What's wrong with people!

P.S.  Not sure how to link to a message but Mimi In NY's post is on the VSG forum under a thread called "How do I explain I'm not done loosing (sic)" from 8/10/10.   I have copied her quotes to keep for myself.

Kat70  

hey Maria, do you remember her name?  I will be there in a few weeks, and I can kick her *ss for you!!  I have already gotten those comments and I have not even had surgery yet!  Cant wait to see what happens after.  I am doing this surgery to AVOID having any co-morbidities.  And I am over 100 lbs overweight.  Just how FAT do they want you to be anyway???  I just remember something my mom told me once....  I may be fat now but I can lose weight, they will always be idiots..... dont let them get to you, you did the right thing for you and thats all that matters.    Joan

 I can relate!!!  When I had my 1st visit with the surgeon, the coordinator weighed me, and I was about 197, and 5 feet tall... she told me that I really didn't need the surgery, and that if I could lose about 25-30 lbs, she'd BET I would be pleased.... uhhhhh, I have tried to do that for YEARS and all is documented!!!!!!  I can lose weight, but I cant keep it off... She then went as far to say, if I lost 75 lbs, I would be tooo small, and would look like a teenager, and she was sure I didn't want to do that... and I WAS like... WHY NOT???  She is the person that schedules the surgery dates for the doctor, and I was kind of pissed, to say the least.  I did EVERYTHING I was told to do, had EVERYTHING documented that I was told to have documented, and she told me it was just no use, as the co-morbids that I did have (Gerd, lower back pain, knee pains, and high cholesterol), just didn't cut it, and was not a TRUE CO-MORBID... and she was not going to submit it to their insurance lady, because she was sure i would not be approved, well the INSURANCE lady scheduled me for a sleep study, and come to find out I do have MODERATE SLEEP APNEA, and they will be submitting my packet in for approval.  So, I know exactly the feeling... I even put on a few pounds which took me to a 40 BMI, (vacation week is all it took)   I am still waiting on approval or denial... but if denied, I will NOT STOP THERE!!  Congrats on stepping in, and wanting to get healthy before it's too late, or get too far out of hand, which is what I am doing!   YOU'RE MY IDOL!!!   

I can relate! I finally learned to just smile and say that 3 nonsurgical doctors told me this was the best choice for my health, and leave it at that.

When pressed (very few people press: I can look at a person with that fascinated/disgusted look you give a large dead bug with a very straight face for over a minute), I tell them I had metabolic issues and that the weight loss is a beneficial side effect of the surgery to resolve those issues. All true, just not particularly forthcoming.

And for idiots who have no real need to know, I see no need to be forthcoming.

Don'tcha just want to say, "If I didn't qualify for the surgery, do you really think the surgeon would be wasting his and my time???" DUMASS!!!! 

I agree, I think this is EXACTLY why there is a lightweights board!  I can't even tell you how many times I heard the same thing that nurse said to you, we've all heard it....multiple times I am sure!

I think that the misconception of this surgery is that you have to be SMO and then some before they'll do something so drastic as gastric bypass.... at least that's what it seems like people think to me! 

Remember, you took this step for YOU, and no one else.  We all understand.

I very much understand where you are coming from, I am 5'2" (on a good day) and was 208lbs.  I had less than 100lbs to lose.  I was told almost daily I wasn't fat enough, that I wasn't even fat.  Yeah I was and I had all those things wrong with me and I was tired of dying slowly from the inside out. 

So, you stand up for yourself.

i tell people- when i want their opinion;  i'll give it to them

I am 4'11" and when I weighed in at my PCP in April, I weighed 210. HE recommended WLS for me. It wasn't even on my radar. That is how my journey started. With the pre-op diet, I have lost 27 lbs and weighed 183.5 lbs yesterday at my pre-op appointment. The surgeon didn't say that I weighed too little for surgery and working for a large HMO, he wasn't getting paid individually for the surgery, so obviously I fit the criteria. I do have severe sleep apnea, prediabetes, and HTN. With the weight loss so far, my back pain has lessened and I am able to walk more.

So far, my hairdresser was the most shocked reaction that I have had, and she has watched me yo-yo for years. Some of the co-workers have been very supportive; others skeptical.

Yep - mee too.  Except mine was in the Dr's office by another patient.  I was in for my 2nd week follow up visit and has lost 15 lbs already and she said "you JUST had surgery - why???"

Luckily for me the nurse called me back right then so I didn't have to answer her.  Since then I haven't had any remarks saying i wasn't big enough.  Funny how when you lose weight people keep telling you how great you look.  Didn't get THAT before....

"Do people really believe that you have to wait until your are so sick that you are almost not a surgical candidate?"

Yes. Basically, they do.

It's dumb, but what are you going to do?

Though I'd report that nurse. To say that to you POST-OP was completely uncalled for and not part of her job description.