grateful post
(deactivated member)
on 9/14/10 1:00 pm, edited 9/14/10 1:13 pm
on 9/14/10 1:00 pm, edited 9/14/10 1:13 pm
Once in a while U have an inadvertent wow moment if U will.....I havent put on jeans all summer . Its been hot .... and frankly , I felt FAT . I was AFRAID to try on my skinny jeans !
The other day I wore some size three ones without issues ( actually they were quite LARGE ) but i told myself they were stretchy . Then today , i had an emergency down in Asbury Park and i grabbed the first pair of jeans i saw- which were zeros - and they fit fine . NO having to undo the waistband , nothing . NOt even during the hour and a half long drive down and back each way .
My size two Brooks Brothers jacket buttoned up without issue too . Not that I don't have a muffin top between the two .. but honestly , when have i NOT had that ? Maybe for three minutes somewhere in March ?
So I just want to say Im grateful . Despite myself ,I have maintained my loss . I may not be where I WANT to be ..but Im not spiraling out of control either though a week ago I could have SWORN i was .....
It feels GOOD not to be TERRIFIED of instant and irrrevokable weight gain all the time . Im just beginning to get used to it actually - to believe, finally , that this tool MIGHT just work and keep working . Now tomorrow .. I may be singing another tune when my body retains ten lbs lol or wont zip up a junior 4 dress .....but just for today , Im OK , Im content .
On the ongoing changing food habits battle front : my OA sponsor took me back ! Yay ! so we're working on journaling food and planning a program of abstinence . She has me drinking eight eight ounce glasses of water a day - so far ive managed five ...and growing...
Its a funny thing about OA meetings - just when U give up on the m EVER working ....something magical happens where a lot of the compulsive overeating just drops off . Its not something U consciously do , either ....but it works if U persist . Kind of like AA ..you attend enough meetings, you'll get sober .... in OA , you keep going U WILL get the strength , desire and willingness to become abstinent .
Right now , it feels as if food isnt all that important anymore .. that I wont STARVE or feel desperately deprived if I dont eat whatever comes into my head .
I have a little bit of time and space for mature reflection before I reflexively stuff my face , in other words .. and often , I just choose to do something else .
Just because it occurs to me to eat doesnt mean I MUST or that i WANT To ..its probably NOT The best thing for me ... and the fact that I can actually make a decision along those lines ...
is a minor miracle lol !! Today I feel very grateful.... and once again , thank U all for being such wonderful , supportive , caring true friends ! much love and hugs
Ava
The other day I wore some size three ones without issues ( actually they were quite LARGE ) but i told myself they were stretchy . Then today , i had an emergency down in Asbury Park and i grabbed the first pair of jeans i saw- which were zeros - and they fit fine . NO having to undo the waistband , nothing . NOt even during the hour and a half long drive down and back each way .
My size two Brooks Brothers jacket buttoned up without issue too . Not that I don't have a muffin top between the two .. but honestly , when have i NOT had that ? Maybe for three minutes somewhere in March ?
So I just want to say Im grateful . Despite myself ,I have maintained my loss . I may not be where I WANT to be ..but Im not spiraling out of control either though a week ago I could have SWORN i was .....
It feels GOOD not to be TERRIFIED of instant and irrrevokable weight gain all the time . Im just beginning to get used to it actually - to believe, finally , that this tool MIGHT just work and keep working . Now tomorrow .. I may be singing another tune when my body retains ten lbs lol or wont zip up a junior 4 dress .....but just for today , Im OK , Im content .
On the ongoing changing food habits battle front : my OA sponsor took me back ! Yay ! so we're working on journaling food and planning a program of abstinence . She has me drinking eight eight ounce glasses of water a day - so far ive managed five ...and growing...
