Your not fat enough
Generic User_Name
on 5/23/11 9:33 pm, edited 5/23/11 9:42 pm
on 5/23/11 9:33 pm, edited 5/23/11 9:42 pm
I am the husband that Southernlady spoke of. At my heaviest, I weighed 281 and I am 5'9".
I had a DS on 12/16/10 and I weigh 178.
As far as handling people with objections, I agree with others who didn't tell anyone. You are doing this for your health, not theirs.
Best of luck to you.
Charles
I had a DS on 12/16/10 and I weigh 178.
As far as handling people with objections, I agree with others who didn't tell anyone. You are doing this for your health, not theirs.
Best of luck to you.
Charles
after i shared with a friend that i knew would support me and got lots of negativity i decided to tell only on a need to know basis. i told my hubby, my son, my boss and 1 co-worker. i think the decisions i make regarding my health are very personal and private decisions and i choose to not share that information whether it's WLS or a sinus infection. i just didn't need to deal with all the negative comments and chose to side step the issue!
best wishes to you!
best wishes to you!
Blessings, J
HW 250.4/SW 238/1ST GOAL 155/2ND GOAL 150/CW 143.6
HW 250.4/SW 238/1ST GOAL 155/2ND GOAL 150/CW 143.6
Before my surgery, I got the "your not that big" comment all the time. My response was, "yes, I am that big!" However, I didn't argue with anyone about it. I wanted my DH and my DSs to be there for me, but I did not try to get anyone else on board. My DH was there 100% and so were my boys (who are grown and out of the house). I let people say what they wanted and did not try to rationalize with them. My decision was made and we'd live with it.
My DH said that my height, 5'7" and my clothing really camouflaged my size. My clothes did not hide my high cholesterol, high blood sugar, high blood pressure, or my sleep apnea from my doctor.
I didn't tell many people I was having surgery. Mostly so I didn't have to hear the dissenting opinions. I've been very open since having surgery. To the naysayers: my health is better. I feel and look better.
I am not at goal. I've not lost a pound in the last month. I'm 80+pound lighter and in a much better place in my life. Surgery was worth it to me!
Kay
My DH said that my height, 5'7" and my clothing really camouflaged my size. My clothes did not hide my high cholesterol, high blood sugar, high blood pressure, or my sleep apnea from my doctor.
I didn't tell many people I was having surgery. Mostly so I didn't have to hear the dissenting opinions. I've been very open since having surgery. To the naysayers: my health is better. I feel and look better.
I am not at goal. I've not lost a pound in the last month. I'm 80+pound lighter and in a much better place in my life. Surgery was worth it to me!
Kay
My endocrinologist told me i wasn't fat enough, but i needed to lose weight.
I went to the information seminar anyway. Found out I would easily qualify, I told my endo two months before surgery (he had to be made aware or my surgeon would not do it). he still didn't think i was big enough but didn't try to stop me.
I also did not want to hear the horror stories pre-op. I told some people who needed to know (missed a couple because I was afraid of telling too many people and jinxing myself). Told people I was taking 2 weeks vacation at the end of July. Came back with I had my gall bladder removed (true). The other story I had was I was having surgery to fix my gastric paresis (also true).
Now I tell the truth. People want to know how the weight came off. So I tell them, I had stomach surgery, I eat small meals, I exercise daily, I keep my carbs low and I document what I eat. I do what everyone says to do, I just had a little help to stay on track. RNY took the major obstacle out of my way. I could not balance blood sugar, insulin, exercise, and diet. Take away the diabetes the rest became easy. I also has gastric paresis and now without a pyloric valve this is cured, so is my obesity.
Telling others about your very personal decision is something only you can decide. Just know you should be armed with facts adn be preapred for the negative. Try to educate them if they are open, offer to take them to a class or support group. When people say you aren't big enough, tell them that your doctor disagrees but if they will show you their medical degree, you'll certainly consider their opinon.
I went to the information seminar anyway. Found out I would easily qualify, I told my endo two months before surgery (he had to be made aware or my surgeon would not do it). he still didn't think i was big enough but didn't try to stop me.
I also did not want to hear the horror stories pre-op. I told some people who needed to know (missed a couple because I was afraid of telling too many people and jinxing myself). Told people I was taking 2 weeks vacation at the end of July. Came back with I had my gall bladder removed (true). The other story I had was I was having surgery to fix my gastric paresis (also true).
