About as supportive as a blade of grass...

My support person has essentially backtracked on her promise and bailed on me. She had promised she'd stay at my house with my dogs Monday night and didn't but I let that fly because although a promise is a promise I probably would not want to stay in someone else's empty house overnight.

Yesterday my support person and her daughter-in-law came to get me from being discharged and she had planned to go cook for her grandkids and come back but instead stayed with me... and bailed at 8pm because she said her granddaughter would not sleep if she wasn't home. Long story short her DIL is a real class act when it comes to parenting and really does nothing with her own 3 kids. Anyways, I was tired and just wanted to catch some zzz's so I let THAT fly since the baby isn't here.

Today comes... she came this morning to take the dogs out before SHE had a Dr.'s appt., she had known about my surgery since the get go and found out the date the same day I did and gave her word she'd be around so I didn't have to buy a plane ticket for my "adopted mom" who is a close friend that took me in when I left a violently abusive 1st marriage. Well, she came back to take me to my appt. at 1:30 and afterwards had carried some stuff in for me and said she'd be back later. Then she sent me the infamous text... "if you need anything let me know"

Are you friggin' kidding me?!?! Make a promise to help for 2 weeks and obviously bail. She knows I have trust issues and rarely let myself depend on anyone at all... and she's screwed me over! So my 10 month old will be home tomorrow, my husband is in Afghanistan battling delirious radicals, and my support person bailed on me less than 48 hours post RNY. Hi, my name is Cort and I am royally friggin' screwed! Can't tell the surgeon or nurse because I will be the one that gets chewed out or accused of deceit.

i know it sucks but you'll get through it.  i had help just the day after surgery then i was on my own.  **** and moan all you want-we'll listen.  you'll manage-you will.

buck up-

hang tough

Holy crap! Are there any other spouses close by that can help you? Or, can you get your adopted mom to come ASAP? Keep us posted.

--gina

I might be able to muster a little help here and there from some wives. My adopted mom is having $$$ issues so can't buy her own ticket and on military pay it isn't just something I can pull out of the woodwork without budgeting.

I'll make it but my 90lb male dog may wish I hadn't if he keeps his stunts up. I am doing my very damn best to make sure I do everything I can on this end to prevent issues like pneumonia since then I'd really be in a tight spot.

I am tough enough to do this, if I wasn't I certainly would not stick around for the military wife role. I just have to get these vents out because my BP and pulse was already high at my visit today and they suspect it might be the narcotics therefore I am trying to work my way through the stiffness so the pain meds won't be needed as much.

But you gotta give yourself time to heal. We were told not to lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk for a month nor take stairs for 2 weeks. Just worried about you.

--g

I'm allowed stairs and can lift up to 10lbs but the Dr. said after a few days as long as I put her in the stroller to move her room to room I can lift her small amounts. Right now the male dog is the biggest issue and I am so close to telling my husband that I'm selling him to the breeder whenever I talk to him. I love the dog dearly but he just can be too much with my husband deployed.

Sorry your helper bailed on you.  I sure wish some of us were closer so we could help you out!!

Can you get someone to take your dog to be boarded for a week or two.  Not something I like to do with mine unless I have to, but it may be necessary so you can take care of yourself.  You really don't need to be lifting very much, you sure don't want to pull anything loose.

Hang in there.

Linda

Most places won't board pit bulls because of the stigma. I mean overall he is a great dog but he just does not realize his size and I think the female is going into heat(never fails, she is supposed to have an appointment next month) so his hormones are ridiculous and the breeder wants us to let them stud him.

I am just battling the emotions of the surgery and such and I know it will ease up. Just need to not make any rash decisions.

Cort - I'm so sorry this happened to you.  I know its crucial to have help to be able to heal properly. I often wonder about people who promise things then don't materialize...  she probably saw you and thought you were doing fine by yourself....  where does your adoptive mom live?

If I were closer I'd be there in a heartbeat to help you out. 

She's in TX and I live on a military base in KY. She'd do great for the emotional aspect but physically she'd have me in the same boat with the dog probably. If I see my neighbor I'm going to see if I can pay them to come deal with him but no guarantee there. I've just got to relax and clear my head so I don't get frenzied and let myself feel so overwhelmed this early into the game.