I thought I was healthy.....

(hi jenncarson- since you asked for a post- any post, here's mine for today )


I always knew I was overweight, at 245lbs I would have to be delusional to think I was not fat...BUT

I did not think of myself as truly unhealthy. I had a little bit of asthma but not severe at all. I wanted to have surgery to be thinner, fit clothes smaller than a 2 man tent and to be able to walk up more than 10 stairs without taking a break.

So I got a referal to a lap-band surgeon and began my quest. So much for my imaginary healthy self.

I have high blood pressure
high cholesterol
insulin resistance (going on Metformin for this)
Ashtma (knew that one)
And a shoulder problem that started a few weeks ago (prob due to the weight on my upper torso ie: my boobs)

The good news is that with my bmi of 41 and the string of co-morbidities I did not really know about I got insurance approval in 2 days and now I'm waiting for them to mail it to the surgeon.

Just thought I'd share my delusional health with all of you!

It amuses me the games we play with ourselves to pretend we're fine when we're not.

Sheli

I know I'm fat, I've been fat for a long time.  I've had high bp for about 10-11 yrs (can't remember the exact date).  I always said "if I tried, I could lose the weight".  WRONG!!!!!!  I've tried in the past, but nothing happened.  I joined a gym, but never really went down in weight.  Now I am diabetic, my cholesteral (sp) is up, I have sleep apnea.  I'm in the process of getting approval.  I have to do 12 months of dr documented weight program.  I keep yo yoing!!!  One month I've lost 7 or 8 lbs, the next month I'm up 4 lbs!  I don't get it!  So I'm hoping to get quick approval!  Or even just APPROVAL! My BMI is just above 40 (depending on the month), but I'm hoping I'm sick enough for the ins co! I too want to be thinner & healthier.  I am embarassed for my family and myself when we go in public.  Especially my son!  I want to have fun when we go places.  I hate telling my son (5) no we can't go to the playground or the pool, just because I'm embarassed!  Its not fair to him!!  Plus I remember being ashamed of my mom a little bit, because she was very overweight when I was growing up.  I always said I would never be like her.  WRONG yet again!!!! That is some of my story Jenn, it nice to see support like yours!  To push some of us Lurkers out in the open!!!!

Lurkers Power!! I really relate to your experience. I felt like the decision process was wrenching and the insurance process took forever. I'm so glad we have this board because it makes me feel like we are all in this boat together.  I really relate to the embarrassment. I'm three and a half months post-op and my BMI is down from 47 to 40. So, it is worth the wait... and the hoops you have to jump through. Keep truckin' You'll be headed for this life changing surgery before you know it. -Jenn C in AZ

Hi Sheli - I can relate to you as well from the simple standpoint that I look around  when I am out and about and although I don't judge others, I sure do judge myself and I try to make my head feel better by saying "well, you're not the biggest one out there" but then I look at my picture and reality hits home. I used to get really depressed and down on myself about the weight and took it out on my DH which totally wasn't fair. I feel like I've got my head in the game now and am so much aware of how the weight affects my attitude and actions that I really try to do my best each day. I say I am healthy for the most part, but carrying all this extra weight isn't healthy. I pretty much have diabetes though the doctor still wants to call it "borderline" and I have a BMI over 40. I risk heart disease and cancer because they run very strongly in my family, but I'd like for my weight not to be part of that equation, so I decided to take action by moving forward with WLS. I have insurance that won't cover it right now so am changing plans in January and hoping the ball will be back in the court then. Godspeed!