In a rut

Do you guys ever feel like you are in a rut?  Thats how its been for the last week or so.  Just very crabby and short tempered.  My boyfriend and I never fight, but for whatever reason I picked like 4 stupid fights with him last weekend.  They were all cleared up and blown over in a matter of minutes, but still.  Work is kind of hectic at the moment.  Alot of changes are taking place--merges, selling of products, layoffs, etc etc--so thats all beginning to make me a little nervous.  Then, on top of it all, I haven't lost any weight in like 2 or 3 weeks.  Maybe even longer then that--I have kind of lost track.  I will be five months out on the 19th.  I have tried like crazy to up my protein and have been trying really hard to do five small meals a day like my nutritionist wants me to do.  I do really well during the week of getting in my protein and calories, but come the weekend, I'm horrible!  I probably only do like 1/2-3/4 the calories I'm suppose to and maybe 40 grams of protein.  I'm sure that doesn't help any.

Also, I have been dealing with some major body issues.  I carried all of my weight in my stomach, so of course that is sagging like crazy.  Its horrible!  When I look in the mirror, I don't see the 86 pounds lost.  I still see the fat girl from 5 months ago.  The only time I can really see the difference is when I look at pictures from Christmas and pictures from now.  Thats when I can see how much smaller my face has gotten.  People at work (who don't know about the surgery) approach me all the time to tell me how good I'm looking--so I know people notice, but my mind is SO far from catching up.  I am really apprehensive about the way my naked body looks.  In clothes I look amazing...but without them...not good at all!  The boyfriend and I talked about it and he is crazy supportive.  Tells me how that doesn't matter to him and that I need to look at how far I have come.  Thats great and all, and I know thats how I should look at it, but I just can't get my mind around that.  I don't know....

Sorry for the rant, I just had to put it out there.  I'm sure many of you understand where I'm coming from.  Thanks for letting me vent!

I’m sorry to hear you are in a rut.
I have not had my surgery yet, I get my surgery date on Friday.

With that said I do know what you are going through.
I use to be a size 12-14. Even at that size I wasn’t happy.
All I ever saw the old me.. size 20. (Im a 24 now)

My husband would always tell me I looked great, but I never saw it.
I always thought I big and ugly.

When I applied for my WLS I had to do a psyche evaluation like most people.
I was totally honest with him, I told him about my struggle with my weight and my appearance issues.

I only saw him once, never saw him again.
He passes me.
I now know that when I am back down to a 12 or lower I will not think I am big.

The saggy skin will be my battle scares from my struggle with weight.
I have 2 of my photos on my frig from when I was much smaller, it helps me make the right choices.

I get in my moods as well, stress will get ya down.
When you are in a rut or just not having a great day.
Go look in a mirror, and say I’m a survivor. I’ve lost this weight, I’m a fighter, I can do anything I set my mind to.
I know it sounds silly, but it helps me.   My sister died this year in February, She wasn’t always a heavy woman but when she died she was about 400 pounds. She had all of my health issues and more. With that said she would always tell me when I would go see her at the hospital. “Don’t let your weight, or how you think you look effect what you do and don’t do in life, live it and enjoy it, don’t let it pass you by like I did because I didn’t like the way I looked."   For the 1^st time as a big woman, I wore a sleeveless top a few months back. Her words and her strength made me strong enough to do something I didn’t even do when I was a size 12. I always hated my arms, but she helped me get over it.

I hope this finds you well. Warm Regards.,,

It must be a moonphase or something. I've been overly *****y and emotional lately too. I hate my body, and I had a "fat" day yesterday. No matter how good I know I look, my brain just won't believe it sometimes. I hate my sagging boobs, batwings, sagging belly, etc.

I think we all have our periods of "nutzo". The important thing is to realize that this too shall pass, and we can appreciate the good more than the negative. Or at least that's what I keep telling myself.

We'll get through this. YAY for supportive loved ones!

i`m sorry u are having a bad day hun. and yes i`ve been also in a very bad mood. don´t know why.
and girl i swear everything will worth it at the and of the way. if u don´t like the extra skin there is always plastics to make u look even more beautiful than u are now. so now worry about be healthy taking ur vits and losing the weight(stall are very commun) and so happy that u have a wonderful bf that supports u that`s very importatn. use that in ur favor.
and remember u cannot fix in 5 months all the issues u had beore ur wls. soooo keep it up.
hugs

Thanks girls!!  Your words and encouragement really mean a lot!!  I'm trying like crazy to turn things around and look at how far I have come.  I knew posting on here would be good for me.  Its good to hear I'm not the only one that feels like this here and there.  I swear--the bad moods are all over the place this week!  LOL