Has surgery changed your relationship.

 I'm about 2 weeks away from my surgery and have been with my boyfriend for a very short time (3 months) he has always told me how he likes big women and how he likes my body just the way it is. So I told him about surgery and he was just said "oh ok" and left it at that. I'm somewhat worried that me losing weight will make his feelings change. I'm wondering if any of your relationships have changed becasue of your significant weight loss. Also is single life any better?

 My boyfriend and I had been together almost a year when I decided To go ahead with it. At first he was scared I wouldnt want to be with him if I lost weight. Also even before I decided he always was very vocal about not dating "skinny" girls. I know am two weeks away from surgery and my boyfriend is actually watching what he eats and drinks tries not to eat things I cant eat in front on me is very supportive of my post op diet. I wont lie I didn't expect him to be as supportive as he is I kind of had the attitude that I am doing this with or without you I'm staying with you but this train is leaving so just know I'm going on a wild ride. I sometimes wonder about single life, but in my case my boyfriend and I have gotten closer. I wont lie I think if josh and I had been dating three months the surgery and emotions that come along with it wouldnt help. Hopefully he wants to go along with the ride with you. 

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years. He has been very supportive with my decisions. I had surgery on the 30th of April and I have been out of work now for 2.5 weeks. I do not know what is going on, but today he seemed to get in this weird mood. And I don't know if he understand how my emotions are all over the place. Sometimes men are hard to read, but I am hoping he gets over it! Good luck

well i haven't had surgery yet, I am actually 3 weeks pre-op but all i know is that if i don't have this surgery my relationship is going to fail, we have been together for 6 years and now at the age of 23 i am at my heaviest, its not that he doesnt love me or that my weight is an issue for him, he loves me just the way i am. the problem is that i don't love myself the way i am and it's a problem because i am depressed all the time or moody, i dont ever want to go anywhere so he goes to events and concerts by him self with his friends, also dont want to meet new people or try new things! basically i have become a boring miserable person and if i dont fix it i don't think he can deal with it any longer, he is a very fit guy eats healthy and spends a lot of time at the gym, if anything i think this surgery will make our relationship better. now don't get me wrong, i am not doing this for him, i am doing it for my self because i want to be happy and if iam happy then i can make him happy! its beyond the physical aspect and more about the emotional part of it.

Well I was with someone for a year before I had surgery. I ended up breaking it off about 2 months after. I realized he was a "chubby chaser" and honestly I wasn't going to stay fat for him. He started getting overly controlling cause I wanted to get out more. I don't deal with that.

Personally I am glad I was in my 20's when I had surgery (22 years old now 29). I got to go out and have my fun and really date. Now I am with someone who I can truely see myself with fits what I want and me him.

ive been with my bf for 5yrs on and off he ment when i was about 275 and was with me when i was 465 he never spoke about my weight we look at old pics and tear up togather we worked out togather and not so much any more he didnt see me in the hospital he was a little afraid to see me in pain my surgery took me from being just his gf to his  girl friend and best friend he does make comments that if i get smaller he will have issues but for the most part he is very supportive of me he said i changed a lil im a lil emotionaly at times i try him sometimes with my clothing but it made us better dont look at as a change just for u and just for looks look at as u going to get healthy include him go for walks share ur thoughts dont shut him out

I was in a relationship my now ex-husband for 6 years before surgery, and we got married when I was about a year post-op.  It was important to me that he loved me and wanted me when I was at my heaviest (about 320 pounds at the highest), all the way down to my lowest weight (I've been maintaining for about 4 years now at 140lbs, and I'm 5' 3").  We are getting a divorce now after 5 years of marriage, but it has little to do with my weight and more to do with...well, it's not worth getting into.  Basically, if the relationship is solid before-hand, then post-op it may not be perfectly smooth, but it can survive and be better.  It would worry me if he said he was just interested in bigger women - that says to me he may be either a little down on himself (and therefore like women who he perceives as not feeling great about themselves either, makes him feel more secure) or a little narrow-minded in his view of beauty - or you are just a wonderful person who he loves, and he's saying he is into bigger women to make you feel more secure (they are in a hard spot when we are considering surgery - what are they supposed to say? "yup, you definitely need it and I hope you get it" or "absolutely not, I don't support it" - either way they lose).  Surgery should be the make or break issue - if you are happy with him I hope it works out, but it's not the end of the world if it doesn't)

To your final question - After 11 years with the guy I married and thought I would be with forever, I was terrified of single life.  He left last Sept, so I've been on my own for a good while now, and once I got my footing I felt good, competent, powerful - lonely someitmes, but there would be something wrong with someone if they didn't crave human contact now and then.  I've started dating, and to tell you the truth, I feel like I am better able to make decisions that are not desperate now that I am happy with my body.  Part of the reason I stayed with my husband for the whole 11 years was I didn't feel like anyone else would want me.  That is so not the case (happily!). I turn men down or don't see them again if it isn't working, and I don't feel panic when I do that because I know that they are not the last ones who will inquire.  You don't have to hang on to this guy if you don't want to, but at the same time your relationship doesn't have to be over because your life is going to change.

Hope that helps.

  We broke up. The day I had surgery he texted me wanting me to feel sorry for him because he had to go to the doctor all day. I was in the freaking hospital! He basically didn't care that I was in the hospital so I dumbed the ******* I'm now dating think I might have a good one on the hook.

 Yikes! Yup, good decision to move on.  And good luck to you in your recovery/post-op journey, and good luck with the one you've hooked