and people (besides my family and select friends who know I had surgery) just started noticing this week.  I started at 360 and now 271.  Seems crazy, but I also agree with others that some people are just uncomfortable commenting on anything having to do with weight.

After so many ups and downs in my weight over the years, my husband and family are very hesitant to say much about my weight. Whether it is going down or up :)