Telling friends and family

I know most have given there opinions already.  But I'm going to give mine!  I didn't tell anyone except family and a couple of co workers during my "research" phase.  I only told my co workers because I was going to be taking time off to go to the Dr and stuff.  I told friends and customers the week leading up to my surgery.  The only reason I didn't say anything before hand.....I didn't want to jinx my surgery!!!  I'm silly that way.  Figured if I told everyone when I was having it down, then something happened and the ins pushed me off...then I had to tell everyone different!!  Made this mistake when I got pregnant, told everyone...only to have a miscarriage weeks later!  So when exciting stuff is coming, I tend to wait until the last minute to share! 

Other than that, I tell pretty much anyone!  My customers would ask me (as I was losing weight) if I was feeling alright.  I'd say yes, I had WLS.  Obviously not too many people ask me or mention anything anymore, but I've never been ashamed to say I had WLS!  I am very proud for the decision I made!!

April,
sounds like you know what you'll get if you tell. 
So the ball's in your court... what attitudes are you willing to handle?

I have told only those people who are supportive, positive, and affirming. .... I haven't told my closest friend, who will obsess about all the potential complications, and I only want positive energy for my pre-op days and the surgery.   I will tell her a few days before, when I borrow her zero gravity chair for my recovery period.    After the surgery, I know I can count on her to be supportive, but I'm saving her worry for now.

I also asked 15 other people about their WLS experience, and most of them are within my circle of friends. They probably know I'm considering WLS.... lol... but not that the decision's made.

I'm not telling my parents. My mother, who is a retired surg nurse, will start with the horror stories..  My father and I don't speak, so that saves me a decision. My brothers I might tell in the days after surgery, in a weak ploy to get a bouquet of fresh flowers.  They live far enough away that their opinions won't impact me.

Hope this helps.

I've told pretty much everyone...so has my husband, his surgery was on the 16th of Dec. His mom wasn't really on board until another member of his family had hers about 2 months ago. Then all of a sudden it was okay for him to have it. :)

But yeah, we tell everyone if it happens to come up. It's no secret.

But that's just us...nothing wrong with keeping it private.

I think it's a very personal decision. I'm not a big fan of trying to "pass off the surgery as a exercise thing" - I guess I'm not a big fan of lying to people. That said, you really have to decide on your own who you tell.

I've handled it my way - which is telling most folks, but I always preface the conversation with my concerns over pre-diabetic conditions and my high blood pressure. I don't focus on the weight loss itself, but on the health benefits. I have told most folks who have made comments about my weight drop - and my family all knows, but they are supportive.

I haven't regretted telling anyone, but I'm pretty much an open book and it would be extremely hard for me to hide something like this - and I really HATE lying to people. I figure you're going to have to tell your family at some point, but maybe you want to wait until after the surgery - that's fine. You need to do what is right for you.

I'm not a fan of lying to people. But if they come out and ask me. I would be honest with them. In the long run. I know after I have this done and my siblings found out or my in law's...It once again gives them room to put me down and/or to make fun of me. Sorry that is something no one should have to go through!! Small or large!

I'm an open book also but I think with this its very personal! If someone(like me) has issues with self confidence you really think opening myself up to be made fun of is the answer I would have to disagree!!

Thanks for your advise!

I have chosen to tell my DH and children.  My parents and sibling do not know and I am almost a year and a half out.  I don't regret it for a second as they would have been all over me judging, being the food police and generally not a good source of support.  No one at work, except the company nurse knows.  If I were to do it again, I would do it the same way.