Update on me and my life changes....

Linda - to be honest, I thrive on being busy - I hate being lax and bored.  Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy days of laziness, but I do like activity, goals and something to look forward to, which this is providing me.

I really don't think I'll be able to take the retirement option if offered... as I have some financial goals to achieve in the next few years, and retirement income just doesn't cut it - lol.  But that's ok.  If I do happen to retire, I'd probably find somewhere else to work since Tom's not eligible for anothr 5 years.

I know what you mean about retirement, I have a couple of financial goals I want to accomplish before I retired in 3 1/2 years.  I think I would like to just have the option to do it if I decided I wanted to.  DH is retired and just hangs out at home(he does almost everything at home now).  I would never have thought he could do this and not be totally bored, but he loves it.  I think I need more structure and will need to make myself do something to be around people part of the week. 

Jody,

Wishing you the best of things with all your new changes. Wow!! At least you won't be bored. LOL. Major life changes are happening. Be sure to take care of yourself.

Thanks!  It will all work out in the end. 

 How old is your son?

That can make a huge difference. Not being a parent, I should probably not say anything, but among my friends, the happiest and most accomplished kids seem to be the ones who go off on their own. Part of parenting seems to be letting go. They stumble some, but learning to pay your bills and work are values for a lifetime.

Everything else sounds right on track. You'll heal again. You already set up the kitchen. The pictures of you are Tom say a thousand words of happiness together.

Enjoy another phase of the roller coaster.

He's 21, but still in school full time. He told me today that the hired 2 new part time people and cut his hours 10 hours a week (he works at Subway).  He also is paying for most of his college expenses. 

I talked to him today and he has several leads on places.  He's a little stressed but doing pretty good with it.

 Jody, I can bet you are a great mom. He sounds like a good kid. You have so many things to juggle now, but he knows the condo deal did not fall through because of anything you did. You have given him options. Glad to learn he has his own leads and is adjusting. 

Wow Jody!!  You've got that proverbial "full plate".  I've been watching you for the last year and you've had lots of events, each of which you handled beautifully.  I know that this won't be any different.  You're going to figure out the exact right things, then take them 1 step at a time.  I'm so happy that Tom is in your life and that he treats you with so much love and respect. 

I really get it about your son because you know how close I am to Zach.  Your son will figure it out.  You've given him 21 good years and he can still come live with you if he chooses to.  Being a good parent means giving our kids the skills to go out in the world and take care of themselves.  You've done that so no need for guilt unless it makes you feel better.

Why are so many of you talking about retiring?  I'm staring down another 6 years or more.  What the heck is up with that?  :)

I guess I'm a little overprotective with him, since he and his dad have such a volatile relationship - and that's the reason we are as close as we are.  He is a great kid and has really turned out very well, even with the adversities he faced growing up.  And yes, Tom is a true gem. 

Tom and I had a little talk yesterday about money.  He's never been in a relationship with someone who worked and actually made money.  This is a big adjustment for him.  We were talking about a new washer and dryer (his dryer is dying) and I told him that's going to be the next purchase.  He said "I really need you to talk to me before spending money".  I'm like "huh - you kidding me?"  LOL.  I said "hun- that's not me, that's NOT going to happen and you just have to get used to the fact that I work and have discretionary income"... and can spend it as I please.  He agreed.  Smart man - LOL. 

Retiring you ask?  Well.. because I'm tired of working?  LOL... I'd just like to do something else.  What I don't know right now, but just would like the option if I choose.  It will happen in time.  I just think with the workplace being unstable, not knowing from day to day whats going to happen, more responsibility given all the time without the addition of time or resources, I think people are just stressing out earlier and this is their option, if they can do it. 

Jody,

You hae the best attitude about all the changes and that will keep you going as you make all of these unexpected changes.  One of the books I read during therapy says that whereever we are is exactly where we are supposed to be. I remind myself of  that often whenever it seems that things are out of control!

Have fun with all the changes.
Janet