I feel so much better now!

 I have been feeling so depressed lately. I'm over 2 weeks out and I still can't move past full liquids. I still can't take in enough fluids to stay hydrated, and trying to get enough protein orally? Forget about it. Thank goodness for the feeding tube. I honestly felt like I was failing. I was so discouraged.

Well, today I had to go back to my Dr's about the feeding tube infection and losing the stitch that was keeping it from coming out. The Dr changed one of my antibiotics and put in a new stitch (not the most pleasant thing I've ever had done!). After wards, the doc came in and had a little sit down with me. I told him what was going on inside my head and that I didn't think it was going to be like this. He said that he DID expect it to be this way! He said that I am right on track as far as he was concerned. He said where most people will heal up enough to feel better in a month, I'll probably take 8 weeks. Maybe a little more.He also told me that using the g-tube isn't a failure. According to him it's a smart way to get what I need to heal while I'm healing.

I feel so much better now that I know I'm not "behind" where I should be at this stage. I can give myself a break and just let the healing happen without pushing!!!  I'm still feeling crappy and I'm still exhausted, but the only difference now is that I know it's ok to feel crappy and tired!!How freeing is that!?!  Oh and if it's ok to still feel this way then I know it will eventually get better!!!

Thanks for the support!! You guys are awesome!!!

PS I've lost 14 pounds in 16 days!!! Way too cool!!!

I'm glad you're feeling better emotionally about where you are. You've been through a lot! But, all this will be behind you soon and you'll look back and see it as a small hurdle. Hang tough, sweetie. We got your back.

--gina

It will all come together just have a little patience. Oh and FYI, I popped a danged stitch too, was very painful.. Im swinging every day for you.

some times you just need permission to feel bad and know it will still get better.  You have permission.  Glad your Dr is kind and concerned about you.  Hopefully the new antibiotic will be wonderful for you and get you all fixed up.

It can be SO hard not to compare ourselves to others, but dang it, we're all different... and, like I've heard said, "It's not a race!  It's a marathon..."  :-)

You are a special case and your recovery is different than anybody else's.  I'm so glad your Dr. helped that point get across so you could embrace it.

Big hugs cuz you are doing GREAT!

:-)

14 lbs in 16 days is fantastic!

And you are doing great - I haven't had all the complications you have had, but still have a very hard time getting hydrated. So keep positive attitude going, and you'll achieve your goals.

Take care

i'm so very sorry you're going through this....and i'm so very sorry you've had complications....but i'm also so very happy that you're feeling better emotionally.  don't ever feel as if you're "behind" anything or anyone!  this is YOUR race and nobody else's!  comparing your journey to someone else's is like playing baseball on a football field (and trying to make it work...ie....you can't play baseball without bases or a pitcher's mound...and you can't play football on a baseball field...a baseball field don't have goal lines).....it just don't fit!  my prayer for you is that you won't even think about comparisons!  praying that it will never enter your mind again!!  celebrate YOU today!  celebrate that as of this morning you are a day closer to feeling better....you made it another day in your journey.....you're one day closer to having the feeding tube out....you're one day closer to healing....you're one day closer to a smaller size.....you're one day closer to __________(fill in the blank)

just praying that you will totally celebrate YOU today!!!!  just between you and me....when you have those negative thoughts....i bet if you think about it.....you will be able to think of at least 10 blessings in your life for each negative thought!!!

very best wishes to you!!!  praying you will get better really soon!!

I'm glad you're doing better.  I've been worried about you.  Funny how watching your posts on-line has me vested in your outcome.

Having the right mental state will help the healing process.  I think you are pretty lucky that your doctor helped you with the right perspective and realistic expectations.  You've had a tough journey so far.  I hope is gets better fast.

Kay

Great report from your Dr! At two weeks I struggled with liquids, too. I still have to plan when to drink now. So happy you are feeling better after visiting your Dr!!!

Meg

Glad you got the reassurance you needed!

It is also good to hear you sounding so much better!

Keep up the good work and keep posting! We are here for you!