Pre-Op Dating

So I am in a dilemma, I'm pre op, and have met someone and we've gone out a couple times.  I haven't mentioned the fact of WLS, I'm not sure when or how to say it.  I could really use the feedback.  I know alot of people have misconceptions on how people "turn out" after WLS.  I won't be the same person phsyically that he met and i'm sure mentally, but I do really like him and that wouldn't change after surgery.  SO any feedback would help.  Thank you all soo much!!!

There are a few factors that you probably need to think about.  One how far out from surgery are you?  Do you have a lot of time to get to know him before you share something so personal?  Two are you ready to commit to focusing on a new relationship?  I'm finding that this is a very selfish time in my life.  Not in a bad way but for the first time I am making myself a priority and that means a lot to me.  I am lucky enough to have a husband who is dedicated to helping me.  His emotional support is huge and if this man were able to be there for you that would be awesome.  The statistics on divorce after WLS are high and that is with couples who have been together and committed to life not a new relationship that hasn't even had time to figure out what it is.  No matter what I'm sure you will do the right thing for you.  The number one thing is, if you tell him and he has a problem with it, I doubt he was the right guy for you anyway!!!!

According to my surgeon he's planning it for mid december if everything goes through alright.  SO not much time, and it would be kinda hard to hide something like this not that I would ever want to.  He doesn't seem like the type who wouldn't be supportive, but you're right if he isn't than he isn't the right guy.  Thanks for the help!

 Personally, I would definitely tell him before you have the surgery because I'm pretty sure you're going to go through a lot of changes in the months to come and if you're not open about it from the beginning then its going to cause problems. When I say that you are going to go through changes I'm not talking about the physical changes, I'm talking about the mental changes that the weight loss causes. I know that a lot of people on this board, and definitely me personally, have gone through many different emotional changes. Personally, I cannot imagine being in a relationship right now. I'm going through so many different emotions and changes with realizing who I am that I just don't think I could handle a relationship until I'm a little bit more adjusted to the new me. As much as I thought going into this surgery that it was only going to be the outside that changed, that definitely was not the case! 

That was my original intention on focusing on me throughout this whole thing, but I met him before I made this decision and decided I would go out with him with no intentions of it going anywhere because I knew I wanted to focus on myself, but we hit it off real well and I don't want to pass up someone who has these great qualities that I was looking for in someone long term.  I will definately tell him, just not sure how...lol...ughhhh!

I think if u really like this guy , he should take part of this process ur gonna need all the support u can get.
I think is wonderful u found someone before ur surgery cuz he really cares about u!. for me is really annoying when boys tell me like ur hot  and stuf and like wanna date me n stuff. n im like hella no! u knew me before n u were not intested soo no thanks lol. i know is kinda silly but is how i feel sometimes.
so i think that if u really like him and u wanna be in a realationship, yes he needs to know, n he needs to decide if he is gonna support u or not.
but is also a time u need to be focus on yourself  its a time for u. and u don`t need extra stress. but maybe is the one. so take it easy tell him about ur surgery and lets see how he reacts. then u can decide if he is a keeper or u have to next him! lol.
good luck n keep us posted
hugs

You're very right! Thanks!  I will keep you all updated....