struggling....
Hello.... I had RNY 7 months ago..... and lost about 140 lbs so far....... (I still have about 50 to go)... it was probably the best decision of my life. I feel much healthier, and happier... but with that being said...
I am struggling so badly right now. I don't regret that decison for one instant, however the mishapen body, excess skin, flab, is so bothersome, and makes me feel so self-conscious. I can't vent to anyone else, because all I hear is some variation of "well what would you rather have, fat or skin?", or "yeah but you look good...."
again, I would much rather have excess skin rather than fat anyday... but I guess I just didn't realize how much the skin/flab would bother me... especially being young, single... I feel like a fraud if I ever hook up with a guy again! LOL, I look okay in clothes, but then undressed.... whole other story!
And my credit is terrible... so financing plastics, not really an option....
guess I just had to vent to people who understand where I'm at.......
I am struggling so badly right now. I don't regret that decison for one instant, however the mishapen body, excess skin, flab, is so bothersome, and makes me feel so self-conscious. I can't vent to anyone else, because all I hear is some variation of "well what would you rather have, fat or skin?", or "yeah but you look good...."
again, I would much rather have excess skin rather than fat anyday... but I guess I just didn't realize how much the skin/flab would bother me... especially being young, single... I feel like a fraud if I ever hook up with a guy again! LOL, I look okay in clothes, but then undressed.... whole other story!
And my credit is terrible... so financing plastics, not really an option....
guess I just had to vent to people who understand where I'm at.......
"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step" ~Martin Luther King
Hey,
I understand...I really do. I fluctuation between 135-140ish pounds, like half the size I was at some points in my life. If we could all just "be happy", as the song says..what a wonderful world this would be. We know all too well the reality. I am happy smaller, I can do so many things that I couldn't do before, I have energy, I have a new spark. But when I see myself naked, I still feel like I weigh 246lbs and it's really upsetting. Like you, we can't afford for me to have plastic surgery at the point in time...we as in my husband, son and I. It is hard because people just don't get what it's like to live inside a body that resembles a deflated balloon. I honestly have no boobs left and while I didn't think that would be a big deal, going from a D cup to maybe an A (with padding) has been really hard.
I know people say this but weight lifting has REALLY helped me with my arms and upper body. I have an injury in my hip right now so my lower half is really not so stellar but I'm working on it. Getting into a regular routine has really helped define my muscles and help my skin snap back a little. It's not perfect but it's the best I can do for what my options are at this point. Try looking up weight workouts for women online, it will give you some good ideas.
Don't worry about what guys think. Anyone who genuinely understands what you've been through will see you for who you are...and that's not excess skin. If they have a problem with it..it's theirs to deal with, not yours. Life is too short to deal with that sort of superficiality. There are people out there who will want to be with you regardless of what your arms or stomach looks like. Plus, when we are all old, grey and flabby none of that will even matter.
I have to tell myself this every single day but try to just enjoy today for what it is. We were lucky enough to be given today so I try to enjoy it, not perfect body and all. Again, life is too short not to and I don't want to look back when I'm 80 and regret a single thing.
Good luck
~Emily~
I understand...I really do. I fluctuation between 135-140ish pounds, like half the size I was at some points in my life. If we could all just "be happy", as the song says..what a wonderful world this would be. We know all too well the reality. I am happy smaller, I can do so many things that I couldn't do before, I have energy, I have a new spark. But when I see myself naked, I still feel like I weigh 246lbs and it's really upsetting. Like you, we can't afford for me to have plastic surgery at the point in time...we as in my husband, son and I. It is hard because people just don't get what it's like to live inside a body that resembles a deflated balloon. I honestly have no boobs left and while I didn't think that would be a big deal, going from a D cup to maybe an A (with padding) has been really hard.
I know people say this but weight lifting has REALLY helped me with my arms and upper body. I have an injury in my hip right now so my lower half is really not so stellar but I'm working on it. Getting into a regular routine has really helped define my muscles and help my skin snap back a little. It's not perfect but it's the best I can do for what my options are at this point. Try looking up weight workouts for women online, it will give you some good ideas.
Don't worry about what guys think. Anyone who genuinely understands what you've been through will see you for who you are...and that's not excess skin. If they have a problem with it..it's theirs to deal with, not yours. Life is too short to deal with that sort of superficiality. There are people out there who will want to be with you regardless of what your arms or stomach looks like. Plus, when we are all old, grey and flabby none of that will even matter.
I have to tell myself this every single day but try to just enjoy today for what it is. We were lucky enough to be given today so I try to enjoy it, not perfect body and all. Again, life is too short not to and I don't want to look back when I'm 80 and regret a single thing.
Good luck
~Emily~
"Tis better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you are not"
the mishapen body, excess skin, flab, is so bothersome, and makes me feel so self-conscious. That is exactly how I feel. Im so thankful for the surgery but Ive gotta say I have lower self-esteem now. This year has been the hardest most challenged year for me. Ive been so depressed some days. I can't wait to be down 140 lbs like you thats my goal and thats incredible that youve done that in only 7 months. I must be a slow loser.I think its gonna take us awhile to accept ourselves now. I dont even think our minds have caught up with our bodies yet.Im struggling with the exact same thing and Im scared to let anyone see my naked now lol its so funny how we didn't care as much when we were big. Good Luck. We just need to learn to be confident and okay with ourselves again <3
You may not be ale to afford plastic surgery now but you may be able to afford or finance it in the future. I had bad credit when I graduated from college but I was able to pull my credit score from the low 500s to the mid 600s in about a year. You can't have plastic surgery until you stop losing weight and have been stable at a certain weight for a couple of months so in the meantime you can work on your credit and start saving money. Don't get overwhelmed just take things one at a time. First focus on the weight loss and then the excess skin.
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