well I think we're going to lose house DESPITE the commitment letter

 This futile house quest (  and this marriage )  has been a 10 month long ordeal .  This time I think its the sellers real estate agent thats screwing the whole thing up  ..probably because Ive confided  in her like  a friend  ( never imagining she had another buyer in the wings  shed favor ) about my husband's frustrating squirrelly behavior  around the loan .  

I guess  she like me expects him to jump left when he is expected to jump right  before closing  or something as he has done in the past  ... can't exactly BLAME her  ...

We've been turned down for a loan TWICE .  He failed to pay his   mortgage  right before commitment papers were being issued once (  WHO DOES  that ?!  ).  

Though part of me  says  I ve devoted a YEAR of my life to this  and  sacrificed so many other viable  projects of my own to make this happen (  more fool me )  - and REALLY want to see SOME REWARD  ... honestly  part of me says ...  if this guy  is this much of a financial fool ..

Ure so much better  getting away  ...  because he will  ALWAYS be a fool ... lol.

I got  married to him on the erroneous belief that he needed me and would appreciate my help .  

Instead he  USED me and lied to me every  step of the way .  He refused to change his  financially self destructive ways even a bit  .  He refuses to  protect me from his nasty son or  get him out of the house .  

So really  there  is absolutely nothing in this relation ship I want  or need .  

i really  hate  to see such WASTE ...  heres a guy with  so  mu*****ome throwing it away ..  a widowed Father  with assets  and health issues who desperately needs a loving home with family who will probably end up in an institution  along with his savings wich will go for inheritance taxes  and  5,000 a day  hospice  fees ...  ... but this is a song  sung all over America.  

Meanwhie I a poor artist would KILL  for a garden of my own  .. but I cant get a loan to save my life

The thing  that really rankles  is ive SAVED this deal over and over  and over again and hes screwed it up over and over and over again ..as many times ....  and  each tie ive saved it its been on worse terms .   So  im  actually half glad  we dont have to go through with it because i was getting    honestly WORRIED   ... thi despite the fact that I'd bought the astronomical taxes down... 

everything .   I guess  its finally hitting  home that I deserve a lot better and maybe i dodged a real bullet having to LIVE   with this guy     .    No house  is worth my LIFE  ... and i swear ive aged ten years  in the last ten months  .. 

Oh, Ava,  So sorry you are dealing with this.  Sounds like you need to do some soul searching and figure out if you would be better or better off with out him.  The latter seems more likely.  I hope you find peace and love in your life. Hugs

Sheri

Sorry things are rough right now   :(       We are also in the process of buying a new home.  Im stressed to the max!!!!!     We havent had any problems as far as the financial side of things but we hit many glitches as far as the propety set backs, hooking up to the sewage, etc.   Hang in there.  If it was meant to be, it will happen.  Good luck!   Cindy

(((HUGS))) Ava!! 

You are putting up with all of this so you can have a garden of your own?  Get rid of this guy and his son, find yourself a cute little cottage (do they have those where you live) with just enough ground to have  the most beautiful garden (that's all yours!!!!). 

Between your landlord and this guy you have been miserable for awhile.  I think you are a strong enough woman to get out on your own and make ALL of your dreams come true.

If you lived close to me I'd let you plant an enormous garden!!!

 A window box and a room of your own....no air conditioner....no slob step son....
no irresponsible man....heaven...SEAVIEW

You are in such a stressful situation, Ava - I am so sorry. It is important that you keep your perspective and take a breath. If you don't love and respect this man, no garden or (false) sense of security is worth it. I sense you do care about him but it is not your job to rescue him. I advise you to figure out what you need to do to take care of yourself - that has to be the starting place. We are rooting for you!

Amy

Ava, so sorry you are going through all of this! It's so hard when we see the potential in people and they just can't live up to who they can be. Trying to change people rarely works. I hope you make a decision that brings you so much happiness you will burst!!

(((hugs)))
[[[HUGS]]]
{{{HUGS}}}

Sorry you are going through this time in the barrel. Life sucks sometimes. 
You deserve to be happy.  Pursue YOUR happyness Ava, not someone else's!!!

tracey

this seems to be taking way too much emotional energy with no real hope of it getting better.  So you get the house and then are stuck in debt with this turkey who isn't even paying his bills?  Doesn't matter how much $$$ he has if he isn't responsible with it. 

You do deserve better.

 I read your posts, because you are strong and opinionated. To read that you are unhappy reminds me that you can move on. Between your landlord and the new husband, it appears that you are surrounded by negativity.

I am sure you are young. If you stay in a bad situation with hopes it will get better, it won't. All we can change is our own self and our reactions to others. 

My opinion is that you deserve better. I have been divorced and alone a long time and it is always better than a crappy relationship.

Take care of Ava and her needs. The plants will thank you.