X-Post from RNY board.. with permission
The name of this post is "Forgive me first love, the break up"... I thought it was very well put and had insights perhaps many of us haven't quite put into perspective or realized yet. Xenobia is the author:
I learned that there is a constant battle between the person I am evolving into and the person that I am shedding each day.Despite my intentions to move on, The fat girl has no intention of going away peacefully. She feels entitled! After all she has been a welcomed host in my body, mind and spirit for 35 years. And until now I have allowed her to run amuck! I've asked her to go on many occasions and each time she would disappear temporarily and then the allure of her would always reunite us.
Now that I am at another turning point the fat girl is having tantrums! "Don't work out today I am tired" "That's too hard" "Lets just stay in bed we hard a hard day we can do it tomorrow"! I had to shut her up. I used to do it with Hag-gen Daz and Krispy Kreme but now I ignore her and feed my emotional and emptiness with positive thoughts.Now that its time to move on. I am under no illusions, I know she will show up again every now and then. I will remember to thank her for all being there when I didn't know or wasn't willing to live another way. I thank her for doing what she thought was protecting me and comforting me. But know that I know better I need to do better. I am worthy of the new life and loves ahead me. In order to claim them I need to let you go. So forgive me first love.
Today the difference between impossible and possible is WILL.
I learned that there is a constant battle between the person I am evolving into and the person that I am shedding each day.Despite my intentions to move on, The fat girl has no intention of going away peacefully. She feels entitled! After all she has been a welcomed host in my body, mind and spirit for 35 years. And until now I have allowed her to run amuck! I've asked her to go on many occasions and each time she would disappear temporarily and then the allure of her would always reunite us.
Now that I am at another turning point the fat girl is having tantrums! "Don't work out today I am tired" "That's too hard" "Lets just stay in bed we hard a hard day we can do it tomorrow"! I had to shut her up. I used to do it with Hag-gen Daz and Krispy Kreme but now I ignore her and feed my emotional and emptiness with positive thoughts.Now that its time to move on. I am under no illusions, I know she will show up again every now and then. I will remember to thank her for all being there when I didn't know or wasn't willing to live another way. I thank her for doing what she thought was protecting me and comforting me. But know that I know better I need to do better. I am worthy of the new life and loves ahead me. In order to claim them I need to let you go. So forgive me first love.
Today the difference between impossible and possible is WILL.
HW-218/SW-208/CW-126/ Lowest Weight-121/Goal-125 - hit 8/23/09/Height-5'3"
Regain 30 lbs from 2012 to 2016 - got back on track and lost it. Took 8 months.
90+/- pounds lost BMI - 24 or so
Starting BMI between 35 and 40ish?
Join us on the Lightweights Board!
Jody, thanks so much for sharing this. I really needed it this morning. I've had two bad days with my old love and have lost the battle both days. Today is a new day and a better day.
Of course a bad day now is nothing like a bad day used to be!!
I'm going to check out those sneakers you mentioned you got from Walmart. I hope they have them for that price at our Walmart.
Linda
Of course a bad day now is nothing like a bad day used to be!!
I'm going to check out those sneakers you mentioned you got from Walmart. I hope they have them for that price at our Walmart.
Linda
14.5 lost pre-surgery 5'1 1/2" 
Linda - one thing I noticed with each pair I checked out in the store, was that the cushion inside the shoe - up by the toes were folded under. I'm wondering if there was some kind of "processing defect". I just unfolded it and haven't had a problem with them.
Man - I could feel it in my hips today, and I could feel it in my legs as I was walking yesterday too. I'm hoping that's a good thing!
Today is a new day - goopd attitude and I hope the old love gets defeated!!
Man - I could feel it in my hips today, and I could feel it in my legs as I was walking yesterday too. I'm hoping that's a good thing!
Today is a new day - goopd attitude and I hope the old love gets defeated!!
HW-218/SW-208/CW-126/ Lowest Weight-121/Goal-125 - hit 8/23/09/Height-5'3"
Regain 30 lbs from 2012 to 2016 - got back on track and lost it. Took 8 months.
90+/- pounds lost BMI - 24 or so
Starting BMI between 35 and 40ish?
Join us on the Lightweights Board!
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