Your not fat enough

Yep, that's what I was told today by a co-worker.  He seemed to think that unless your 500lbs that any WLS is not worth the risk.

A little about me, since this is my first post.  I'm 5'11" and 290 lbs .  It seems that I must carry it well because people don't believe me when I tell them what I weigh. I'm still at least three months away from a date but doing everything I can  to speed up the process.

How do, or did, you handle people that disagree with you about having WLS?

I honestly didn't tell folks who I knew would have issues with it. People who think it's the 'easy way out' or think I'm wasting my time or think that if I just tried harder I could lose the weight.

These people will never have to walk in your shoes. They will never deal with what you've dealt with.

This surgery is a very personal decision, much more personal then most people would think.

And as for those who verbally tell you you aren't heavy enough? Tell them to strap an extra 100lbs to their body and see how they like it.

Good luck!

Oh Kelly!!!!  Are you still having surgery tomarrow?  If so,  good luck and best wishes.

 The way I handled i was not  to  tell anybody .    I realized  just floating a few "trial balloons "   that 

most people had  a lot of  preconcieved  misconceptions about WLS  ..and I didn't need to hear them lol .

Yes i felt a bit lonely going in ..but I came here a lot ( especially to chat ) .   And i came here a LOT  ( liek all day every day ) in the weeks following my surgery .  

I needed support and i wasnt going to get it from my family or my colleagues or friends.  

I told one person who visited me in the hospital , tok me there and picked me up and  helped me when i got home.  THATS IT .

everyone else got a version of " i had hiatal hernia surgery "  

or Im eating  this way because im on a diet .... 

incidentally  , the  person i TOLD  ( the trial balloon- remember -  I just brazenly told later that she misunderstood me  and i was talking about HIATAL HERNIA  surgery of course .     I would NEVER  have WLS  !!  ( LOL )  )  that shut her up !!    dont be afraid to confuse em with b....s.. t  !!      


to quote that pesky commercial  ...  ITS YOUR BODY  And your gonna  do what you WANT to !! 

Think I might have to use the hiatal hernia surgery line, although it would be so much easier if WLS was better understood by "regular" people. It's almost like people think I should feel ashamed of myself or there is something wrong with WLS. It's very frustrating.

My wife is still on the fence about the whole thing. Think she's just afraid that something will go wrong, but so far has supported me in this quest.

Yep, tomorrow is my day!! I'm excited. My husband is still on the fence too. He actually didn't want to support me at first. Now he is much more supportive. He just needed some time to adjust and realize nothing between us was going to change.

Good luck!

Welcome to the lightweight board.

Why you have surgery is no ones business other than yours, your spouse, and your doctor. The rest of the world can take a flying leap. I'm glad your wife is on board even if she is concerned. That's normal.

How do/did we handle them...tell them, if you must explain, that your pcp feels otherwise. And then change the subject.

My husband, who is also a member here, is also a lightweight. At his heaviest, he weighed 285 and he's 5' 9.25". Just figured your BMI versus his and y'all were very close. He had a DS on the 16th of Dec and now weighs 178.

Anyway, just wanted to say hello and let you know you have friends here on your journey.

Liz

I work in a hospital setting that has a bariatrics program (although not the one I used).  As I lose weight quickly, it's pretty obvious to the staff what I must have done, so I have chosen not to hide the fact.  Even so, I can't tell you how many people have said that they are surprised I was heavy enough to qualify.  Luckily, it tends to be said in mild surprise and not condemnation.  Only one person ever said it was a bad choice, and that was the skinny 20-something year old trainer at my health club who was taking baseline measurements before surgery.  I just gave him 'the look' as my kids call it, and he didn't say anything else.  I'm actually looking forward to seeing him again in another month when I go back for more measurements at the 3 month mark!

I must have been really fat because no one told me I wasn't heavy enough. Actually at 4'11', I was fat, but not but about 100lbs overweight.  I like Kelly's comment about strapping on 100 lbs.  One of my first goals was to lose what a feed sack weighs, 50lbs, because I realized how heavy those things were and how I didn't need to be lugging that much around extra every day, every where.

Everyone waited with their horror stories until after my surgery.  Then I heard everyone failed surgeries, regains, etc.  I just tell them how lucky I was, what a good Dr I had, what a great program I'm in, etc. 

I told folks on basically a need to know basis.  My staff, my family who needed to know, close friends.  Otherwise, I just dropped off the map for a while and came back skinnier.

I didn't tell anyone but 1 friend and my husband and mom.  Everyone thought i was having hernia surgery. I was back to work in 3 days.  I wore my baggy clothes for a while and gradually showed my Weight loss.  In fact my brother did not know until i was 1 year out.  I only wanted to tell those that would be supportive and that is what I did.  To this day I have not told my best friend.  I do not want to burden others with "my secret" Although she did ask one day and I laughed off with a "are you crazy" comment.  You have to do what is right for your situation. I thin there are 2 other ladies at work that had WLS the same time is me as well.  As we all seemed to drop the weight quickly but non of us will admit it to each other.

I got that your not fat enough comment form my mother in law who was very negative about the whole thing.  Thankfully she lives 6 hrs away cause she told Everyone she knows. My secret might get out one day here at home and if it does, I will simply say it was a personal decision that I wanted to be kept private and that is why I did not share it with others. 

Good luck in your journey.

Sheri