Im so upset right now

I decided my surgery was for ME to tell people about,  when I choose to do so.  I have only told my mother, sister brother and 2 friends. No one else knows...But one of the friends I confided in decided to go and tell other people about my surgery.  I wouldn't have cared so much had she not added my name, and just said a friend of mine, BUT now people who I dont even know are talking about it and me, and close friends that I hadn't told yet now know.  I am very hurt by this because its my choice, and I'm not ashamed of it, but I am embarrassed right now.  I feel almost betrayed that something I asked to be kept a secret is now every ones news.

Sorry, just really needed to vent.

that's completely understandable! honestly, since i was told my insurance would cover my surgery, i've been telling anyone who will listen about it because i was and still am so excited. however, my grandmother went and told her entire church--which i used to go to--and it got back to an old friend of mine i haven't spoken to in over a year and there were just some people i didn't want to find out. i don't care if my coworkers know or my family or family friends. i do care if it gets back to people i knew in high school or a while back because i wanted this to be my surprise when i lost my weight and i feel like it was kind of taken from me? so i was angry too!

I completely understand both of you guys. I told my friends and some family at first. Then one person found out at work and it exploded. So, everyone knows there not much i can do about it, but embrasse it the best i can.

I still didn't tell most of my family.. I really don't think they need to know they see me only on holidays and what not, so there is no real reason why i should tell them. I also kept it off of facebook and things like that (not even joining the WLS groups on there or updating my pics).

Even tho people know out there... Its still your gift to you and you should still have some part of it to share when you want too.

Hugs!

awww that really sucks i'm sorry that happened to you. I was the same way only told a few people at first... i would have been horrified if someone told my secret to someone else. All i can say as much as it sucks its over now...now everyone knows... just tell ur friends u didnt tell yet that u were going to tell them u were just scared and waiting to wait a lil bit...be open and honest.  As for other people just gossiping try to ignore them...i know its hard but who cares what they think.  this surgery rocks and is going to change you life so much and prob make u very happy (it did for me)

I hope you feel better soon!

Thank you guys, your replies have actually helped me alot.  And Im not upset anymore, but I do plan on waiting til the approval goes through completely (I wont know till 2 weeks before my surgery date) to tell anyone else myself.  I actually talked to my friend about this , and she ofcourse tried to divert blame, which wasnt what I was intending for her to feel.  I jsut wanted her to know that it seriously upset and hurt my feeling, she then in turn talked to the girl she had told (who from what Im told is the one telling everyone? not sure, lots of gossip and stupidity).   But I have resolved my issue with said friend and feel better.  Everyone can just think what they want, its my life not theirs.  Heres to hoping I can remember and stick to that idea haha.    Thank you ladies very much, your posts really did help me clear my mind enough to see its not so bad.  <3

Seriously Grateful,
-Mary

 I told about a group of 5 people at my old university and now about 30 of my sorority sisters know.. thanks guys..
but i transferred schools so i really don't care. most of the poeple i hang out with now don't know.. and i'm cool with that. to a lot of my newer friends think i'm average-sized and always have been average (photos removed from facebook).. being average never felt so good! 
I have no need to tell people for the most part though. 

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dont be sad or mad if they are ur true friends they probly spoke about it our of pure concern and worry i went throught that fase as well