How do you deal with attention?

Wow. So, I have been steadily losing weight (obviously), and trying to convince myself that due to my loss being anywhere from1-3 pound/week, it won't be too obvious that I have this amazing tool! At work I often times wear a smock, more as the coverup than to protect my clothing, but have been taking it off more and more as I am realizing that once warmer weather arrives, and lighter clothing get donned I am really going to stand out!

So now, as I greet my "regular" clientele, I am barraged with "oh my God, you have lost a lot of weight!", or "I noticed your face was thin, but didn't see your BODY!!! WOW!" Now, don't get me wrong, I am THRILLED beyond words with my weight loss. I am really liking my image again. But, I get so embarrassed if the attention continues. And I cannot believe the people *****ally ask "how much weight have you lost?" To answer that (anywhere but here) implies just how heavy I was!

Now, I knew eventually I was going to get this, so it's no surprise. And to a certain degree I like that my hard work is being noticed. I just can't bare the speculation. I don't want to share my "secrets to weight loss" and a lot of the people I am encountering, want my mentoring! Uuggghhhh. I am having a hard time keeping my privacy and not feeling vulnerable.

I wish I were confident enough to shout from the rooftops, "I had WLS!!!!". Truth is, Small towns are tough in that people judge, and "talk", and share information that I would not be comfortable with, so here i am. Just wondering how many of you dealt with the invasion of privacy?

I will learn as i go to OWN THIS... just hard right now.... Just my thoughts for the day...

For me, losing weight *this time* the thing that helped me not feel so vulnerable has been lifting weights.  I feel stronger in my body, and I also feel less inclinced to give power to other people's opinions of me, good or bad. 

ITs a weird place to get through and past, but its just another one of those awkward surgical puberty moments :} 

Keep on sharing your thinks!  They always help more folks than you know they do!

I know what you mean. I am learning to say, "Thank you." Some people know about the WLS, but other people, especially patients, I don't say anything more. When I tell people that I have worked hard to lose the weight by weighing and measuring my food, keeping a food journal, and going to the gym 3-5 times/week, most people's eyes just glaze over. This takes alot of work and isn't the easy way, whatsoever. Keep it to yourself, if you are more comfortable with that perspective. Many people do not understand or know anything about WLS, so I don't tell most people.

Sample responses:

"Thank you for noticing."  (period!)

"How much have I lost?? Well, I guess enough to make a difference, right?? hahahaha"

"How?  A lot of it was like they always say, diet and exercise..."

"How?  I actually got a lot of good hints for recipes and stuff at a site my doctor recommended called www.obesityhelp.com, you can check it out yourself."

Good job and it won't be long before they get used to a new thinner you and quit asking questions.  Give them time to process YOUR weight loss.  haha

Love these responses!!

Taking note for (hopefully) future use. ;)

I'm 2 1/2 yrs post op and people Still comment.  I say (now) I'm good and my weight has been steady for almost 2 yrs now.  I keep/kept my answers short. I work with the public (as it sounds you do too), so I would give a short nice answer and then change the subject!  But I'm also one of those that just comes out and says "I had WLS."  I've heard a lot of people say "I'm losing weight so I can be healthier" or "I'm working close with my dr on a weightloss plan that is working for me". 

Good luck! 

I get this alot. My response is, "It feels good to be healthy!" If they question. I respond by saying...I had weightloss surgery...my heart got to where it couldn't take my weight and I had to do something about it. That usually shuts them up they just look at me in AWW....I guess you could say....The proof is in the pudding or lack there of..Ha-ha.
I live in a small town too. It used to bother me that they judged me but now I have decided. "THEY" weren't living in this body I was and I did what I had to do to be the healthiest ME I could be. It is WORTH IT ALL!

I'm with the others, it took a while to learn to just say "thank you" and leave it at that. For some people who I knew had a great sense of humor, I'd cackle and say in a weird voice "I'm melting...just like the Wicked Witch" (I have a reputation of being a hard-ass at work).

I did find a list of weight comparisons (1 pound is a hamster, 4 pounds is a human head, 45 pounds is a ****er spaniel, that sort of thing), and if someone asked me how much I'd lost, I'd give the answer from that list (well, the work rep is also a smart ass).

If anyone, however, came to me and asked how they could do what I did, then I sat down and went through the whole shebang.

The people I work with knew I had the surgery, although I didn't put it out there for most of them until it had been done, but I didn't need to discuss it with parents and outside consultants, so using the humor just kind of deflected it. And then the first time they sat through a meeting with me eating the new way, they assumed that it was the old traditional methods.

It's actually been kind of fun running into people whom I've known for years who don't recognize me and freaking them out!

When someone mentions that it looks like I lost weight I just say "Thank you for noticing. I am working on it." With me it's kind of weird because I am a revision. The first time I told everyone who would listen so when I regained not only did people look at me with sympathy but kind of surprise, too, since they knew I had surgery. In the last 10 years I have been fat, lost weight, gained it, lost it with surgery, gained it again, lost it again, gained it again and now lost it again. So I think most people who know me pretty much don't say a thing because I am just as familar to them fat as I am thin. I think the surprise would be if I weighed the same from one year to the next.

 LOL  !  the ever - changing woman