feels like i'm poisoning myself

Well, it's definitely not the nurse you talked to. LOL 

At that level, they are parroting back what they are told to say. She may really believe it or she may not but has to say it anyway. Also, they are used to patients with a lot more weight to lose calling them because drinking shakes all day is unpleasant. So they may not even hear what you are actually saying but are just responding to what they think you are saying.

I also have found that, just because you work in the bariatrics field, doesn't mean you don't hate fat people. And, if you hate fat people and work in the field, you get to implement all your fat prejudices as policy! Like one of the programs around here. You have to lose 10% of your body weight before they will do the surgery (which is not supported by clinical data and not required by most insurances) and they have actually turned people away the morning of surgery because they weigh them and they are .5 pounds short. Keep in mind that they weigh them at the hospital and so it's not even the same scale as the one they weighed them with at the surgical consult. So they have the OR all prepped, everyone scheduled, and they won't do the surgery because of a .5 pound discrepancy. Crazy!

 WOW!  i have NO words.  the world is crazy!

i have a hard time talking to people,  thats just who i am and how i was made.  advocating for myself is painful.  especially when i dont have a lot of information at my disposal, or a lot of different information.  i guess thats where i'm at today.

i really appreciate your reply.

I understand about not wanting to advocate. I was raised to be a "good" girl and somehow I equate standing up for myself as being rude and asking for what I want as being high maintenance (also rude). I remember the scene in "When Harry Met Sally" where she's ordering at the restaurant with five million substitutions and special requests and I think "I never want to be that girl."

But a lot of that changed for me when I had surgery. When I went out to eat post-op and was still on liquids, it wasn't a matter of preference. It was life or death to have the food I needed. So I would do things like order a glass of milk and make a protein shake in my Blender Bottle right at the table. And... much to my shock... the world didn't spin off its axis or anything. LOL I discovered a real truth: restaurants and other businesses want our business and are willing and even eager to accomodate reasonable requests.

I have now started doing things like asking if I can have a discount if the dress I want to buy has a flaw and ordering substitutions at restaurants with aplomb! LOL

Anyway, I figure, when it comes to my health care, I am a partner with my doctor. Sure, they are the expert on medical matters. But I am the expert on ME. They need that critical information and, ultimately, everything is my decision. So I ask away if I have questions and and sometimes I even don't take their advice if I think they are off-base.

 you are very insightful!  thank you for sharing this, and i will have to think about how to be able to ask questions in a way that wont offend people, or to deal with them if i happen to offend them!  i have family that are very harsh, and i was always the one who unruffled peoples feathers.  always the good one, always in the middle of the problem, trying to make it all right for everyone--- but myself.  i think a lot of us may be that way!

 i never learned to be able to have my way, and the people in my family who always got their way did it by running over the little people.  i am very sensitive to others feelings and have a very sensitive soul.  so, learning to ask questions about a doctors care, or firing my nutritionist as my mother suggests, well, it's pretty scary to me.  but, i think it's time for me to learn another good skill!

We were on 5 Optifast shakes a day plus one small food meal.  It was boring but otherwise ok.  There were folks who had problems the first few days but after the 4th day, everyone was in the groove.  We could have all the celery and cucumbers we wanted.  They absoluely can't hurt you as long as you follow whatever your rules are the day before surgery.  We had only clear liquids then, no shakes, etc.

 it really amazes me how different the requirements are for each surgeon!  nice to know that certain things wont hurt me, if i need some extra source of food.

You know the that CIB stand for "crap in a box", right? Get yourself some decent protein powder from VitaminShoppe. Syntrax Nectars like Strawberry Mousse or Chocolate Truffle are pretty good if you liked Nestles Quick as a kid. But really, MacMadame is right, there's nothing magic about protein in liquid form and LWs really don't have a huge fatty liver like SMO folks. Take it easy and use some common sense. Surgeons and medical folks have almost zero training in nutrition and even less in nutrition post WLS. They're reading from a script that's about 15 years old and was all theory then and worse now. 

--gina
 

 thanks, gina!  i'm bringing back the cib and the broth that has MSG in it today.  i called my mother and she brought me some soy protein powder- big bucks, but all she could find around here- and some real healthy broth from our local farm.  the broth was heaven, the powder, not so much.  i'm taking 1/2 a scoop instead of a full one.  i was gagging, big time!  i'll just keep gagging it down, though.  i have some samples of synthrax, but am waiting till post op to try them.

hugs.

Are you getting pleant of fluids in addition to the ones you use to make your shakes. You need MINIMUM of 64 oz a day right now. Dehydration can give you a killer headache. Hang in there ;it shouldn't be but about 3-4 days before you get detoxed and start feeling better.

And hey,if you have to stay in bed all day for 3 days,just getting up to eat and drink,well,there are worse things to do,right?
GL,
Holly

 LOL, holly, amen!

yeah, i've been drinking and having sugar free pops and broth.  the headache is calming down today, and i think i can do a few hours of work, maybe.

thanks for the reply!