"I hate fat people"
Let me get your guys' opinion on something that happened to me today. I'm in school, and was talking to some friends of mine. None of them know I have had the surgery and was obese most of my life, I tend not to tell people because I'm never sure how people will react.
Anyway, suddenly, one of 'em starts talking about how much they hate fat people and how lazy they are. All of 'em join in to the conversation and start talking about people being pigs, etc. I just sat there shocked, I know these are good hearted people. I'm not sure what I should do, I feel like I've been personally attacked (I still see myself as fat), even though the conversation was not at all directed at me. I'm really torn at this point, I considered these people good friends.
Do I cut ties with these friends or ignore and move on? anyone else have similiar experiences?
Anyway, suddenly, one of 'em starts talking about how much they hate fat people and how lazy they are. All of 'em join in to the conversation and start talking about people being pigs, etc. I just sat there shocked, I know these are good hearted people. I'm not sure what I should do, I feel like I've been personally attacked (I still see myself as fat), even though the conversation was not at all directed at me. I'm really torn at this point, I considered these people good friends.
Do I cut ties with these friends or ignore and move on? anyone else have similiar experiences?
what a bunch of buttheads. when my highschool students say dumb things like "i hate gay people," I usually say something like "do you actually know any gay people?" or "i'm gay, do you hate me?" (i am not actually gay, but that's besides the point).
maybe try "you don't have to be fat to be a pig" and glare intensely.
you can say "i used to be fat and i worked very hard at it." to dispell the lazy myth.
maybe you can help raise awareness by telling them they sound like a bunch of ignorant KKK members getting ready for an lynching.
maybe you can just punch them in the balls.
maybe try "you don't have to be fat to be a pig" and glare intensely.
you can say "i used to be fat and i worked very hard at it." to dispell the lazy myth.
maybe you can help raise awareness by telling them they sound like a bunch of ignorant KKK members getting ready for an lynching.
maybe you can just punch them in the balls.
well. people talk bad of things that they ignore about. so don´t take it personal. I know is hard and it makes me unconfortable sometimes `cuz lots of people forget that i used to be heavier and make comments about fat people and they realized what they did and feel bad about that. what you should have done is say you used to be one of those people and that they are not lazy. one step at the time we have to start educating people I know is hard. and that there is time when we discriminate ourselfs 2. but we have to do something about it.
but u are in your right of walk away anyways they are dorks...
but u are in your right of walk away anyways they are dorks...
HEY I AGREE WITH marianna theyre dorks...you know on this journey you're going to discover who your true friends are...some will stand by, others will just rediculue you...in the end its up to you weather or not you sourround yourself with postive people or stay in your particular social circle who seem like they are narrow minded....you could just say AT THE END OF THE DAY GUYS, WE ALL COME FROM MONKIES.... :-D maybe that will shut them up 
Wow. How incredibly insensitive and ignorant. I'm so sorry this happened today.
I too would have felt personally attacked. I've been overweight/obese my entire life, and even though I've lost 90 pounds, I still have about 70 to lose so I'm still considered obese. However, I know that when I reach my goal, I will probably still feel psychologically fat for many years to follow... It takes a long time for the mind to catch up with the body.
Anyway, that being said, you and I must have very different personalities because I would have spoken up immediately. Lol! I don't usually tell people about my surgery either, but in that situation I would have because these people obviously needed a little education and correction; and it would come best from someone whom they respect and know personally.
I think it's a little extreme to cut ties with them over this, but it also seems a little late to bring it up at this point since the moment has passed. However, if it happens again, I would definitely let them know where you stand. In the meantime, you have been given some disappointing insight into the minds and opinions of these people and that sucks, but If I were you, I would just forgive them and chalk it up to the fact that they're ignorant and simply don't understand. At least you have a support system here with people who DO understand.
Hope you have a better day tomorrow!
Nichole
I too would have felt personally attacked. I've been overweight/obese my entire life, and even though I've lost 90 pounds, I still have about 70 to lose so I'm still considered obese. However, I know that when I reach my goal, I will probably still feel psychologically fat for many years to follow... It takes a long time for the mind to catch up with the body.
Anyway, that being said, you and I must have very different personalities because I would have spoken up immediately. Lol! I don't usually tell people about my surgery either, but in that situation I would have because these people obviously needed a little education and correction; and it would come best from someone whom they respect and know personally.
I think it's a little extreme to cut ties with them over this, but it also seems a little late to bring it up at this point since the moment has passed. However, if it happens again, I would definitely let them know where you stand. In the meantime, you have been given some disappointing insight into the minds and opinions of these people and that sucks, but If I were you, I would just forgive them and chalk it up to the fact that they're ignorant and simply don't understand. At least you have a support system here with people who DO understand.
Hope you have a better day tomorrow!
Nichole
Ugh what a messed up thing to say! I think that obesity is something that people really don't understand unless they have known someone who struggled with it, or have struggled with it themselves!
Your friends were being insensitive, but I don't think it's necessary to cut ties with them completely. You need to say something if it bothers you! Tell them about your struggle, or don't but you can still stick up for the person that you used to be :)
Good luck... hope today is better!
Your friends were being insensitive, but I don't think it's necessary to cut ties with them completely. You need to say something if it bothers you! Tell them about your struggle, or don't but you can still stick up for the person that you used to be :)
Good luck... hope today is better!
Amanda
"impossible is nothing"
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