Today I Decided to Get a Divorce

My surgery is 60 days away. And on Monday I found out my husband was cheating on me. I've been married for three years. Today I found out he's been cheating on me for at least half of the marriage with what I can prove but my heart tells me its been ever since we met. Even though I have a hate in my gut about this because of how my son will be affected I am hopeful that 2012 is my fresh start. So many people keep telling me to stick with it but my heart tells me to just leave him. What do you ladies think? So confused, I don't want to be alone but I can't live a lie anymore...

I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. Especially with being close to surgery date and all the emotions that come with that on its own.
No one can tell you what the right and wrong decision is, but we can support you in whatever you decide.
All I can suggest is that you be honest and true with yourself. You CAN do this on your own, and you won't be alone for the rest of your life. Find who you are, and what you want. You deserve to be treated well, and you deserve to be able to trust someone fully. The trust with your husband is gone, it will never come back, no matter how hard you try to move past it, it will be that nagging voice in the back of your mind for the rest of your lives together. I've been there, I know it all too well. I tried to forgive my ex-husband the first time, but after the second time, I was done.

Your life is about to change in ways that you cannot imagine. Your weight is going to melt off of you and you have a whole new life ahead of you. I ended my relationship with my BF about a month before surgery. I was sad in having to go through the journey alone, but now, I realize it was the best thing because I only had to concentrate on ME.

Hang in there hun. Take the time to seriously think about what you want. Just know that you deserve so much more!

Chica im sooo sorry !!!!!  No one knows how you feel right now. And it sucks to feel not appreciated and cheated.  Just think about what is best for you and your son. With all this surgery things you really dont need to add anymore stress. MY opinion is that if he cheated for that long, he really cant love you enough to  stop now or not do it again in the future, But its your family therfore your choice. From experience  i rather start new, once the trust is gone the relatioship goes TRUST i know! We dont forget and you will never be able to trust him again and u dnt deserve to live paranoid. Hugs !!!! You have my support with what ever decision you  make.

 All I can say is do what your heart and gut tells you. I know it sucks but no one should be lied to. You can do much better, and remember what comes around goes around. He will get his one day. 

Good luck!

Thank you ladies for all the supportive comments. At this point we are separated because I made him leave the house...I think this is the first step for me to learn to be on my own. He is going to start picking up his son every weekend and this weekend is the first time we've been apart in 4 years...all I know is that I do have this nagging voice already to just make a clean break to end it already so that it doesn't get too messy. I mean even when confronted he still lied...I had to get the whole truth from the other woman. To me that sends up a red flag that even after all that he stills tries to minimize everything as if it wasn't that serious...it's very frustrating. I feel that for me and my future it's best to start getting on my feet and then going through with the divorce. Half the marriage cheating and in the first 2-3 years is a horrible way to start a marriage which makes me realize he never cared at all. I should have been smart and kicked him to the curb when he kissed another woman while we were dating and tried to say he was unconscious drunk and had no control of her. But I ignored it and now look where I am at. I am going to use this separation selfishly and to my advantage for once. I am going to use this time to make sure all the business is in order so that when I do divorce him, my son and me will be taken care of. I don't feel the least bit sad about it either because obviously he didn't feel bad cheating on me while I was busting my ass as a full time student and mom while working full time taking care of our son and him and pretty much keeping the marriage and household afloat by myself. I don't know if I can get over this and I feel like this happened for a reason before my surgery. I feel this was all meant to be and that something better is out there waiting for me. I can't let him hold me back anymore. xoxo.

im sorry  :( , hugs .