My life is changing.......

AshleyInTexas
on 12/9/10 1:14 am - TX

Well......I'm going to be a grandma at 27 years old. My 17 year old step-daughter is PREGNANT!

I'm not even sure where to start? I'm kind of in a daze like maybe this is just a dream and I will wake up in a few minutes?!?!? This is all so much to take in.

She's made it clear she is keeping the baby. Since she just took a test and found out, we are calculating that this baby is due in August right before Kalei starts her senior year in high school. Her boyfriend Zach is a senior now and leaves for the ARMY in June. Talk about bad timing. LOL.....I know it's not funny but if I dont find a way to laugh or smile during this I think I'm going to explode. This is just so life changing for EVERYONE involved.

Thoughts, prayers, swing lizards please!!!!

Anyone had to deal with a teen pregnancy? Any advice would be great.

Ash

RNY 8-6-2007 stats 5'3" HW-240 SW-232 LW-127 GW-120 CW-135
Plastics round #1 on 3-23-2011 BL/BA 575cc & 550cc Silicone under the muscle
Married 9 yrs with 3 kids- Savannah 8, Skyler 2 & Bryder 1

MajorMom
on 12/9/10 1:18 am - VA

DS on 08/09/07

I haven't had to deal with teen pregnancy but I do so enjoy being a grandma. Swinging lizards for you all and sending cyber hugs your way too.

--gina

5'1" -- HW 195/SW 187/GW 115 July 08/CW 121 Dec 2012
******GOAL*******
Starting BMI between 35 and 40ish?
Join us on the Lightweights Board!
DS on Aug 9, 2007 with Dr. Hazem Elariny

AshleyInTexas
on 12/9/10 1:33 am - TX

RNY on 08/06/07

Thank you Gina!

I'm looking for a support board on the web. I don't have any teen pregnancy in my family so I can't really ask anyone how to cope or help Kalei. We will just take it one day at a time.

RNY 8-6-2007 stats 5'3" HW-240 SW-232 LW-127 GW-120 CW-135
Plastics round #1 on 3-23-2011 BL/BA 575cc & 550cc Silicone under the muscle
Married 9 yrs with 3 kids- Savannah 8, Skyler 2 & Bryder 1

IRAYD8U
on 12/9/10 1:35 am - MONTICELLO, MN

RNY on 07/21/09

Ash I'd love to say congrats.....but I'm not sure that is what you're wanting to hear. I have the tendancy to find the up side in bad situations......you say the boyfriend is going into the Army....well if he does that they won't let him shirk his responsibilities as a father! You will also be a cool grandma....!! Not many kids can say thier grandma is young and hip......usually it's grandma BROKE a hip.......LOL You guys will get through this......just be supportive of her and her decisions even if they don't make sense!

HEATHER
Join us on the Lightweights Board
Ask me about our Facebook Chat Group: OH WLS-Lightweights
36 years old 5'7" HW 256 / SW 240 / CW 145 / GW 140

AshleyInTexas
on 12/9/10 4:04 am - TX

RNY on 08/06/07

Thanks for making me laught.....I really needed that. LOL....no broken hips here.....yet anyway! I too, try to find the positive in things. I know this baby is going to be blessed because we have a strong supportive family for he/she to be born into. We will leave the congrats to the day the baby is born. I will def. be a young grandma thats for sure!

We will get through it......we have too

RNY 8-6-2007 stats 5'3" HW-240 SW-232 LW-127 GW-120 CW-135
Plastics round #1 on 3-23-2011 BL/BA 575cc & 550cc Silicone under the muscle
Married 9 yrs with 3 kids- Savannah 8, Skyler 2 & Bryder 1

Shannon D.
on 12/9/10 1:37 am

VSG on 03/23/10

My 17 year old step-sister just had a baby 2 months ago. She never showed and no one knew until about 2 weeks before she delivered. We all kind of pulled together and got her everything she needed. My step-mom stays at home, so she is watching the baby while sis is in school, and is trying really hard not to take over. I think that's the biggest issue with teen pregnancy, someone else takes all of the responsibility and the mom thinks it is so easy to raise the child because they aren't doing it. She went back to school a week after delivery, and had a tutor and kept up with homework while she was out. She has changed her college plans from moving away to starting at a junior college.

