scared!!

Well guys... I finally have a date November 9th. I am so excited.... I have not posted in months as I was for sure I would never get approved after waiting almost a year and being denied once. Anyway, its insane how fast things are moving now. I have been spending most of my time on these boards reading and looking at before and after pictures in amazement... Here is my concern. I am not so scared of the surgery itself. I love my surg and have 100% confidence in him. I am scared I will fail. Is this normal??? I am scared I will lose all my weight and then put in right back on. I am scared I will stop using it as a tool and figure out ways to eat the things I shouldn't be eating. Why do I feel like this? Has anyone else been more scared about this then the actual surgery and pain? I read about a woman on here that gained 80 pounds back and others that have gained 20,30,40. I am also scared to death of being hungry. I feel like there is no possible way that "I" wont be hungry. I read mixed things about this. Sorry this is so long... thanks for your support Maris

Maris; I think we all have the fear that this isn't going to work for us. Think about it, if we'd been successful in the past, we wouldn't be at the point of requiring surgery. I'm familiar with the woman you're referencing that's gained 80 lbs. The good news is, she's here, she's getting support and she's finding her way back on track. I also know exactly what you mean about "how could I not be hungry?" First of all, there are lots of nerves cut in your stomach and pouch. It takes months for these to nerves to recover and reconnect, so that's one of the reasons you don't have a lot of physical hunger for at least 6-9 months post-op. Secondly, I found the first month post-op that my diet was so limited that the last thing I wanted to do was eat another cup of broth or SF jello. (At over 10 months post-op, I still can't bring myself to eat either of these things!) The not wanting to eat helped me break the cycle of what I call mindless eating - where we sit and shovel food in out of habit more than anything. I personally kept a strict regimine when it comes to exercise, water and vitamins. I tend to be a little less regimented when it comes to my diet. As long as I meet my daily protein goals, if I still have calories left, I allow myself to eat anything that doesn't make me physically ill. I believe that if we designate foods as "bad" it gives them power...the power to make us want them more. Any food in moderation is ok and I believe learning moderation is the key to my long term success. I hope this helps. Feel free to email me directly if you have more questions. Blessings, Jennifer

I had this same fear of failure and at least twice in the few weeks leading up to my date I would just break down in tears b/c I was so worried about this. After all the preparation and worry and the worries that I gave my family--what if this too failed? I talked a lot to my support person and my hubby and between the two of them I walked into surgery knowing that I could be strong and do this. As far as being hungry--its been almost 3 mos. and I can tell you that I have not once been hungry and that more than anything eating is a chore. I never thought I would ever feel that way about food. Food was my best friend, my greatest comfort and now I didn't really need it for anything but living. Your feelings are perfectly normal.