Accountability-my turn to be honest

Okay--I really am a slow loser but I think I am tryiing to make things difficult for myself.  Every time I read someone else's accomplishments (NSV or SV)  I think I will never attain that.  Lo and behold,  I am seeing so much success.  I have never lost more than 30 before.  Now I am down 60 an actually do go to the gym.  BUT....
I don't dump and have noticed that I seem to be tempting fate a lot lately.  Slider foods, ice cream, etc.  I have even binged on ice cream to the point of almost dumping.  I'm not sure if I am deliberately sabotaging, or trying to prove that it won't  work for me or what.  I also notice I am doing it more as people have complimented me on the weight loss.  As if, in a perverted way, I am showing them this is as far as I will go.
Vent over---I have never admitted any of this to anyone so maybe now that it is out in the open I can stop  AM I ALONE  or has anyone else done this too?
Janet

I've seen folks self sabotage, yes, so you are not alone. It's fear of the unknown in some cases.

Try to get all the sugar crap out of your house and if you need to eat ice cream, have some CarbSmart by Breyers. Go back to low carbing--Lee can help you with that. Lose as much as you can as fast as you can. Forget the balanced diet junk NUTs try to preach. We are fighting a disease here not a lazy way of life. We aren't normal. We are obese on the inside and out, and our bodies don't react to food the same way as normal people. Take charge and use that "tool" babeee!

--gina

 Thanks Gina,

I have FINALLY gotten my husband to agree to keep ice cream out of the house.  If it isn't here I don't miss it, if it is here, I can't control it.  thank goodness he finally gets it.
Janet

You are SO not alone!  I am not always the poster child for clean eating.....I am a boredom eater and if I don't keep myself busy I can eat quite a few BLT's (bites, licks, and tastes)!  I'm a carb eater and I've had to find ways to get some into my diet or I'll go crazy and won't be able to let this surgery do it's job!

I agree with Gina....keep your house as "clean" as possible!  I keep lots of cheese, nuts, 100 calorie popcorn, fruit, whole grain crackers,  etc.  For "junk" I keep some sugar free Russell Stouffer's chocolate candy, sugar free ice cream, and a few other acceptable yummies!  I DO eat some no-no's but I don't eat them in my house....I treat myself when I'm out at special occasions (a bite of birthday cake at a celebration,  a bite of my daughter's pasta if we are out at dinner...(we don't eat out much)  Last Saturday, my daughter and I went shopping and I got a fat free, sugar free latte at Starbucks AND a petite vanilla scone.....the lesser of a lot of evils but a treat none-the-less. I used to get 2 soft pretzels at the mall..you know, the kind dripping with butter!!

I also pack a mini-cooler of food with me and take it to work and in the car whereever I go.  I ALWAYS have good choices (and some yummy ones) to thwart off any tempts of bingeing, fast food, or sabetage.  It's worked for me so far. 

When all else fails and you are tempted by junk---eat some dense protein first!  If I eat some cheese or a boiled egg, there is no room for anything else and it will hold me over until my meal.

Hang in there...focus on what you are doing RIGHT and the rest will fall into place!  You are NOT alone....you can do this! 

 Thanks for the support.  I'm really not supposed to have ANY carbs yet on my plan (not until I lose 75% of the excess weight) But, like you, that's not going to happen so I try to keep healthier choices in the pantry.  I like Genisoy cheddar soy crisps.  If the crap isn't in the house, I find them pretty satisfying.  And I do keep a cooler in the car with the healthy stuff.  I think I will boil up some eggs tonight.  I can't imagine wanting much else after eating one.   Great suggestion.
Janet

Peyton Ure already at 138 !! wow ! U have to get a new avatar GRRL ... I'd love to see a pic of the ( I'm sure stunning ) new U ....

As far as the self - sabotage goes ... I think we all do it and its really scary because I know so many wonderful people who have regained a huge percentage of their weight or never lost in the first place due to unwillingness to put down the slider foods ... ice cream and fast foods being the two CHIEF culprit s that I've heard mentioned .

The thing is as Gina said our empty fat cell containing metabolically challenged in-the-first-place or we wouldn't BE here bodies are NOT like normal people's ....

It only takes a very small thing to tip the scale back into " regain " mode ... unfortunately ..... and that regain can be slow and insidious at first ... switching our body composition from muscle to fat even while our weight stays apparently the same for a while .... and then the size and the weight balloons and people feel sorry for themselves but the truth is they were cheating all along and kind of thumbing nose at the weight loss gods ....

U are still in the time when U CAN lose weight relatively easily ..and not for long . Are U happy with Ur body in a three - way mirror ? Will U be happy with it if it regains twenty lbs as it MIGHT ten years hence ?

If not then I advise U to concentrate on getting down to where U want to be while U still can and leaving an ample enough window for bounceback so U can be super happy even with the inevitable weight fluctuations life is going to throw at U . ....

Personally , I wouldn't eat ice cream even if it was homemade fat free organic sugar free gelato of my own making .... because even that is FATTENING . My landlord and hubby BOTH floated the idea of respectively buying 300 dollar gelato freezers from Italy because they love that homemade gelato so much and I nixed it forthat very reason .... I dont need to be tempted . I'm fat enough lol ! But if I was an ice cream addict ..thats definitely the way I'd go .... strictly skim milk , a base of sugarfree jello pudding ( the cooked kind is the best ) .....butterbuds ...and natural flavorings ...

 Well the good news is that I treated myself to a spa pedicure today.  (I retired in June and now I tutor 7 clients so I decided I was worth it.)
Last time I went to the spa they gave me an XXL robe (which was tight).  Today they gave me an L and it fit!!!!!!  I think I'll concentrate on writing down all the NSVs instead of eating!
Janet

 go Janet  !  Brava  !  I bet  Ur toes look so pretty too  

I can assure you I am afraid of ice cream.  I know if it was in the house, I would be getting a spoonful more and more frequently. 

Luckily my DH's vices are things I don't care for, sweet rolls, honey buns, etc that I could care if I never ate another one of. 

Good bread is another story.  But on my plan, we can't have bread yet.  So I have only had a taste once when we were out to eat.  I won't bake although I love baking bread so I won't be tempted.

Fatty stuff, sausage, cream sauces, cheese, etc. is my downfall.  As long as I am low carb, it seems to be ok and I still lose. 

I agree, get with the program now and get it off.  Then we will all be dealing with maintainance together.

I was and still am an ice cream addict.  The way I deal with this now, is to make my protein shakes REALLY thick, almost like soft serve ice cream and I eat it with a spoon.  It totally satisfies my ice cream craving and it's within my eating plan.  :0)