Now I tell the truth. People want to know how the weight came off. So I tell them, I had stomach surgery, I eat small meals, I exercise daily, I keep my carbs low and I document what I eat. I do what everyone says to do, I just had a little help to stay on track. RNY took the major obstacle out of my way. I could not balance blood sugar, insulin, exercise, and diet. Take away the diabetes the rest became easy. I also has gastric paresis and now without a pyloric valve this is cured, so is my obesity.
Telling others about your very personal decision is something only you can decide. Just know you should be armed with facts adn be preapred for the negative. Try to educate them if they are open, offer to take them to a class or support group. When people say you aren't big enough, tell them that your doctor disagrees but if they will show you their medical degree, you'll certainly consider their opinon.
7/18/10: 211lbs, 10/16/10: 174 lbs, 1/21/11: 146 lbs, 4/20/11: 131 lbs. Insulin FREE since 7/2010, "normal" BMI since 12/2010. I'm 31, 5'5", happily married, with a fabulous 3 year old boy, and hope to add to our family in the near future 
I'm so glad to hear someone who has told a lot of ppl. I'm still pre-surgery. But I'm a very open person and have a lot of supportive friends. A few of these friends I work with...so it's going to get out. I don't want to hide it or be evasive in any way. I feel I should embrace my decision. Being open about it is what feels right for me. (yet I completely support those who don't wanna tell....I sorta wish I could do that---but I can't. I talk too much!)
I suppose I just need to prepare myself for the negative reactions. Ignoring them seems right. I don't think I'll be changing any minds. And I don't think it's my job to. They don't deserve my time or energy.
I suppose I just need to prepare myself for the negative reactions. Ignoring them seems right. I don't think I'll be changing any minds. And I don't think it's my job to. They don't deserve my time or energy.
I have decided that *everyone* must "carry their weight well" because no one ever believes them when they say what they weigh. 
Anyway, I didn't tell a lot of people until I had a date and announced I was taking medical leave at work. I figured there would be people who would spend a lot of energy trying to talk me out of it and I didn't want to deal with them all.
Once I did tell people, I told them in such a way that there wasn't really room for argument.
Anyway, I didn't tell a lot of people until I had a date and announced I was taking medical leave at work. I figured there would be people who would spend a lot of energy trying to talk me out of it and I didn't want to deal with them all.
Once I did tell people, I told them in such a way that there wasn't really room for argument.
HW - 225 SW - 191 GW - 132 CW - 122
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I was told that by my family...mom, dad, and even husband although my husband did support me after I made the decision. I was 242 pounds (not my highest) and 5'5..morbidly obese. At one point I almost cancelled my appointment but I stuck with it..now looking back I wish I hadn't let it go to heart so much, I knew what I needed to do and that is all that should matter.
HW: 260? SW: 242 Surgeons GW: 150 First GW: 140 Second GW: 130 CW: 122 
There was a discussion about this on the Ontario forum a little while ago and this was my take...
I am also a private person, but I feel strongly that this surgery shouldn't be kept private (though I will probably wait to tell people until I've actually had the surgery this fall). Telling people that the weight loss is due to changes in eating habits and exercise is only partially true and feeds the misperception the public has that anyone can lose weight and keep it off if they really try. This surgery causes malabsorption and makes it possible for us to consume and be satisfied on tiny amounts of food. If someone tried the same diet without the surgery they would need superhuman restraint to stick with it and they would not see equivalent weight loss as they have normal absorption. I think it propagates the lie that anyone can be thin if they just try and encourages stigma and abuse towards fat people. The more WLS success stories there are, the better understood this process will be by the public at large and will help shift the mentality toward obesity being a medical issue for which surgical intervention is both appropriate and often necessary.
I am also a private person, but I feel strongly that this surgery shouldn't be kept private (though I will probably wait to tell people until I've actually had the surgery this fall). Telling people that the weight loss is due to changes in eating habits and exercise is only partially true and feeds the misperception the public has that anyone can lose weight and keep it off if they really try. This surgery causes malabsorption and makes it possible for us to consume and be satisfied on tiny amounts of food. If someone tried the same diet without the surgery they would need superhuman restraint to stick with it and they would not see equivalent weight loss as they have normal absorption. I think it propagates the lie that anyone can be thin if they just try and encourages stigma and abuse towards fat people. The more WLS success stories there are, the better understood this process will be by the public at large and will help shift the mentality toward obesity being a medical issue for which surgical intervention is both appropriate and often necessary.
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