Good Morning. Fear does funny things to people's attitudes

I've been thinking about our society's free-for-all in bashing fat people and wondering if part of it is due to fear that it will happen to them. I think many are in denial but there in the back of their minds is a fear of becoming fat. So they scorn fat and people who are fat, and try to place blame. Do you wonder why prejudice against the obese is one of the last socially acceptable prejudices? What do you think is the root cause?

--gina
   

I'm not sure its because they are worried they'll become fat - I think people just see it as an issue that others can control "if they just didn't eat as much". 

I made the comment to a friend awhile ago that I don't have a problem now eating a treat in front others anymore.  Before I was worried they were thinking "if she didn't eat that, she wouldn't be so fat"... now they really don't have a lot they can say about it. 

I think they scorn fat people because its like bullying in school - its an easy target.  Those that do it usually are not empathetic, don't have an open mind and aren't educated about the reasons why people are fat.  Yes, we can control what we eat - but we've found in many cases that we don't necessarily have the metabolism others have to be able to eat like a "normal" person and not gain weight.  I find the ones who do judge are ones who never have had a weight issue and eat just like we do.

 I think the misconception that obesity is primarily a life style choice (laziness, poor eating habits, gluttony, etc) leads the prejudice.  The more we, as a society and more particularly the medical community, learns about obesity we may see these attitudes change.  My dr told me that just within the last 10-20 years enzymes and hormones that control hunger and satiety have been discovered.  Many obese people have abnormal levels of these substances.  Obesity is a multifactorial issue.  We need to learn more about it and maybe then, with education, we will see attitude changes.

Gina -

Very interesting concept. I had not thought of that at all. It could be people are afraid they may be looking in the mirror. I also think it is sad that the misconception that we are lazy, sloppy, just need to eat healthy and exercise, and perhaps not too smart is horrible.

I also think that the emphasis for "thinness and beauty" and anything else is not as good, plays into it a lot too. I remember when Oprah lost a lot of weight one time,and I was surprised watching her shows how (she even later admitted) how arrogant she had become when she was thinner talking about her weight loss. Later, she felt shame by regaining a lot of the weight back. As a mother to girls (they are grown now) I always worried that they would struggle with weight as I did my whole life, and then I worried that they would want to be too thin like the celebrities (my oldest daughter was almost borderline anorexic her first year in college thankfully she is not now).

Also, in my post earlier this week - many people commented on people's self-confidence increases when they lose weight. I think it is sad that we buy into that ourselves, that somehow we are not "good enough" for ourselves or others. I know I did not think I was good enough as others and would shy away from others.

I do think it is so sad. Like I said in my earlier post - when I have looked back on my own journey, it has really hurt. I am the same person, maybe I do have more confidence now, but I am the same person.

Thanks for the interesting concept!

I think fear has something to do with it. I know I am a little fearful of my DD, although she has great eating and exercise habits and is a great weight.  We don't know or understand what it takes for some of them to remain thin.  We know eating right didn't help us.  Will power wasn't very helpful.  I feel lucky that I was pretty accepted in my world, either fat or thin.  But I also never hid behind my weight. 

I think most people think it is something that can be controlled and we just make a choice to eat whatever and be fat...  Even DH used to tell me to push away from the table and exercise more and I could lose weight.  He is seeing now that it is not quite that easy!!  Well yes, I could lose weight, I just couldn't keep it off and then before WLS my metabolism was so shot I could not even lose weight anymore.

I think of it like smoking now.  My kids both smoke and it upsets me because I've done that and I do remember how hard it is to stop, but I still get so aggravated with them and tell them to just put them down and stop doing it - like it was really easy and I know it was not that easy.

Have you noticed how many more TV shows revolve around weight loss?  There are a lot of them on now.  Some of them really show the struggle people have to go through, of course there are the ones that don't show the real struggle.  I think it is becoming a much more open topic than it used to be.

Gotta travel today so I'm off to ride around for 4-5 hours!!  Everyone have a great day.

Linda

Good thought, Gina.

The others are right...it is SAFE to bash fat people because most normal weight people see it as a lifestyle/choice issue...much the same that diabetes is also blamed on lifestyle, even type II.

If they would just not eat so much
If they cut their fat
If they didn't eat sweets
If they just ate like normal people and not at MickyD's

The IF's are numerous and all are just an excuse to not understand the real problem.

That is one reason that billions are spent in the diet industy....to avoid being fat.

Liz

 I actually gave a speech on Fat-The Last Acceptable Prejudice a few years ago.  Remember that fat is not considered bad in many societies and was once a sign of wealth. Our media has to take some of the blame.  When the only images of "beauty" that people are subjected to are 14 year old waifs dressed up to look like 25 year old sexpots, it's no wonder our self-images get screwed up.

At the same time that obesity rates have risen, so have rates of other eating disorders like anorexia.

But I also think there is a false assumption that many fat people are slovenly.  At my heaviest I always tried to dress well, but I admit I let make-up go (whether to keep from drawing attention or thinking what was the point-I'm not sure.  When I gave the speech, I brought along two different outfits.  One was basically a jersey muu-muu, the other was a stylish business suit.  Before I began the speech I asked the audience which outfit projected confidence and success to them.  As you might expect, they all chose the business suit.  Mind you, both outfits were in identical sizes.

I'm with Gina on this one.  There are many reasons for the prejudice, but obesity has been reviled so much in the press that I think everyone is basically fearful that it could happen to them.

Janet

Great question.
I think theres alot of layers and factors that go into this. Especially with the media always showing these skin and bone models and actresses.
I also think that people see this as more of a lifestyle choice than a disease.
People will always discriminate against whats different, but obesity is an epidemic, so there will be more obese people than thin in the near future if we arent careful.
Fast food is cheap and abundant 24/7. Soda and sugar is every where too. We are creating a generation hooked on junk food.
How about kids not playing outside as much anymore, computer games, handheld games. I really have to take things away from my boys in the summer and get out with them some days to get them going.
I am sure there's more but I will stop there.