5'0" HW-214   SW-186 GW-115 CW-96-99

AshleyInTexas
on 12/9/10 4:12 am - TX

RNY on 08/06/07

The positive thing about Kalei is that she knows first hand how hard it is with a baby. She's seen us have Skyler and Bryder now 1 and 2 yrs old. She really does have a "mother hen" type nature and I'm positive she will be a very good mother.

My other concern is myself.......being Bryder just turned 1 yr old last week I'm feeling that "baby fever" and DH is fixed. So this grandbaby is going to be spoiled and since I stay home more than likely I will be watching he/she while Kalei is in school. I'm okay with that.

I hope like you said, it takes the responsability away from Kalei making her think it's easy to raise a baby. I don't think it would but you never know.

Now lets hope its a boy cuz then we wouldn't have to buy very much stuff being that I just have a baby a year ago myself!

RNY 8-6-2007 stats 5'3" HW-240 SW-232 LW-127 GW-120 CW-135
Plastics round #1 on 3-23-2011 BL/BA 575cc & 550cc Silicone under the muscle
Married 9 yrs with 3 kids- Savannah 8, Skyler 2 & Bryder 1

G.I.Jane
on 12/9/10 1:40 am

RNY on 11/19/10

No experience with this, but I'd seriously work with her on the possibility of adoption. If she can't "do it on her own" then maybe she should think about what's best for the baby. Her life is definitely over from now on if she keeps the baby. Fun and games are over, she's catapulted into an adult lifestyle. How good of a mom will she be? While she's going to high school? Does that mean that you are mommy or her other mom is mommy to the baby? What involvement does the father plan to have? Sounds like it's time to have these discussions with her. How is she going to support herself and the baby? How about college, is that gone now? Daycare expenses? Raising a baby without a dad and a mom - I know folks can do it, but it sure isn't what's best for the baby.

Wow, I really feel for you. It's a tough position to be in. Worse yet for the baby to have a 17 year old mom. That is really going to be rough on the kid as well as the mother. And there are so many good couples out there that can't conceive - how great it would be to know the baby was going to a great home with two adult parents.

Wishing you all the good luck in the world!

You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there. Unknown.

AshleyInTexas
on 12/9/10 4:22 am - TX

RNY on 08/06/07

DH and I have tried to talk to her about adoption. Before we could even get it out she made it clear she and Zach don't want to consider adpotion or abortion.

Zach is a senior. Graduating in May and leaving for the ARMY in June. He is a good kid. He wants to be a part of this baby's life and I wouldn't be to shocked if he asked Kalei to marry him.

Kalei has made it clear she is going to finish and graduate high school. Either the program for pregnant teens at her highschool or doing a homeschool program. She knows how important her education is and knows we arent going to let her off the hook when it comes to graduating.

Zach, myself, DH and Kalei's mom will have to be her support system. She's going to need us.

I know plenty of couples that are trying to conceive or are infertile. Some are in our family. I feel for them. I also so know that Kalei will only push us away if we pressure her into something she doesnt want to do.

Thanks for wishing us luck.....we are going to need it I'm sure

Ash ;o)

RNY 8-6-2007 stats 5'3" HW-240 SW-232 LW-127 GW-120 CW-135
Plastics round #1 on 3-23-2011 BL/BA 575cc & 550cc Silicone under the muscle
Married 9 yrs with 3 kids- Savannah 8, Skyler 2 & Bryder 1

G.I.Jane
on 12/9/10 6:47 am

RNY on 11/19/10

Ash,

I hope he does marry her and they can be a stable influence on this baby's life. If she's going to do this, she needs to do A LOT of it on her own. You guys take over the baby care and it will end up that she can't do it herself when the time comes.

I hope it all works out for the best.

You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there. Unknown.

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