jealously ...

Has anyone has issues with jealousaly from others? friends or not? I recently had someone make a comment about me that bothered me ......... " at least I didnt have to have "pay" to become beautiful" .......... meaning have surgery. This really got to me, even thou I know it shouldnt.

Well they are an ass...you didn't pay to get beautiful...you had wls...you were already beautiful tell them to read a book....they operated on your stomach not your face.

hugs

That is so, pardon me, retarded.  Does this person not ever watch tv, read magazines or watch movies???  The entire Hollywood/movie star population PAY to become beautiful only they do it for vanity reasons, we have our surgery to SAVE OUR LIVES.   So it's ok for Heidi Montag to have 10 surgeries a pop so she can "feel better about herself" but if we take action to live a full, healthy life with all the lose skin and busting of our own asses to maintain a healthy weight..then we are cheating?    Geesh.  I'm sorry but I really hope you don't consider this person a friend because the statement they made was so anti-intellectual that I about want to puke.  Please if at all possible don't surround yourself with those type of people.  

Me being me would have come back with, "Well, it couldn't have been much more than you had to pay to become a total *****" 

~Emily~  

I've had a few people say it. One time my sister said it, and from that I sort of got the idea that some people aren't out to hurt you when they say this. They're just expressing themselves very poorly, and they are often so caught up in their misery they take it out on you. Of course, some are malicious, but why waste time on them?

There are some ppl who just don;t know how to say what they mean tactfully. And then there are those people like my friend Lilly.
We're really close, but I can tell she's jealous.
When I got a new really good job, she was happy for me. I could sense a hint of jealousy in the way she tried to suggest it wasnt the best job oppertunity. She wants to have the best job in our group.
But ever since I had my surgery, I have barely spoken to her. I never calls and neither does she. The last time she came over we had nothing to talk about. And I'm just in the beginning of the wight loss, but after the first week, she was "concerned" I was loosing too much, and that I wasn't eating enough. She says things in a way where she tries to make me feel bad for things being they way they are...cause she's jealous. And I don't even know why. She always looked good, and she has a great job, and people love her the first time they meet her.
But I don't spend too much time thinking about her. I kinda knew she would react the way she did, but told her mostly out of obligation. It's become easier and easier to avoid her, so she isn't even an issue anymore.

I have no room for negative influences in my life, so I just won;t accept any negativity..

..::Sophie::..

 Sophie, 

Your friend is just horribly insecure about, from what you say, most areas of her life.  Don't let her being unsure of herself drag you down.  What you could do is make an effort to really boost her up a little bit...sounds like she needs it.   Give her a call or go out for coffee, ask what she's doing, say you are really happy for her and glad that things are going so well for her.  Be genuine.  If that doesn't make her think about how she treats others by her words and actions, then maybe the friendship isn't worth it.  

~Emily~  

yes i think jealousy come with weight lost..they are use to you as sterotypically the "fat friend" now your as beautiful as you were on the inside as you are on the outside. Ihave had co workers say to me "its good your not going to be overweight anymore but now your going to lose that beautiful face of yours...wtf, then another co worker said i didnt know you had weight lost surgery i just thought you bought bigger pants..wtf im 75 lbs thinner..you jerk"


just smile at them and know that your changing your outside appearance for your HEALTH...it was a personal choice and if they dont understand it they are not worth it. You know who you are and why you did it.. whoever that person is she /he is not your friend.


take care and btw you were beautiful without the surgery.

eh, u shoulda say. well at least i can pay to become beautiful. cuz even if u paid  you  will stay ugly!!!!!!  lol, let it go! u know its so no true u were beautiful before n u`ll always be.
and if you paid or not  to be beautiful she/he thinks u ARE soo who cares??? ..... jealously, learn to enjoy it, cuz ur gonna hear alot of that crap! lol.

People suck and the people who were jealous of you before surgery are still going to be jealous after. They will just look for something else to **** on you for... like your job, hair, car, boyfriend, etc.

I lead a group on holiday last year with ten ladies, including my best friend who is also overweight, one of the ladies on the trip really wanted to have me lead her personally on tours and such, she spent the whole of the trip saying snide things about Alison. She also made comments to all the heavier people in the group - things like "big girls at the back" when we were doing group photos. She managed to be such a cow that she will never go on holiday with us again.

Just learn to take everything with a grain of salt and remember the reason you made your choice.

I agree with airforcewifey, they operated on your stomach not your face.  What a hater!