My first support group meeting last night...

So last night I went to my first support group meeting at Kaiser. There was about 40 people there.  I wasn't sure what to expect but I was excited to attend.  The entire meeting consisted of each person introducing themselves and telling us what type of surgery they had, when, how much weight they lost and share any information that might be helpful.  I was so depressed when I left there and had to shake it off before I got home to DH.  Several people had had surgery within a week of me and they had lost twice as much weight.  I know in my head that I should not compare myself with others, but I did, and it was a big mistake.  I should have put my fingers in my ears and said, "LALALALALA".  I am going to try a different support group and maybe it will have a different format.  I do like to hear about other peoples journey's but it was 1 1/2 of the same thing over and over.  Is that what most support groups do?  I've got 2 other options of different groups so I think I'll check them all out and then decide which one is right for me.

Sorry it's so long.
Elizabeth

I think they all will do that roll call from time to time. I just tell folks I started as a lightweight and only lost x pounds this month or whatever. We are lightweights and have a lot less to lose than heavier folks. We are also unique each to ourselves. Some take off like a rocket and sputter out, some go slow and steady, and some start out slow and take off later. Some lose in steps and some lose in a straight line...

--gina

Elizabeth,

I feek for you!  At my last support group the woman next to me who had surgery more than 2 months AFTER me was ckearly much smaller than me.  I told her she had done great and she said well I have been very compliant.  I replied, so have I!!!  She didn't mean it any sort of mean way but it is hard to NOT compare yourself with others. Remember though that this OUR individual journey and try to not compare.  I KNOW this....I would not be at my current weight without this surgery, I would NOT be training for a 5K and I would NOT feel that I am finally somewhat of a "normal" size now.

Blessings to you and hang in there!

~~Jennifer

p.s those that have much more to lose will lose larger amounts fast....remember this as well.  Some who were very large would love to have their goal weight just below where you are now....t

Jennifer,
Thanks for the pep talk.

Elizabeth

Elizabeth,
I hope you can find a support group you are comfortable at and like.  Mine is 4 hours away so I've only attended one meeting.  Sometimes I wi**** was closer and I could go to a few more - probably not every month.  I get all of my support on this website which is great, but sometimes it would be nice to get to be around a group that had experience the same things.  The one meeting I went to was a tasting party and we all took food and recipes.  I did come away with some great receipes!!

Like the others have said, try not to compare to other people because we are all so different. 

Good luck.

Linda

I bet those guys all have a lot more to lose than you.

They really should report their weight loss as a percentage of excess weight because that's what counts.

For example:

I have to lose 200 pounds. You have to lose 100. The first month I lose 15 pound and you lose 10. Ha, ha, I'm losing faster than you, right! Um, no. I have lost 7.5% of my excess weight. But you have lost 10% of yours. YOU are losing faster than ME!

Lightweights may report less absolute pounds lost per month but we often lose faster and get to goal faster and more often than heavyweights.

Mac,
Thanks for you insight.  I agree percentages would make it more fair.  But it would propably take a lot longer for people to calculate their percentage without a calculator and the meeting would have lasted until 10pm LOL.  Thanks for taking the time to respond to my post.
Elizabeth

Elizabeth, don't worry.  I would try some other meetings but you are doing great and will probably be at goal before those others who seem to be losing faster. 

My support group is 1.5 hr away and I don't go.  I have been to the Asheville one but only a few times.  It has everyone, pre and post surgery and seems geared to the pre-surgery folks, which I understand.  My group splits them.  Like others, I get most of my support from here.

Hi Elizabeth!

i seldom go to support group meetings.  i'm 50 miles away but when i do go i just don't feel like i belong.  there's lots of folks that just talk about the things they