Its a funny thing about OA meetings - just when U give up on the m EVER working ....something magical happens where a lot of the compulsive overeating just drops off . Its not something U consciously do , either ....but it works if U persist . Kind of like AA ..you attend enough meetings, you'll get sober .... in OA , you keep going U WILL get the strength , desire and willingness to become abstinent .
Right now , it feels as if food isnt all that important anymore .. that I wont STARVE or feel desperately deprived if I dont eat whatever comes into my head .
I have a little bit of time and space for mature reflection before I reflexively stuff my face , in other words .. and often , I just choose to do something else .
Just because it occurs to me to eat doesnt mean I MUST or that i WANT To ..its probably NOT The best thing for me ... and the fact that I can actually make a decision along those lines ...
is a minor miracle lol !! Today I feel very grateful.... and once again , thank U all for being such wonderful , supportive , caring true friends ! much love and hugs
Ava
HUGS right back at ya AVA 
I am so jealous of your size 2's and 0's...!! I almost fainted when I slipped into a size 6 with room to move. LOL
Great job and I am so happy you have such great support. Rock it sunshine!!!
I am so jealous of your size 2's and 0's...!! I almost fainted when I slipped into a size 6 with room to move. LOL Great job and I am so happy you have such great support. Rock it sunshine!!!
HW / SW / CW / GW (1st goal met!! ) New Goal Weight height 5'3"
230 / 196 / 132 / 135 125
I'm doing great. I go back to work next Tues. I have a ritual of snuggling up with the heating pad nightly. Hot baths are every other day or so...tomorrow I'm going to stay in my room and give myself a hair/face cleansing.
I am out walking every morning so mobility is great! I can sit without much discomfort which is AWESOME!!!
I am enjoying the benefits of the surgery already not peeing when I sneeze, cough, or even just walk/bend over. I am NOT liking this SLOW healing crap. Once I get over it in my mind (which is even slower than my body physically) then I'll be a force to reckon with...LOL
Thank you so much for asking...
I meant to ask on the prior post...hope everything was ok with the "emergency" you had to go to...was it work related?
I am out walking every morning so mobility is great! I can sit without much discomfort which is AWESOME!!!
I am enjoying the benefits of the surgery already not peeing when I sneeze, cough, or even just walk/bend over. I am NOT liking this SLOW healing crap. Once I get over it in my mind (which is even slower than my body physically) then I'll be a force to reckon with...LOL
Thank you so much for asking...
I meant to ask on the prior post...hope everything was ok with the "emergency" you had to go to...was it work related?
HW / SW / CW / GW (1st goal met!! ) New Goal Weight height 5'3"
230 / 196 / 132 / 135 125
(deactivated member)
on 9/15/10 5:16 am
on 9/15/10 5:16 am
my rental house got broken into . Had to board up five windows .... yes it makes more work ( they cut the heating units out in preparation for taking them to the dump n selling em for copper n aluminum ) but thank God they didnt actually remove anything . So a buncha extra welds should take care of it ..... grrrrr though . Like i NEEDED more work down there lol .
Ava - I was just thinking this morning "Where has Ava been?"
Glad you have realized your tool is still working! size 0 is awesome - the only thing I bought in a 0 was a skirt - and I think they mis-marked it. I even tried it on today and it was too big and I'm in a solid 4 in misses - and I don't even like to try on Junior sizes!
Keep up the positive thinking and affirmation - it makes all the difference in the world!
Glad you have realized your tool is still working! size 0 is awesome - the only thing I bought in a 0 was a skirt - and I think they mis-marked it. I even tried it on today and it was too big and I'm in a solid 4 in misses - and I don't even like to try on Junior sizes!
Keep up the positive thinking and affirmation - it makes all the difference in the world!
HW-218/SW-208/CW-126/ Lowest Weight-121/Goal-125 - hit 8/23/09/Height-5'3"
Regain 30 lbs from 2012 to 2016 - got back on track and lost it. Took 8 months.
90+/- pounds lost BMI - 24 or so
Starting BMI between 35 and 40ish?
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