Good morning. Quickie

Not that kind of quickie!  Quick question. You know you've see folks ask if people treat you differently once you lose the excess weight--do you treat people differently now that you have lost or are losing your weight?
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I find that I meet peoples' eyes when walking pass them, smiling more and greeting them. I have more confidence so I'm likely to speak my mind more often.

--g

I think I was pretty forward before, fat and all.  I have never much been the retiring type.

I did have a discussion with a friend at the Pleasure Driving Show.  Last time I saw her, she was excited because she had been to an into meeting about WLS.  She is several hundred pounds overweight and has lost over 100 several times since I have known her, only to gain it back and maybe more.  She cried while telling me her insurance wouldn't cover the surgery and there was no other way for her to get it.  I was so sorry for her and didn't know what to say.  I couldn't lie and say it was ok, she could do it on her own.  She has worked for that company for 11 yrs, has no higher education and is pretty happy to have a job period.  It really is depressing because her health is suffering because of the weight and it isn't going to get any better without surgery.

 Yes, people treat ME differently.  They'll look me in the eye, smile, acknowledge me, hold doors, etc.  I didn't realize I was invisible before.  I've always been a tad outgoing... and never really had a problem talking to people - but, now I'm more confident.  But, like you, I look other people in the eye too.  It's a lot easier when they have a smile in them.  But I don't think I discriminate who I smile at, unless it's some creepy man with no teeth following me around .   

But I've also found, even after losing weight, people treat you different under different cir****tances.

I as in a fairly nice store - between a Penneys and Macy's.  I had on dress clothes, a real nice leather coat, etc and this lady in a fur struck up a conversation with me.  The next day I showed up in blue jeans, a pea coat and tennis shoes and I was hardly acknowledged by anyone there.. AND I was thin.   I find even the sales staff treat you different.  

Weight or no weight, if someone wants to find a reason to "label"  you - they will.

Yes , I am different . I am not afraid to go out in public or family events anymore. I wear clothes and not sweats all the time. For people treating me different ... I'm not sure , but I wear the same shirts and same clothes as last year and I get comments nearly daily how good I look in this or that or a color. Hmmpf same stuff I wore last year, must just look better now. I know my boyfriends family was surprised at how good I looked at our last event ( last weekend) . they told me I looked great and have always been nice I guess. That felt good , their eyes when they saw me was fantastic! Wait till they see me in June when I'm at goal!

 
I have noticed that I have doors held for me A LOT more often now, and people are much "nicer" and "chattier" than before I lost weight.  

I have even had men to tell me to go ahead of them in the checkout line when they have the same number (or close to it) of items that I have  what?!?!?!?. . . .it's strange trying to adjust to the changes in  people's behavior, and I don't see that I am doing anything different.  

I think I was friendlier before and I seldom volunteer anymore.  I always felt I had to be really friendly and volunteer for things so I would feel involved.  I guess I had the " never wanted to be the last one picked" syndrome.

One thing that did surprise me was my DH's friends.  They were always super nice to me and I always felt like they did it for DH and probably felt sorry for him but they haven't changed one bit.  They tease and talk to me the same as they did before. My weight never bothered my DH and I think that came across to them.

I don't know if people are treating me different because I am much more confident now.  I do talk more and probably look people in the eye more  I'm still shy, but not nearly as bad I as I was before WLS. 

I also speak my mind more,  I don't feel I have the need to please everyone so they will like me....

Linda

I was confident and outgoing before. But apparently I was also invisible to some people. So now I act the same but it takes a lot less work and energy to get a response back.

So I smile at people out in public like I did before but now more of them smile back. And more hold doors open for me too. Not having to fight for the attention means I can put that energy towards other things.

I am grumpier than I used to be but I think that's the post-concussion syndrome and not being able to work out combined with my job situation.